Turn 9"Help" with fixing up the TARDIS, it would be very "bad" if it "somehow" broke down and the gang had to walk on foot, "very" "bad" "indeed".
6"..."
*sigh/hiss*
Ssarscel turns toward the remainder of the people who had all-too-recently been inside the tavern.
"Well then.
Regardlessssss. I ssstill need to get to the Florencccce Memorial library for ressearch, and will need protection. Can you lot manage that without tearing a hole in reality again?
Sorry, god. It’s just a phone booth. There used to be one just like it on main street in my village, and I never saw anyone there complain when it grew seven times its height, demolished the neighbouring pub, and vanished two days later with an echoing noise like metal being scraped against metal. Why can’t youse be like them. They just made a circle of stones around where it had been and conducted the ritual of the stone of god complete with sacrificed civil servants and the pub came back. Nooo, youse have to complain. The warlord probably counts as a civil servant, so you could even conduct the ritual. Honestly, people these days.
Seán heads back to the TARDIS and tries to decrease its size again. If there’s time, he’ll try and triangulate the location of the mountains and the rough area the doom mug may be using whatever mapping software the TARDIS has.
5"This... this is a fucking Tuesday. Speaking of which, I see we're a few men down. Wonderful."
Adam muttered some curse words under his breath.
While muttering to himself, Adam stealthily puts an enchantment on Thainos, because let's be frank, that disguise isn't going to fool an ageless Nephilim, that will give him a serious allergic reaction to dairy products. When I say curse words, I mean it.
"Thank you."
Proceed to the Florence Memorial library with anyone who will accompany me.
1Adam turned to Ssarscel
"Yeah, we can go to the library, not my original plan, but that's basically the story of my life at this point."
Ssarscel looks on at the ruins of the bar. "Well then. Regardlessssss. I ssstill need to get to the Florencccce Memorial library for ressearch, and will need protection. Can you lot manage that without tearing a hole in reality again?" Adam replies.
"This... this is a fucking Tuesday. Speaking of which, I see we're a few men down. Wonderful."Adam muttered some curse words under his breath. His mysterious powers somehow imbue an actual effect into the words.
d100=76 Somehow, he and Juainos become linked. Both of them develop a serious dairy allegy, and what triggers a reaction in one will affect both of them. Adam turned to Ssarscel.
"Yeah, we can go to the library, not my original plan, but that's basically the story of my life at this point." "Thank you."
The two of them set off out of town with whoever decides to accompany them. They make it a good way out into the desert in search of Florence Memorial, before realizing that they're lost and the canteen had a leak.
Meanwhile, Shaun and Juainos work on the TARDIS. They do an excellent job getting the machine up and running. Juainos almost seems disappointed somehow, as if he was trying to sabotage the craft and instead made only improvements. Of course, Juainos would never do something like that. Shaun's TARDIS now provides a +1 on travel rolls through space or time.
After the repairs are done, Shaun uses the TARDIS computer to determine the location of the Doom Mug. He receives detailed 3D imagery of the destroyed mug, and coordinates to its location. The doomsday weapon is shattered against the side of a mountain. Extremely high winds blow all around the area.
GUNTHAR HORNHELM glares from his precarious handhold at the approaching horrors.
"You dare impugn the honor of GUNTHAR's noble compatriot? Then perish, fell creatures, before the steel of GINNUNGAGAP! Perish before the WRATH of GUNTHAR!"
And with that and a feeble yell, GUNTHAR leaps into battle!
2+1 for axe, -1 for Rana's 1.Rana grabs Gunthar to keep him from attacking and continues talking to them in the Eldritch language
”There was a seven headed goat who intended to destroy both of our worlds. I was planning to return your servants when the goat demons stopped eating the universe. Something happened that destroyed most milk, and it’s difficult to make portals here. I can leave the Byakhee and we can return to the material plane to find milk for you, it could heal those that were hurt”
Put Gunthar down near Joshua, then Fly the Byakhee towards them, then leave its body and return to my group
I am no longer controlling your servants. The Byakhee is yours again. What kind of debt do you need? We can get things from the material plane here, maybe you can use them to make new servants, to replace the ones killed by the seven headed goat and its demons
1Just observe the situation and how it will evolve for now.
If the eldritch beings will attack us, fend them off and run towards the tower.
If it goes smoothly, then... I guess I'll run towards the tower.
3, 6(Creatures:Attack Joshua)
4 vs 5"You dare impugn the honor of GUNTHAR's noble compatriot? Then perish, fell creatures, before the steel of GINNUNGAGAP! Perish before the WRATH of GUNTHAR!"Rana attempts to stop the NOBLE WARRIOR and talk the monsters down, but all she manages to do is slow him down slightly. As a result, GUNTHAR's heroic YELPING and BRAVE CHOPPING only manage to annoy the monsters slightly. A set of tendrils lash out at Joshua. The two duel inconclusively for a moment, and then Joshua turns and retreats to the tower. By approaching counter-clockwise rather than GUNTHAR's clockwise approach, Joshua is able to find the entrance.
It's full of ghouls.
continue searching for rumors around town about milk
4Given the sudden lack of a bar, you're forced to search elsewhere for signs of milk. You hear the legends about the Doom Mug at White Mountain forest, of course, and the rumor about the T'zzz cult. There's also a guy trying to collect pigeons, claiming they can be used to produce milk. Since they aren't mammals, relatively more of them survived in comparison to the traditional sources.
Wake up
3You struggle to wake up, through a series of bizarre dreams. You imagine yourself crashing through a window in a pre-apocalyptic house, hot on the trail of milk. You see an ambiguous man who isn't really a vampire. You even see your master, T'zzz, dreaming all we see or seem.
Weird. You wake up and find yourself in your ritual chambers again.
Okay get everyone and me to march out into the countryside to find some milk.
4The townsfolk clear well out of the way when they see a man, a catgirl (who is expressionlessly singing
Nyanshin as she walks) and a pack of sewer clowns all walking out of town. You all head into the wastelands in search of milk. As you leave, you see a man entering the town with what almost looks like a jug of milk tucked under his jacket.
Set a virus inside the avatar that plays Nyanshin in the controller's data network.(FISH Attack)
Then jump to the nearest network to just make a body copy on the spot, giving this up as somewhat of a bad job..
4, 5You successfully leave the virus behind. Your old body begins to endlessly recite the song, indicating your success.
You abandon the compromised network and start again. You escape to the original connection you started from, generating a new form to take. This time, you make sure to harden it against hostile intelligences in your network. John's trick won't work twice.
What does one do with milk? What would you do with normal milk.... Yes...
Go to the grocery store and purchase cereal.
(There were a lot of ways you could take that question, but that was the exact answer and result I was hoping for.)
5You know what must be done. You sneak back into town. You go to the shop and buy a box of old Cheerios, and you "pour" the ghost milk. At first, it's only a blurry, fuzzy afterimage of milk. Then, sound returns. A few moments later, and the cereal is suddenly knocked aside by the flow. Real milk, pure and true, just like the old days, is pouring into the cereal.
You win the game!What do you do next?
Alright, these nutso's seem rather occupied. But should prove useful. The Superior Neanderthal brain will outsmart them! First, consult the GREAT CODEX for hints regarding the location of milk.
1+1 as compensation for the dice apparently hating you so much.You try to consult the GREAT CODEX for advice on finding milk. Unfortunately, its information hasn't been updated since the last couple versions and is fairly out of date. It just says "Milk:Quest item, edible, 1lb. Usually available at any store."
SEDUCE THE GIRAFFE-ZEBRA-THINGS
SEDUCE THEM
(That was not the tactic I was expecting, and I really didn't expect that result.)
5The giraffe-zebra-things surround you as you look for a way out. No flamethrower, and they've got you surrounded. They're closing in on you, when you suddenly have an idea. You rapidly identify the one that looks like it might be in charge, and complement her shiny pelt. The okapis stop in confusion, and you methodically flirt with every single one in turn. In short order, you successfully seduce the okapis.
"Holy shit what is your deal, I not going to steal your shitty car, just put the damn gun down and I'll leave."
Jump behind his car, then if he puts the gun away leave, but if he doesn't put away the gun try to shoot him with my crossbow.
5The chupacabra reacts with confusion, pointing his shotgun at you. Finally, he lowers the weapon. "You really mean that, don't you? Huh, sorry about trying to kill you. You don't often meet decent folk out here, you know?"
OOC:I wasn't sure who still intended to go with Adam and Ssarscel, so I wrote it ambiguously.
Author
Topic: Minimalism and Milk 4 (Read 81006 times)