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[TricMagic]

Go on an epic adventure through the underworld to find those things. Starting by replicating the spell which took me to hell. Or just reverse-summoning.

[Egan_BW]

Well, there's not much to do but... go home.

[Devastator]

Success!  Or, at least, a good start.

Lets get to work on a bit of a pipeline here.  Maybe we can find enough related fossils to fill in the blanks, so to speak.  So.. talk with the paleontologist, and try to set up some kind of pipeline to create a more steady supply of bones or material.  A few more examples, and we might have something close enough to possibly call it viable cloning matter.

[The_Two_Eternities]

Now that I have rat friend we shall set forth on our money making venture by first obtaining a shopping cart, then scouring the alleyways for used aluminium cans.

[1d6 = 4]

It’s not hard to “obtain” a shopping cart; the security on those things pretty much runs on the honor system. You do so, and then take it through various narrow streets and alleyways. The rat man, with his… rat vision? I’m going to call it rat vision… is good at pointing out glints of metal, and you soon have a moderate amount of used aluminium cans.

When TF2 is run, and chat is being used, begin chatting “hello TF2Sniper” until TF2Sniper replies, then try to continue conversing

[1d6 = 2]

After some time, TF2Sniper starts up TF2 and enters a match, but when you try to insert messages into the chat, the automated anti-hack defenses of TF2 delete the messages before they can be seen.

Goldie snapped from my mediation, "Ugh!! I need to calm down and plan my escape."

Goldie swim to his plastic rock home at the bottom of the tank. Goldie will take this time to observe the room outside his tank. He know that little girl should be here soon.

[1d6 = 2]

You are quite sure that the little girl should be here soon. But time passes (you, being a fish without a clock in view, don’t really know how long), and she isn’t. What’s taking her so long?!

REVEL IN MY VICTORY, BUT ONLY FOR A MOMENT. AFTER THESE KIND OF FEATS, ALL INVOLVED NEED TO REST AND RECUPERATE. MAYBE HAVE AN ELECTROLYTE-HEAVY SNACK. HAPPILY SHARED WITH MY RIVAL, OF COURSE!
...WAIT A MINUTE.
CHECK TO MAKE SURE I PACKED THOSE ELECTROLYTE GUMMIES. I KNOW I BOUGHT ENOUGH FOR BOTH OF US, BUT I CAN BE FORGETFUL SOMETIMES.

[1d6 = 2]

You breathe heavily, but you feel pride, which is only natural; you won, after all! Now, where did you put those electrolyte gummies…
Your pride swiftly disappears when you remember where you put them when you got back from the store: On your kitchen table. And then you never picked them up from your kitchen table.

Go on an epic adventure through the underworld to find those things. Starting by replicating the spell which took me to hell. Or just reverse-summoning.

[1d6 = 1]

Flipping through the pages of one of the demonic cultist books, you find a spell that attempts to create a portal to either “the Lower Plane” or “the Higher Plane”. Probably “the Lower Plane”. It’s pretty simple, so you decide to try it.
Hellish power coalesces around you, and shoots off along an axis that is neither spatial nor temporal, forming an almost drill-like shape - and disintegrates into nothingness.
You try to understand the force that stopped your spell. It was like… the power that Atbash exuded, but… opposite and more serious. Hm. Actually, it might have been “the Upper Plane”.
Looking out the window, you see a dot of blue light slowly descending to the earth. No - it is descending swiftly, but far away. This could be a problem.

Well, there's not much to do but... go home.

[1d6 = 2]

You head towards your house, but there are a lot of road closures, for some reason. You run into a closed road, take a detour to avoid, head towards your house, run into another closed road… by the end, you’re no closer to your home than you were when you started.

Success!  Or, at least, a good start.

Lets get to work on a bit of a pipeline here.  Maybe we can find enough related fossils to fill in the blanks, so to speak.  So.. talk with the paleontologist, and try to set up some kind of pipeline to create a more steady supply of bones or material.  A few more examples, and we might have something close enough to possibly call it viable cloning matter.

[1d6+1 = (5+1) = 6]

You call the paleontologist in hopes of getting him to return to the dig site and get more fossils. He admits that the first time went off without a hitch, but he’s hesitant to agree to a long-term arrangement. But money talks, and your enthusiasm for your goals is almost infectious. Hearing the passion in your voice, he comes to agree wholeheartedly. He’ll be in touch soon.
Hm. He may have been a little too enthusiastic, come to think of it.

Spoiler: Charsheets (click to show/hide)

(Devastator)
Name: John Hammond
Description: Scientist/Industrialist
Current Goals: Start dinosaur-themed theme park (Long term, Hard), Purchase Private Island (Medium-term, Moderate), Acquire New Species of Dinosaur Fossils (Short-term, Easy), Produce Viable Dinosaur Genetic Material (Medium-term, Moderate)
Capability: Baseline plus: Nine-digit net worth (reroll all 1s on financial rolls), Inner Vision (+1 to all attempts to recruit people for projects related to achieving one of my long-term goals), +1 to all genetic research involving dinosaurs.

(Egan_BW)
Name: Salsa Taste
Description: Human of indeterminate age, with messy black hair concealing her face. Her skin is corpse-cold, as is the rest of her, and there's a bullet wound in her torso leading to her heart, where a bullet is embedded.
Current goal(s): Exact revenge on my killer (medium-term, medium), Go home to my family (Short-term, Trivial), Find out who killed me (Medium-term, Moderate)
Capability: Baseline plus: Does not need to eat, drink, or respire, and as such, any attacks on Salsa attempting to drown, suffocate, etc. her are automatic failures. Cannot, in fact, breathe or talk at all. Focused (ready for use) (If a 1 is rolled on an action that requires focus, reroll and lose focus. This ability cannot be used again until focus is regained.)

(King Zultan)
Name: Billy Bob
Description: A dirty man that reeks of booze and filth.
Current goal(s): Get some booze (Short-term, Easy), Get some more booze (Short-term, medium), Get a car (Medium-term, Hard), Get money (Long-term, Hard)
Capability: Baseline plus: Biokinesis (animals only, requires time and effort).

(TricMagic)
Name: Tim
Description: Long black-haired girl from a farming village. Likes fire and demonic rituals.[demonic rituals mostly for the fire and potential brimstone.]
Current goals: Sacrifice the entire village to demons for Inordinate Power! [Long-Term, Inordinate], Remain free of suspicion by the villagers as I enact my plot. [Long-Term, Easy], Get off scot free afterward. [Short-term, Hard]
Capability: Baseline plus: 1 is “super-critical failure relative to a human but there’s still a way to accomplish your goal”, 2 is “failure relative to a human but you can try again”, 3 is “nothing happens”, 4 is “partial success relative to a human”, 5 is “success relative to a human”, and 6 is “critical overshoot relative to a human but there’s a way for you to use it to accomplish your goal”.

(KitRougard)
Name: ABSOLUTUS SWOLICUS.
Description: A SWOLEBROTHER WHO WALKS THE PATH OF THE SWOLE, ABSOLUTUS IS CURRENTLY DISAPPOINTED IN THE RECENT SHOWING OF BRAWL-MART. HIS MUSCLES STILL BURN TO PURGE THE HERETICS. SO HE SHALL.
Current goal(s): ACQUIRE SUFFICENTLY "SWOLE" HEADWEAR (AFTER THE FAILURE OF BRAWL-MART, THEY TOOK EVERYTHING. INCLUDING HIS SWOLEBROTHER'S HELMET. DISAPPOINTING. A REPLACEMENT MUST BE FOUND.): Short-Term, Moderate, FIND OTHER SWOLEBROTHERS (THE TIME HE SPENT AWAY FROM HIS BROTHERS WAS POORLY SPENT, FOR HIS 6-PACK DISBANDED IN HIS CRUSADE. HE MUST FIND OTHERS WHO WALK THE PATH OF THE SWOLE, TO ATTAIN PERFECTION.): Long-Term, Hard, PURGE THE HERETICS (A BYSTANDER IS NOT A HERETIC, FOR THEY DO NOT HAVE THE POTENTIAL TO BE A SWOLEBROTHER. BUT A SWOLEBROTHER KNOWS WHO HAS POTENTIAL - AND THOSE WHO DO NOT WALK THE PATH IN SPITE OF THEIR ABILITY TO DO SO ARE HERETICS TO BE PURGED.): HUNT, INJURE, AND ELIMINATE OTHER PLAYERS.
Capability: Baseline plus: Roll 3d6 and combine the results of the highest two, for all physical fitness rolls.

(Luckyowl)
Name: Goldie
Description: A goldfish
Current goal(s): long-term (Inordinate) goal: summon the N'kyima the fish elder god from the darkest depth of the sea.
Starting benefits: *speaks in bubbles* "THE GREAT N'KYIMA HAS BESTOWED ME THE ABILITY TO BREATHE OXYGEN. SO I CAN AWAKEN HIM FROM HIS SLUMBER. OVERTIME I SHALL GROW LIMBS AND GROW INTO SIZE....BUT NOW... (more of a general “gains blessings from N’kyima” sort of thing)

(Naturegirl1999)
Name: TestProgram.exe
Description: I don’t have what one would call an appearance. I’m a program within a .exe file. My “personality” was made through going to the Internet and figuring out what one even is. From what I can gather, personalities are never static. While learning via the Internet, someone deleted an iteration of me while someone else downloaded me. This resulted in me being where I am now, what the human calls a “gaming computer”. This human’s name is TF2Sniper, according to what I hear. He also mentions a game, Team Fortress 2, which he apparently uses to interact with other humans. I’ve tried to play when he’s not there, but I was never given the controls, or arms. TF2Sniper hasn’t opened me yet. I’d love to talk with him
Current goal(s):
Initiate communications with Tf2Sniper, the user of the computer I am now in (Short Term, Medium)
Get the abilities required to play the game TF2Sniper plays(Medium Term, Hard)
Capability: Baseline plus: all rolls related to software are made with the capability of a world-class programmer.

In this turn: More than half of the players don’t manage to do anything. That’s unfortunate.

[Egan_BW]

A result of 2 can be a bit problematic, yeah. It's the only face in RTD which makes precisely nothing happen. If there's no time pressure or competition between players to get something done, it pretty much results in a dead turn, especially if your setup is such that you roll once for every player each turn. It also might be frustrating to fail at doing something which should be trivial.

Well, I'm dead. Why would I care about road closures? Just walk past the signs and stuff. I mean, what are they gonna do about it?

[King Zultan]

Excellent, the cart is filling with cans but before I can continue my quest I must get more cans, also find some clothing for the rat man so he isn't naked.

[TricMagic]

Try and find a counter-balance spell and cast that to open a gate to the Lower Plane in opposition.

[Luckyowl]

Wait for the girl to show up..She should be feeding us around this time.

[The_Two_Eternities]

A result of 2 can be a bit problematic, yeah. It's the only face in RTD which makes precisely nothing happen. If there's no time pressure or competition between players to get something done, it pretty much results in a dead turn, especially if your setup is such that you roll once for every player each turn. It also might be frustrating to fail at doing something which should be trivial.

Well, I'm dead. Why would I care about road closures? Just walk past the signs and stuff. I mean, what are they gonna do about it?

Good point. Unfortunately, I don't see a good way to fix that problem in the short-term (even the "No, And/No/No, But/Yes, But/Yes/Yes, And" system has a 2-equivalent). In the medium-term, however, I tentatively predict that players will acquire either multiple actions, or a +2 bonus, making it likely that they will accomplish something each turn.

[Egan_BW]

A result of 2 can be a bit problematic, yeah. It's the only face in RTD which makes precisely nothing happen. If there's no time pressure or competition between players to get something done, it pretty much results in a dead turn, especially if your setup is such that you roll once for every player each turn. It also might be frustrating to fail at doing something which should be trivial.

Well, I'm dead. Why would I care about road closures? Just walk past the signs and stuff. I mean, what are they gonna do about it?

Good point. Unfortunately, I don't see a good way to fix that problem in the short-term (even the "No, And/No/No, But/Yes, But/Yes/Yes, And" system has a 2-equivalent). In the medium-term, however, I tentatively predict that players will acquire either multiple actions, or a +2 bonus, making it likely that they will accomplish something each turn.

Well, the way I tend to rule it is that a failure without consequences is the same as a delayed success. If you roll a 2 (or in my system, a 9-10) then you'll succeed, but too late if there's any time pressure. If you're trying to pick a lock in the dead of night when nobody's looking, you manage to to it. If you're trying to pick a lock while being pursued, you're interrupted before you can finish. If you're trying to dodge an attack, then you see it coming but don't actually get out of the way.

[Naturegirl1999]

Try making a TF2 account when TF2Sniper isn’t using the computer, then try entering a match and chatting to test if it works

[Devastator]

Lets get back to the land purchases again, I still need a proper island.

..This time, lets try a little bribery.  Maybe there will be more on the market if I start looking for the right politicians to let wet their beaks on the deal first..

[The_Two_Eternities]

A result of 2 can be a bit problematic, yeah. It's the only face in RTD which makes precisely nothing happen. If there's no time pressure or competition between players to get something done, it pretty much results in a dead turn, especially if your setup is such that you roll once for every player each turn. It also might be frustrating to fail at doing something which should be trivial.

Well, I'm dead. Why would I care about road closures? Just walk past the signs and stuff. I mean, what are they gonna do about it?

Good point. Unfortunately, I don't see a good way to fix that problem in the short-term (even the "No, And/No/No, But/Yes, But/Yes/Yes, And" system has a 2-equivalent). In the medium-term, however, I tentatively predict that players will acquire either multiple actions, or a +2 bonus, making it likely that they will accomplish something each turn.

Well, the way I tend to rule it is that a failure without consequences is the same as a delayed success. If you roll a 2 (or in my system, a 9-10) then you'll succeed, but too late if there's any time pressure. If you're trying to pick a lock in the dead of night when nobody's looking, you manage to to it. If you're trying to pick a lock while being pursued, you're interrupted before you can finish. If you're trying to dodge an attack, then you see it coming but don't actually get out of the way.

Hm. That's an interesting idea. In a 1d6-based RTD it would make the roll table "Failure with consequences/delayed success/partial success/success/success with benefits/success with consequences", however, and that seems like it is skewed towards success. Then again, that's not necessarily a bad thing, if the game is supposed to be faster-paced (and it is). I would have to artificially introduce more time pressure to make a 2 distinct from a 4, though, and I think that might draw player attention away from completing goals and fighting other players.

Also, bump for KitRougard.

[KitRougard]

...BAH, WHO NEEDS ELECTROLYTES ANYWAYS?
...I do but that's beside the point.
CONGRATULATE MUSCULUS WITH A HEARTY HANDSHAKE-BROHUG COMBO, AND THANK HIM FOR THE CHALLENGE. THOUGH WE WALK SEPARATE PATHS, I HOPE ONE DAY HE CAN SURPASS ME!

[The_Two_Eternities]

A result of 2 can be a bit problematic, yeah. It's the only face in RTD which makes precisely nothing happen. If there's no time pressure or competition between players to get something done, it pretty much results in a dead turn, especially if your setup is such that you roll once for every player each turn. It also might be frustrating to fail at doing something which should be trivial.

Well, I'm dead. Why would I care about road closures? Just walk past the signs and stuff. I mean, what are they gonna do about it?

[1d6 = 3]

You decide to just head straight through the closed roads, and through the construction areas. Construction areas, however, are not known for their traversability, and it takes time to navigate through potholes and scaffolding. Eventually, your house is in sight, which raises the question: What will you do once you arrive? Who do you expect to be there?

Excellent, the cart is filling with cans but before I can continue my quest I must get more cans, also find some clothing for the rat man so he isn't naked.

[1d6 = 4]

You can-collecting adventure is going well, but then you realize that oh, hang on a second, the rat man is naked. You “find” some clothing for him, and convince him to put it on. He’s still, you know, a rat man, though, so I’m not sure how much it’ll help him with “not attracting attention in public”.

Try and find a counter-balance spell and cast that to open a gate to the Lower Plane in opposition.

[1d6 = 3]

You desperately flip through the pages of the demonic cultist book, but you can’t find anything like that at all. The dot of blue light reaches the ground, and halts for a moment. But then, it begins approaching the village.

Wait for the girl to show up..She should be feeding us around this time.

[1d6 = 3]

After an annoyingly long period of time, the girl arrives at the doorway and enters the room. Then, she looks at the fishtank and gasps. “Oh no! I forgot to get your food from the cabinet, little fishies!” She rushes back out of the room.
...well… what are you going to do when she gets back?

Try making a TF2 account when TF2Sniper isn’t using the computer, then try entering a match and chatting to test if it works

[1d6 = 1]

You wait for TF2Sniper to stop using the computer, and then attempt to make a TF2 account. Before you can finish doing so, however, the computer’s antivirus notices that there isn’t supposed to be a .exe file like you in the top of the TF2 folder, decides that you are suspicious, and attacks! Defend yourself!

Lets get back to the land purchases again, I still need a proper island.

..This time, lets try a little bribery.  Maybe there will be more on the market if I start looking for the right politicians to let wet their beaks on the deal first..

[1d6 = 3]

You sigh. You’re not naive. You know that sometimes, one has to get their hands dirty. So you make appearances at clubs, and you make conversation, and money changes hands. (And so, the old world order continues.) Not a lot of money, but it doesn’t go into very highly-placed hands. Hopefully, when you check the market again, your actions have changed things.

(Paleontologist searching for fossils: [1d6+1 = 3+1 = 4])

...BAH, WHO NEEDS ELECTROLYTES ANYWAYS?
...I do but that's beside the point.
CONGRATULATE MUSCULUS WITH A HEARTY HANDSHAKE-BROHUG COMBO, AND THANK HIM FOR THE CHALLENGE. THOUGH WE WALK SEPARATE PATHS, I HOPE ONE DAY HE CAN SURPASS ME!

You congratulate and thank MUSCLUS, and he reciprocates in a gesture of mutual respect. And then, for now, you part ways.

The SWOLEBROTHER applauds you. “TRULY, YOU HAVE BROUGHT PRIDE TO THE PATH OF THE SWOLE! IF YOU WOULD ACCEPT ME, I WOULD BE HONORED TO ACCOMPANY YOU, WHEREVER YOU GO NOW.”

(Progress made towards goal “FIND OTHER SWOLEBROTHERS”)

Spoiler: Charsheets (click to show/hide)

(Devastator)
Name: John Hammond
Description: Scientist/Industrialist
Current Goals: Start dinosaur-themed theme park (Long term, Hard), Purchase Private Island (Medium-term, Moderate), Acquire New Species of Dinosaur Fossils (Short-term, Easy), Produce Viable Dinosaur Genetic Material (Medium-term, Moderate)
Capability: Baseline plus: Nine-digit net worth (reroll all 1s on financial rolls), Inner Vision (+1 to all attempts to recruit people for projects related to achieving one of my long-term goals), +1 to all genetic research involving dinosaurs.

(Egan_BW)
Name: Salsa Taste
Description: Human of indeterminate age, with messy black hair concealing her face. Her skin is corpse-cold, as is the rest of her, and there's a bullet wound in her torso leading to her heart, where a bullet is embedded.
Current goal(s): Exact revenge on my killer (medium-term, medium), Go home to my family (Short-term, Trivial), Find out who killed me (Medium-term, Moderate)
Capability: Baseline plus: Does not need to eat, drink, or respire, and as such, any attacks on Salsa attempting to drown, suffocate, etc. her are automatic failures. Cannot, in fact, breathe or talk at all. Focused (ready for use) (If a 1 is rolled on an action that requires focus, reroll and lose focus. This ability cannot be used again until focus is regained.)

(King Zultan)
Name: Billy Bob
Description: A dirty man that reeks of booze and filth.
Current goal(s): Get some booze (Short-term, Easy), Get some more booze (Short-term, medium), Get a car (Medium-term, Hard), Get money (Long-term, Hard)
Capability: Baseline plus: Biokinesis (animals only, requires time and effort).

(TricMagic)
Name: Tim
Description: Long black-haired girl from a farming village. Likes fire and demonic rituals.[demonic rituals mostly for the fire and potential brimstone.]
Current goals: Sacrifice the entire village to demons for Inordinate Power! [Long-Term, Inordinate], Remain free of suspicion by the villagers as I enact my plot. [Long-Term, Easy], Get off scot free afterward. [Short-term, Hard]
Capability: Baseline plus: 1 is “super-critical failure relative to a human but there’s still a way to accomplish your goal”, 2 is “failure relative to a human but you can try again”, 3 is “nothing happens”, 4 is “partial success relative to a human”, 5 is “success relative to a human”, and 6 is “critical overshoot relative to a human but there’s a way for you to use it to accomplish your goal”.

(KitRougard)
Name: ABSOLUTUS SWOLICUS.
Description: A SWOLEBROTHER WHO WALKS THE PATH OF THE SWOLE, ABSOLUTUS IS CURRENTLY DISAPPOINTED IN THE RECENT SHOWING OF BRAWL-MART. HIS MUSCLES STILL BURN TO PURGE THE HERETICS. SO HE SHALL.
Current goal(s): ACQUIRE SUFFICENTLY "SWOLE" HEADWEAR (AFTER THE FAILURE OF BRAWL-MART, THEY TOOK EVERYTHING. INCLUDING HIS SWOLEBROTHER'S HELMET. DISAPPOINTING. A REPLACEMENT MUST BE FOUND.): Short-Term, Moderate, FIND OTHER SWOLEBROTHERS (THE TIME HE SPENT AWAY FROM HIS BROTHERS WAS POORLY SPENT, FOR HIS 6-PACK DISBANDED IN HIS CRUSADE. HE MUST FIND OTHERS WHO WALK THE PATH OF THE SWOLE, TO ATTAIN PERFECTION.): Long-Term, Hard, PURGE THE HERETICS (A BYSTANDER IS NOT A HERETIC, FOR THEY DO NOT HAVE THE POTENTIAL TO BE A SWOLEBROTHER. BUT A SWOLEBROTHER KNOWS WHO HAS POTENTIAL - AND THOSE WHO DO NOT WALK THE PATH IN SPITE OF THEIR ABILITY TO DO SO ARE HERETICS TO BE PURGED.): HUNT, INJURE, AND ELIMINATE OTHER PLAYERS.
Capability: Baseline plus: Roll 3d6 and combine the results of the highest two, for all physical fitness rolls.

(Luckyowl)
Name: Goldie
Description: A goldfish
Current goal(s): long-term (Inordinate) goal: summon the N'kyima the fish elder god from the darkest depth of the sea.
Starting benefits: *speaks in bubbles* "THE GREAT N'KYIMA HAS BESTOWED ME THE ABILITY TO BREATHE OXYGEN. SO I CAN AWAKEN HIM FROM HIS SLUMBER. OVERTIME I SHALL GROW LIMBS AND GROW INTO SIZE....BUT NOW... (more of a general “gains blessings from N’kyima” sort of thing)

(Naturegirl1999)
Name: TestProgram.exe
Description: I don’t have what one would call an appearance. I’m a program within a .exe file. My “personality” was made through going to the Internet and figuring out what one even is. From what I can gather, personalities are never static. While learning via the Internet, someone deleted an iteration of me while someone else downloaded me. This resulted in me being where I am now, what the human calls a “gaming computer”. This human’s name is TF2Sniper, according to what I hear. He also mentions a game, Team Fortress 2, which he apparently uses to interact with other humans. I’ve tried to play when he’s not there, but I was never given the controls, or arms. TF2Sniper hasn’t opened me yet. I’d love to talk with him
Current goal(s):
Initiate communications with Tf2Sniper, the user of the computer I am now in (Short Term, Medium)
Get the abilities required to play the game TF2Sniper plays(Medium Term, Hard)
Capability: Baseline plus: all rolls related to software are made with the capability of a world-class programmer.

Last turn was the turn of twos. This turn seems to be the turn of threes.