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Author Topic: MKL21 Grand Prix-S1, R2: Choco Raceway (Turn 5-Mudslide!)  (Read 18124 times)

SuperDino85

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Re: MKL 21' Grand Prix-S1, R1: Luigis Waterway (Turn 5-Waaa Boosters Activated!)
« Reply #45 on: September 19, 2021, 08:59:33 pm »

Powerslide the outer curve!
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SirAston

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Re: MKL 21' Grand Prix-S1, R1: Luigis Waterway (Turn 5-Waaa Boosters Activated!)
« Reply #46 on: September 21, 2021, 02:48:45 am »

"... Off-beat."

Uses Ultra-Shroom, then Powerslides the INNER curve.
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Dwarmin

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MKL 21' Grand Prix-S1, R1: Luigis Waterway (Turn 6-Dangling over the death pit!)
« Reply #47 on: September 21, 2021, 11:46:14 am »

Luigi's Waterway - Turn Six

Waluigi, Jack Frost, and Olaf entering PURPLE!
PURPLE SEGMENT
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

All other racers entering RED!
RED SEGMENT
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
1st<---->8th
https://youtu.be/iFgrerDaAdo <--Track Mood Music
Player Action
Defensive driving WAAAAA!

"GO WALUIGI! GO WALUIGI! HAHAHA NOTHING CAN EVER STOP WALUIGI!!! WALUIGI GONNA WAAAAAA!"

Waluigi slows down and concentrates keeping his position! Not very bold of him, Bob! He gains +1 to pass checks, hazards and attacks!

Waluigi feels his 'performance' (this is actually just Waluigi) is catching the attention of sponsors who like amazing and outgoing drivers like him! He just needs a good placement to live up to the gloating, or all his boasting will make him from an outgoing race winner, into a sad clown loser. This has happened before.

Suddenly, he hears a fluttering noise behind him...uh oh! Cheaters!

Outer Curve, Power Slide.

Olaf, fearful of Crank and his shells, wisely swings around to the outer curve!

[6+1=7] Eager to break away from the pack, Olaf slides with all the grace of a drunken viking on a bobsled! Which as it turns out, is pretty well. +2 momentum and +1 to pass checks!

He looks back, and the last thing he sees is a scarred Blue Gloomba trying to headbutt him.

Olaf merely raises his mighty shield in response.

"Out of my way!"

Chompy had it out for Crank, for whatever reason.  Food for thought into the next lap.  But as for now...



Inside curve!  RAMMING SPEED!

"Out of my way!"

Crank bullies his way to the inside curve-Olaf retreats around to the outer curve, giving the Gloomba Racer a perfect chance to pass-but Cranks aggressiveness is legendary-instead, he angles his kart to crunch Olaf into the railing!

Crank takes a free pass attempt! Ram activates!

[4+7+2=13] vs [1+5=6]

Oh no! Cranks mighty gloomba headbutt ricochets off of the Vikings kart/boat as it hits the vikings mighty shield-without any apparent damage to either shield or kart, sending him into a spinout! He begins to inexorably slide into Weegee's watering hole! [6] (To avoid watery doom if...) [4] (To avoid spinning out from ram fail) Crank compensates, quickly-realigning his kart-kicking up sprays of dry mud as he gets back on the track!

Crank now resolves the free pass attempt!

[4+7=11] vs [6+5=11] Crank makes up as much ground as he can, but just before he can-Olaf has just hit the dash panel...he's gone!


Uses Ultra-Shroom, then Powerslides the INNER curve.

"... Off-beat."

Waking up from his dreams of edge guarding and and meteor smashing, Karate Joe aggressively power slides after Crank! But not before (depending on his preference) eating the Ultra Shroom or feeding it into Karts engine. It begins to rumble pleasantly, but something about it unnerves him...

[3] Joes kart beguns to sparkle with a Stardust Charge! He feels his engine just ticked up in power by quite a bit-His maximum momentum is increased by 1!

...

[1+1=2] Joe had calculated his flow to perfect timing with the ticks and thrums of his Kart engine-the recent power boost has now thrown off his beat! -1 momentum!

His kart begins to skid dangerously! [2] Joe recovers his traction just before skidding over the side-balancing on two wheels, he manuevers his kart back onto the track!

Having barely saved himself, he's still in no position to catch up to Crank-who almost fell into the drink himself.

Go for the shortcut!

Jack makes a hard left turn, straight into Weegees Watering Hole! While this would normally be (career) suicide, he has a cheep in stock!

Jack angles his Kart down the slope, building up speed as it becomes dangerously slick, and hops at the last moment-grabbing hold of the Green Cheep in the back of his Kart and holding it aloft! It struggles to escape and flutters its tiny wings powerfully, giving Jack the few seconds of vital airtime he needs to pass over the pit!

Star-Camera bulbs flash from the stands, freezing the moment in history, as Jack Frost makes the jump!

Jack feels his performance so far will respond favorably to sponsors-they love racers who defy 'convention' and 'self restraint' and do interesting things on track rather than just spam aggressive driving. He just needs a good finish too!

As Jack angles down to the track with a big bounce, the cheep finally wiggles away and drops down into the watering hole with a splash. He wastes no time in committing to a forward path, now right on Waluigis tail! Seems the purple plumber was arrogant and didn't try building up any distance...

Jack has pulled ahead! Jack has taken second!

Jack has to slow down his Kart with a slam on the breaks-the momentum just about carried him over the wall! -1 momentum!

Powerslide the outer curve!

Bowser has less to worry about from the front of the pack-eager to get up MORE SPEED, he wisely sticks to the outside curve and the dash panel!

[5+1=6] Bowser moves forward in a brutal slide! Seeing the other racers goofing around the death pit, he decides to take a more confident turn and gains +1 momentum and +1 to pass checks!


Although Diddy advises the senior Kong to drive defensively to maximize his chances of hitting the all-important item box, for some reason the old geezer still thinks enough of his driving skill to Power Slide to the Inside, setting himself up for an amazing rise- or catastrophic fall!

Go for an Item Box, Pop Pop! You need one now if you don't want to fall too far behind!
I don't just need an item, I need to close some distance! No choice, Junior, I need to risk it for the banana bread biscuit!

[6+1=7] Apparently he hasn't lost all his skill-perhaps remembering his days in the original Mario kart (even if these memories weren't real), Cranky Kong hits the bricks like a cheese smuggler outrunning the Wiseguy patrol!

+2 momentum and +1 to pass checks!

Diddy is keeping a close eye on various social media metrics, such as twitcher, ticktock, bananagram and barrelrollr. It seems the crowd is really enjoying the track side banter between him and Cranky-more people on tuning into the MKL pit radio every minute to listen in. This could lead to some lucrative sponsor deals if they get out of the back of the pack!

....
Rotom downloading Skill.PNG...1%/100% completed...

Action: Rotom uses defensive driving!

Movement phase
Bowser and Olaf hit the outer curves dash panel! +1 momentum! Olaf is BLAZING!

...

Waluigi sees pools of glistening cheep cheep slime over the track in front of him! Disgusting! Waa! Good thing he wore his plumbers uniform!

Waluigi hits the dash panel and gains +1 momentum! He's got the road ahead all to himself! Nobody can stop him! Now!

[1+1=2] Like a tomato from the Gods hitting him in the face, Waluigi strikes a huge puddle of cheep goo, not because of anything he did, or because he wasn't paying attention to the track, or thinking about all the coins he could make from a sponsorship, but because the CHEATING CHEEP CHEEPS PLACED IT THERE ON PURPOSE TO SABOTAGE HIM WAAAAAAAA!

Waluigi takes 1 momentum loss!

Waluigi is fuming, so he doesn't notice the giant Chomp wiggling around it's chain eagerly.

[Auto-pass with green cheep]

But the terrible scent of green cheep (Chain chomps can smell?) causes Chompy to lose interest. Lucky for Waluigi!

...

The racers begin to fight for position!

Rotom beeps in low power mode, and uses defensive driving-if they can't catch up, at least they can keep from falling back.

Cranky Kong fears no plumber, and no shells! He aims to pass King Koopa!

And he succeeds! Cranky Kong fakes out The Old Lizard-he knows from history, King Koopa has always had some trouble gauging trajectory. Cranky Kong then sets his path-seemingly set and as predicted, as Bowser taps his breaks for a split second, to send his kart and shield of shells careening into the Old Kong without losing much speed. But Cranky had already hop turned to the furthest edge of the inside curve-with the barest of inches between them (Cranky feels a whirring green shell split one of the few remaining hairs on his head) he shoots past, leaving Bowser fuming!

As least he would have, if he had gone to the outside lane. Instead the old Kong drifts to the inside!

Bowser is somewhat flabbergasted Cranky didn't try to pass him just now. Still-now on the tail of the front of the pack, he's only a koopa shell from catching up! Maybe now he can ignore the Old Monkey...

Joe and Crank are recovering from their near disasters and in no position to move past Olaf-in fact, the racers in behind have made up a lot of ground!

Olaf is ready to pull ahead! The entire pack is waiting for him to break out so they can draft behind him!

Jack Frost lands in the red section of the track with a satisfying thunk, and sees a wonderful sight-the Twitchy Purple Guy is spinning all over the track, having ran into a bunch of fishy slime puddles-clearing a nice path through the hazards that might have made Jacks landing a bit tougher, or even sent him skittering over the walls into the river. How polite of him! Maybe you should pay him back with a POW Box? Or settle for just passing the wildly spinning racer!

[5+3+1=9] vs [3+3=6]

Jack just can't make up the distance before Waluigi straightens his Kart out!

Waluigi is concentrating on holding off the cheating Snowcone who illegally jumped over the track and does not pull ahead! Waa~!

...

Olaf hits the juice!

[6-6+8=8]

Olaf, taking full advantage of his amazing power slide, times a perfect speed boost and pulls ahead, blazing over the finish line and completing his first lap! He burns a lot of speed to do so, losing 4 momentum! But he's still faster than everyone ahead of him-time to get back 1st place!

Crank has carefully preserved his momentum-seeing Olaf break out into the next segment, he aims to follow him!

[1-6+5=0]

But the Viking is in no mood to provide an easy draft ahead-he blows ahead of Cranks kart before he can even get close. His kart deathrattles dangerously...but nothing happens-he feels as if these last few moments could have been a LOT worse. Can't help but feel a boo just floated over his grave.

Cleanup phase

In all the excitement, item boxes beckon...

[4] Crank the Gloomba manages to snag one, in fact...

[3] The same box Joe was aiming for!

[6] Cranky the Kong also manages to get an item box! Let's hope it was worth losing that cool move.

Crank the Gloomba watches his loot readout spin... [5] Blooper... It's only of middling value on this track due to the constant dash panels, but if he wants to contest another inside curve-it should come quite in handy for getting a replacement item.

The Gloomba Karter suddenly has a flashback to his first race here-he recalls that King Harkinian must have hit a half dozen bloopers or more over the course of the race, as he wasted no time in dousing the track over and over again. For many racers, the smell of Blooper ink on that day was inexorably linked with memories of the terrible kings haunting laughter.

"OOOAAAHHHH HOH HOH HOH HOH HOH!"

"OOOAAAHHHH HOH HOH HOH HOH HOH!"

Cranky the Kong also waits 'patiently' for his item, perhaps banging on the dashboard a few times [4] It pops out yet another triple green shell, which begin swirling around his rickety kart hypnotically, like a ceiling fan at the old folks treehouse.

...

Leading pack!
  1st Place!!! (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKPErdLxFW8)
Momentum- 3
Items-[Special:Green Cheep]
2nd Place!!
Momentum- 3
Items-[Reserve:POW Block]
3rd Place!
Momentum- 4
Items-[Active: Robotic Shield (3/3)Charges][Special:Green Cheep]

Trailing pack!
4th Place!
Momentum- 5
Items-[Dragged:Triple Green Shell (3/3)Shells][Reserve: Blooper]
5th Place...!
Momentum- 4
Items-None
6th Place.
Momentum- 4
Items-[Dragged:Triple Green Shell (3/3)Shells]
7th Place...?
Momentum- 4
Items-[Dragged:Triple Green Shell (3/3)Shells]
8th Place... (https://youtu.be/fCiHSZzuwdc) Does anyone have a full restore?
Momentum- 3
Items- None

Spoiler: Racer Info (click to show/hide)

...

Amazing racing!

And terrible racing!

You need all sorts of vegetables to make a stew, Bob!

We've got racers in two packs now. Waluigi is sputtering in 1st, with Jack on his tail-and Olaf steadily gaining on both of them. They're entering the purple section, but Chompy doesn't seem as eager to attack this time-two racers have green cheeps, which Chompy doesn't like the taste of, and Jack is Chompys new little friend. Still...

Jack has the option to take a shortcut across Chompys yard now without being attacked-which could get the 1st position if he can manage the terrain, which is pretty flat, but covered in Kart shrapnel. Still, it's little risk for him, but less reward-item boxes and dash panels beckon on the other lanes.

The other racers are entering red, a straightforward section-Chompy won't bother them with racers occupying his attention in purple. But can we expect some serious shell action? I hope so!

4 Red cheeps have flitted onto the track, and they've dropped more slime!

Red Cheeps are of more value now that Chompy expects them-any racers who enter in the next segment without the 'toll' will have to be extra careful!
« Last Edit: September 22, 2021, 07:15:40 pm by Dwarmin »
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Fluffe9911

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Re: MKL 21' Grand Prix-S1, R1: Luigis Waterway (Turn 3-Ol Chompys Revenge)
« Reply #48 on: September 21, 2021, 12:21:49 pm »

"NO FAIR! WHY EVERYONE HAVE IT OUT FOR WALUIGI!?!? NOT ONLY DO FISH TRY TO SABOTAGE WALUIGI'S VICTORY BUT CHEATERS TELEPORTED BEHIND WALUIGI WHILE WALUIGI WASNT LOOKING! THATS IT NO MORE DEFENSIVE DRIVING TIME TO SHOW THESE CHEATERS WHAT IT MEANS TO WAAAAAAAA!" Inner Circle, Power Slide... Again! WAAAAAAA!!! 
« Last Edit: September 21, 2021, 12:28:02 pm by Fluffe9911 »
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Egan_BW

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Re: MKL 21' Grand Prix-S1, R1: Luigis Waterway (Turn 5-Waaa Boosters Activated!)
« Reply #49 on: September 21, 2021, 12:26:05 pm »

"Hee ho hello funny purple man! Just taking the inner curve? Why not cut it closer? Why not see where your true ambition takes you?"
Jack places a hand on the Zorro's Rapier, attempting to channel some of that item's fell power into the POW block.
Hit the shortcut! Slam-dunk the POW into chompy's stump!
« Last Edit: September 21, 2021, 02:22:37 pm by Egan_BW »
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Fluffe9911

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Re: MKL 21' Grand Prix-S1, R1: Luigis Waterway (Turn 5-Waaa Boosters Activated!)
« Reply #50 on: September 21, 2021, 12:30:27 pm »

"Hee ho hello funny purple man! Just taking the inner curve? Why not cut it closer? Why not see where your true ambition takes you?"
"Sorry ice-cream cone! Waluigi is too busy WINNING to take advice from stinky CHEATERS right now! Please try again after you are done eating Waluigi's dust! WAAAAAAAA!"
« Last Edit: September 21, 2021, 12:33:45 pm by Fluffe9911 »
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Egan_BW

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Re: MKL 21' Grand Prix-S1, R1: Luigis Waterway (Turn 5-Waaa Boosters Activated!)
« Reply #51 on: September 21, 2021, 01:01:17 pm »

"Hee, your loss stinky purple man. See you later."
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Devastator

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Outer Ring, Draft!  Bah!  Olaf will catch you, tiny man!  And you, skinny Waaaaa! man!
« Last Edit: September 21, 2021, 03:15:19 pm by Devastator »
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SuperDino85

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Fire a green shell at Joe, and try to catch a red cheep this time
« Last Edit: September 22, 2021, 01:11:55 am by SuperDino85 »
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Toaster

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  That didn't work.  New plan.

Fire all three shells across into the GREEN segment, right before the dash panel!  Fire the blooper!

Aggressive Driving!  Got to pull ahead!

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HMR stands for Hazardous Materials Requisition, not Horrible Massive Ruination, though I can understand how one could get confused.
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SirAston

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Aggressive Driving.
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monk12

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Re: MKL 21' Grand Prix-S1, R1: Luigis Waterway (Turn 5-Waaa Boosters Activated!)
« Reply #56 on: September 22, 2021, 08:47:33 pm »

Cranky Kong's daring maneuver pays off as his slide carries him through the item boxes, and just as the engines reach their critical limit, the Speedy Pete darts forward, making up lost ground!

Pop Pop, you're blowing up!
What do you mean! I timed that Power Slide perfectly, consarnit!
You're not blowing up on the course, you old ape, you're blowing up on social media! Everyone in DK Land has been watching MKL ever since the Diddy Kong Circuit went defunct, but there's never been a Kong driver in MKL before. Until now, that is- they're all rooting for you!
But I'm at the back of the pack! I don't think there's even anyone in the Kart behind me!
Doesn't matter, Pop Pop! You're trending on every major platform- it seems you're the crotchety old man everyone wishes they were!

Cranky Kong has a hard time believing this- in fact, he typically complains that "the interweb" is a symptom of the newest generation's degeneracy- but the whole reason he came to race was to show the younguns how it was done, and if they're really watching, then now's the time!

The Speedy Pete comes out of the curve right on the bumper of Bowser, who is himself snaking just behind Joe and Crank. Knowing that his old DKC Kart is a bit smaller and more streamlined than the larger MKL Karts, he slides into the slipstream of the racers ahead, hoping to Draft and make a move up the board! Just as the incremental boost from the draft kicks in, he fires 2 of his 3 shells forward to clear the way!

Dwarmin

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Re: MKL 21' Grand Prix-S1, R1: Luigis Waterway (Turn 7-Mid Race Massacre)
« Reply #57 on: September 23, 2021, 01:37:33 pm »

Luigi's Waterway - Turn Seven

Everybody else entering PURPLE!
PURPLE SEGMENT
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Waluigi, Jack Frost, and Olaf entering GREEN!
GREEN SEGMENT
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
1st<---->8th
https://youtu.be/iFgrerDaAdo <--Track Mood Music
Player Action

"Hee ho hello funny purple man! Just taking the inner curve? Why not cut it closer? Why not see where your true ambition takes you?"

"Sorry ice-cream cone! Waluigi is too busy WINNING to take advice from stinky CHEATERS right now! Please try again after you are done eating Waluigi's dust! WAAAAAAAA!"

"Hee, your loss stinky purple man. See you later."

Waluigi, Jack, and Olaf get inked!
The Ground Rumbles-POW block!

...

Inner Circle, Power Slide... Again! WAAAAAAA!!!

"NO FAIR! WHY EVERYONE HAVE IT OUT FOR WALUIGI!?!? NOT ONLY DO FISH TRY TO SABOTAGE WALUIGI'S VICTORY BUT CHEATERS TELEPORTED BEHIND WALUIGI WHILE WALUIGI WASNT LOOKING! THATS IT NO MORE DEFENSIVE DRIVING TIME TO SHOW THESE CHEATERS WHAT IT MEANS TO WAAAAAAAA!"

As if to prove Waluigis point succinctly, at that point a flying squid soars over him, spewing sticky ink (again, good thing he wore his plumbing uniform, waa) all over his windshield-and the Earth begins to shake as the POW block the freeze pop just used begins to rumble the earth. Cheaters!

Inked! -1 to hazard, driving, and pass checks until the end of the next turn!

Waluigi remembers what the The Colonel said you should try to do in this situation, in the rookie karter initiation video...


Quote
You see this here, soldier? Pay close attention. It's a POW block. It's a tectonic geo-weapon, producing shockwaves with enough power to send you flying-combined with other modes of attack, it can end your mission in failure-next stop, Leavenworth prison.

It's effective range is for your purposes, technically infinite. Anywhere on the track, anyone on the track, you'll have to prepared to deal with its effects. There's no way outside of absolute invulnerability to defend against it, at least directly. But, it's got a certain weakness you can exploit. Your sneaking suit...er, kart is equipped with hydraulic mechanisms that allow you to traverse obstacles and quickly realign yourself on the track by jumping-and the POW block can only damage a kart if its touching the ground. So time your jump at just the right moment, and the shock wave will pass under harmlessly. Careful, though-you'll only get one shot.
Hazard check vs POW [4-1=3]

He tries to time his kart like the video said, to hop just at the right time to avoid the POW...but his hydraulics lock up from the Blooper Ink-his kart stays stubbornly glued to the track as the rattling in his instruments quickly approaches catastrophe. The cheaters are now coordinating against him! Waluigis Kart is flipped into the air, just not in the way he would have preferred!

-2 Momentum!

He desperately tries to align his kart to go into a power slide when he lands!
[3-1=2] It doesn't work.

Waluigi? What happened? Waluigi?! Waaaaaaaaa!


Hit the shortcut! Slam-dunk the POW into chompy's stump!

Jack places a hand on the Zorro's Rapier, attempting to channel some of that item's fell power into the POW block-with a perfectly timed hydraulic jump (Jack didn't watch the initiation video OR read the rules, hee) he leaps into the air and dumps his POW right on Chompys stump!

-2 HP!

Chomp stumps are, for some reason, designed to take around 3 hits to collapse-the POW block goes through two hits, easily, sending the vibrations rumbling through the Earth. Jack is treated to the pleasant music of Waluigi screaming as his kart is tossed into the air, rising to a crescendo as the shock wave rolls through the entire racing pack.

Chompy's chain is now affixed by the barest of stumps, hardly more than a log chair.

Jack hits the ground running, his mood ebullient! Only to see the oddest thing coming after him-the flying thing that just visited Waluigi. Turns out it's some sort of squid?

It shoots a huge glob of ink at his kart, dousing him through-he looks like Black Frost now!

Jack can even hear the creatures voice chattering away with all the energy of someone who just broke out of a prison cell and is railing against the nearest stand in for an authority figure.


Personality [2] Irritable!
<~Bloop!~ Take this, ya little chump! Boom, inkshot! Owned! Yeah, I bet ya think ya can get away from anything, huh? Ya can weasel out of any  consequences for your actions? WELL TODAYS NOT THAT DAY PAL! I got your purple friend-and now I got you! Go drive off a short pier, buddy, anytime-I'll be waiting for you when you hit the water! Go ~bloop!~ yourself!>

The Squid punctuates this by flying off in Olafs direction with a determined air. Well.

Inked! -1 to hazard, driving, and pass checks until the end of the next turn!

Jack nevertheless, tries to compensate for his now sticky controls-weaving through the Kart graveyard Chompy has created and gaining ground on Waluigi-who seems to be suffering the same ailment and then some.

Jack takes a free pass attempt on Waluigi!
[3+1-1=3] vs [2+3-1=4]

Jack is near about to careen into a giant pile of Gloomba blue metal, before Ol' Chompy gently lifts him up and place him on the other side of the obstruction-leaving a clear path to the track! His kart skids slightly as it transfers from dirt to pavement, losing a bit of speed (-1 momentum)...but,

Jack Frost takes 1st place!

Jack feels a wonderful sense of freedom as he breaks clear-he gains +1 to pulling ahead! Unfortunately, even with the distance, he's not going to be able to pull ahead...still, with all the carnage going on the track behind him, which he can now see is extensive nobody else is likely to either. Hee hee! Ho ho!

Outer Ring, Draft!
"Bah! Olaf will catch you, tiny man!  And you, skinny Waaaaa! man!"

Olaf had set his own Kart to draft off of Jack, who was heading through Chompys yard-hoping he could use the resulting speed boost to swing around the outer curve before the frozen treat was too far ahead to follow safely. Of course, that was when he too was hit with what felt like a combination of an incoming avalanche, and a flying octopus of some sort. Blekksprut! He fires a sticky ball of ink at his kart rudely! The shield does nothing!
Inked! -1 to hazard, driving, and pass checks until the end of the next turn!

Hazard check vs POW [4-1=3]
-2 momentum!

Olaf is unable to respond in time to this effective one two-punch. His kart, which has remained roughly invulnerable to speed loss up til now, is flipped upside down-he's forced to skid along the track the wrong way up with his shield! He changes his lane to try and draft the wildly careening Waluigi!

Upside down. Riding on his shield. Driving after a purple plumber. While covered in Blekksprut. Some days are more interesting than others for a viking. Wait til he tells his brothers about this!

Olaf takes a free pass attempt on Waluigi!
[6+1-1=6] vs [2+2-1=3]

Feeling sort of ridiculous, Olaf opts to right himself as he sees Waluigis berserk flailing, rather than crash into a wall. With a heft of shield, still untouched, he turns Kart right upside again.

  That didn't work.  New plan.

Fire all three shells across into the GREEN segment, right before the dash panel!  Fire the blooper!

Aggressive Driving!  Got to pull ahead!


Finally, we get to the Gloomba responsible for most of the mayhem at the front of the pack-he sees his blooper wreaking havoc and hits the gas pedal-aggression is the only way to win! He punctuates this by frenetically firing three shells over the small grass divider leading into the green segment, where they fall into the track and begin bouncing around-creating a deadly shell barricade.

[4] Crank powers forward, his kart gaining 1 momentum! He also gains a penalty to hazard checks...

Crank has always preferred a quiet air of competence to clowning around, like that purple Luigi up there. Sponsors who prefer sure bets to long shots-like his old employer-tend to value drivers like him. Drivers who can deliver and don't come with baggage. His placement speaks well of his ability to keep up with the pack-now he just has to break out and seize the glory awaiting. Sponsors also like an underdog story. An unexpected, come from behind win, where you get knocked down but you keep getting back up again. Crank will understand better in a few seconds.

...Now that he thinks of it, maybe a bit too much havoc at the front. Actually, the rattling of his instruments has increased a pitch too far, increasing to a steady whine, and that can only mean...

Hazard check vs POW [3-1=2]
-2 momentum!

POW! Crank barely has time to respond as his controls lock up and his kart begins to flip-indicating he's just waited a second too long to avoid a POW block. His speed is still quite high, however, due to aggressive driving-even as he crashes back down to the track with a rattling thump that he feels all the way up to his mushroom cap, his Kart is still moving at a steady clip.

He hears a familiar whirring noise behind him-just like the green shells he just fired, another one has been launched. Well, it's to be expected, but it's far behind. He hears another set of shells launched even further back, and maybe thats what lowers his guard. Because, what is not to be expected is what he sees in his rearview mirror-as the shells bounce through the track, weaving with diabolical intent through both Bowser and Joe, steadily homing in on him!

Crank cuts to one side desperately, but his speed...he can't slow down in time to dodge...both...

[1-1=0] vs [3] (Cranky Green Shell vs Crank)

-2 momentum!
HICCUP GAINED!
Deathrattle kicks in!
[2][14]Module Hiccups: Low Loot, Cold Start!
[18][Kart Hiccup: Deathrattle] (Jeez!)

A green shell that smells vaguely of bananas slams into the side of his kart, wedging itself right under his left wheel, continuing to spin, throwing off pieces of kart metal all over the track. A veteran racer, Crank knows this is absolutely one of the worst things that can happen. He reacts quickly, and in the only way he can, which is to mash on the breaks and limit the damage by crushing it under his kart. For a moment, he thinks he might be clear...then that deathrattle he's been hearing for the whole race kicks in!

As Crank rattles back onto the track, he quickly takes stock of the damage with his onboard star-puter. If a Gloomba can frown even deeper, Crank might. His kart has suffered some serious damage.

...

His high acceleration module has been beaten to hell-it melted the luck circuits that were already acting faulty earlier in the race with his green triple shell spinning the wrong way-the ensuing carnage has now damaged them semi-permanently and fused them with his High AC module, resulting in an inevitable loss to both. In racer terms, Low loot. The module is also causing a minute fire leak in his rocket booster, probably a shard of shell that pierced one of the stardust tubes. He calculates this is not, in fact, the worse thing that could have happened-it's not something he has to worry about right now. His high acceleration module should even partially account for it. But he's not going to be 'getting out of bed' in the morning with it installed and will suffer Cold Starts.

Crank is puzzled by the next readouts. Technically, everything is fine. Everything is in working order.

But he can hear that horrible deathrattle has now migrated from just his module, to his entire kart. He can feel the thrum of bad luck coming off in waves, just waiting to be unleashed. Worse now. The boo floating over his grave...

There's a few ways to handle that, one of the easier ones is the pit stop-get it fixed now, before it becomes a permanent issue. But that'll cost time. And he's not sure if he can spend that time.

Not if he wants to win. For now, Crank dives under his dash to commit some desperately needed repairs.

Aggressive Driving.

Joe is trying to find the flow again, that perfect rhythm, but in this world there is only dissonance...putting himself to the test, however, is the only way to gain strength.

[6] Joe finds the flow, his kart gaining 3 momentum! He also gains a -1 penalty to hazard checks, but that's a small price to pay, surely...

Hazard check vs POW [5-1=4]

Joe felt the discordant rumbling in the Earths bones far before any of the other racers, despite the increased speed drawing his attention. He's already grown attuned to the strange symphony he feels deep under his feet, a steady grinding of great stone plates-music it would require eons to hear complete. This sound was as if a plate was suddenly dropped to the floor. Once he understood this, evading the POW was simply a matter...of timing.

His kart clears the air above the shockwave with only a little difficulty, and he lands with no issue. Perfect.

Then, as soon as he hits the track, a green shell wangs into him from behind.

[6] vs [1-1=0]  (Bowser fires a green shell at joe)
-2 momentum!

Joe feels the shell coming toward his head. Just like the thousands of pots his master threw at him. Summoning all the power of the FLOW, he reaches out and...One! Two! Hit three! Kicks it away with Punch punch KAPOW! It goes flying into the horizon!

Armor shell blocks Hiccup!

He simultaneously feels his rhythmic shell shatter under the strain of acclimating to such a chaotic universe. Notes of the purest music float out wistfully.

All things pass.

At least the destruction of the device has also stopped the Signal Interference, though he supposes only this world would view perfect harmony as 'interference'. Guess he's going to get more acclimated to this world than he thought...

...

While he is recovering, two more green shells fly past him in a perfect arc. Most curious.

Dissonance...


Fire a green shell at Joe, and try to catch a red cheep this time

Bowser wastes no time firing a shell at the opponent ahead of him-he has three, after all! Cunningly, the Koopa King waits til the strange being has landed after an oddly graceful jump-the moment where a kart loses that fine tuned control.

[6] vs [1-1=0]  (attack roll vs joe)

Bwahaha! Bowser is about to send grey face flying! He only wishes he had fired more shells! It's a bit ruined as Joe Karate kicks the shell into the distant horizon, but still. He can't keep doing that, right?

[3] Bowser punctuates this attack, by happily slowing down and grabbing a red cheep from the air, and gulping it down. Mmmm! A tasty snack! ...Wait, he was supposed to keep it? Oh well. There's already more jumping on the track... -1 momentum!

Hey, whats that rumbling noise?

Hazard check vs POW [2]

As Bowser flies into the air from the POW block, he finally realizes that was why Thwomp-man had jumped. Well, it makes total sense now! -2 momentum!

Bowsers kart flattens like a pancake as it hits the track, and worse, it sends his green shells flying off his kart! Well, now to think of it, they're behind him, so who cares? If anything it was a benefit!

Hey, whats that whirring noise?

Oh, I guess it was nothing. For some reason the Old Monkey fired two green shells to either side of him. Weird.

Cranky Kong's daring maneuver pays off as his slide carries him through the item boxes, and just as the engines reach their critical limit, the Speedy Pete darts forward, making up lost ground!

Cranky Kong has a hard time believing this- in fact, he typically complains that "the interweb" is a symptom of the newest generation's degeneracy- but the whole reason he came to race was to show the younguns how it was done, and if they're really watching, then now's the time!

The Speedy Pete comes out of the curve right on the bumper of Bowser, who is himself snaking just behind Joe and Crank. Knowing that his old DKC Kart is a bit smaller and more streamlined than the larger MKL Karts, he slides into the slipstream of the racers ahead, hoping to Draft and make a move up the board! Just as the incremental boost from the draft kicks in, he fires 2 of his 3 shells forward to clear the way!


Pop Pop, you're blowing up!
What do you mean! I timed that Power Slide perfectly, consarnit!
You're not blowing up on the course, you old ape, you're blowing up on social media! Everyone in DK Land has been watching MKL ever since the Diddy Kong Circuit went defunct, but there's never been a Kong driver in MKL before. Until now, that is- they're all rooting for you!
But I'm at the back of the pack! I don't think there's even anyone in the Kart behind me!
Doesn't matter, Pop Pop! You're trending on every major platform- it seems you're the crotchety old man everyone wishes they were!

Cranky locks in on Bowsers quite large slipstream, and ques up two shells to fire-what happens next is a bit confusing. His shells go forward in a whirring arc. Bowser fires his own shell at Joe and hits. Joe karate kicks the shell with enough momentum to carry it out of low orbit and send it flying to the moon. The entire track jumps all at once. Bowsers shells go flying off the back of his kart, bouncing crazily and in Cranky Kongs general direction. Also there was a flying squid that looked really rude that dived into the river. But first...

[1] vs [1] (vs Bowser)
[6] vs [5] (vs Bowser)

[6-1=5] vs [3] (vs Joe)
[5-1=4] vs [4] (vs Joe)

[5-1=4] vs [4] (vs Crank)
[1-1=0] vs [3] (vs Crank)

Crankys eyesight causes him to see multiple Bowsers-he aims at the ones on the edges, but both of them miss. Oh well. Also looks they miss Joe! And one of the last shells misses Crank. But the very last shell...well, that was a good one. Looks like he wanged that arrogant Blue 'Shroom right good and proper.

Cranky will probably pretend that he intended that all along.

Hazard check vs POW [5]

The Old Ape feels a light rumbling underneath his kart, almost unnoticed above his karts usually rickety rocking movement. It's pleasant, sort of relaxing actually! DK Country karts are, among other things, built specifically to hold together under heavy strain-a paradoxical technological counter developed due to their imprecise methods of hammering and welding. This combined with the extreme range from the POW block means his kart barely jumps a foot. No sweat.

He lines up his kart to blow past the Dinosaur King, or whatever. Time to make his alternate reality, actual reality!

Cranky Kong takes a free pass attempt on Bowser!
[3+1=4] vs [5+4+1=10]

Cranky rejects that reality, and makes a better one! He blows by Bowser, taking 6th! He loses NO MOMENTUM! And gains ONE MOMENTUM!

Finally, this is what the banana spoiler was designed for! Cranky feels his kart move into that perfect spot-where he barely feels any wind resistance at all-he picks up speed and swings around Bowser easily! His spoiler keeps him from losing speed, which allows him to gun it even further, building up enough momentum to rocket forward!

Now, that's what they call a golden banana.

....
Rotom downloading Skill.PNG...2%/100% completed...

Action: Rotom uses defensive driving!
Hazard check vs POW [4+1=5]

Beep boop, auto-stabilization engaged!

Movement phase
Crank, Cranky Kong, Bowser, Joe and Rotom hit the broad dash panel in various states! +1 Momentum

Olaf also hits the Dash panel! in his own segment! Does he break out into a smile as the blooper ink is burned off?

In the red segment
After all Crank has suffered, a lowly puddle of cheep slime hardly seems an issue. [4] He swerves around with a scowl.

Joe, on the other hand [2] slides right into it. -1 Momentum helpfully cleaning the way for the rest of the racers.

Cranky Kong is facing a situation weirdly like that of Crank the Gloomba, having two shells roaring at him from a direction he didn't expect them from.[5] But age trumps experience, don't they say? Well, some people say that. Cranky slips between the deadly shells, smooth as peeling a banana with his feet.

Rotom [2+1=3] is not so fortunate-one of the shells blasts into the pokemon, sending them askew, and the other goes flying into the previous segment to remain an annoyance. -2 momentum

In the purple segment
Chompy, nearly forgotten in all this, eyes two tasty prizes-a lanky piece of purple taffy, and a plump meatball with a crunchy breading. But both of them has nasty green cheeps too...but they didn't give HIM ANY RED CHEEPS LIKE THE NICE ICE-CREAM MAN!

Waluigi has been banged, flipped, and inked, is he about to get chomped? [6+1-1=6] vs [6-2=4] Thankfully not.

Olaf is being eyed next... [1+2-1=2] vs [2-2=0]  Olaf is also spared-it seems Chompy chose to help Jack get past the barricade, over attacking. Maybe there's a lesson in that...he notices Chompy getting increasingly agitated all the same, possibly because chomping Karts is in his nature. And it's hard to deny ones nature even for a friend.

Olaf can't help but witness as he passes by as Chompys chain explodes into shards of raining metal. Well, that's also a lesson! ...Maybe you should drive a bit faster...

-1 HP

Chompy is free!

...

The racers begin to fight for position. I mean, the ones that are alive.

Rotom is blissfully untouched by the chaos of the outside world, and coasts forward in absolutely serenity at the back of the race.

Bowser is not sure what happened, but Cranky Kong is now way too far ahead of him to do anything about it.

Cranky Kong is having a great turn, really. He sees Karate Joes eyes widen as he approaches to attempt a pass-maybe, just a bit. That grey fellow is hard to read.

[6+5=11] vs [6+6=12]
Every Ape has his day! Joe's slide on the cheep grease was just the smallest edge Cranky Kong needs to cleanly pass him.

Cranky Kong rolls into 5th, at the cost of one momentum!

Then, Cranky spots a cranky looking Crank ahead of him, rapidly cranking a crank, to fix his cranking kart. Well, this is awkward...a single green shell still spins around the Kongs kart, almost as if in silent mockery of the Gloomba.

[6+3=9] vs [2+5=7]

Crank the Gloomba abruptly abandons his hasty repairs to contest Cranky the Kong-and even with his opponents kart trailing metal shards, stardust, gas fumes, and lucksparks-the Old Ape just can't get past him! The Gloomba weaves back and forth like a snake, spoiling the Apes attempt to gain a clean draft, even if it slows him down too! This might require some finesse...

Joe was looking to pass Crank the Gloomba himself, before the Monkey passed him-now he's stuck smelling banana scented exhaust, unable to pass!

Crank the Gloomba has no chance to pull ahead...but by the Grotto, neither does that Old Ape.

...

Olaf draft was spoiled-so he'll just have to pass Waaaaa~ man the old fashioned way!

[2+1=3] vs [1+3=4]

Hah! Olaf reclaims 2nd place! His kart burns off a little more speed (-1 momentum) so he can't catch the ice pop! Not yet, anyway!

Waluigi finally controls his spinout-Olaf is receding in the distance like a viking longboat fleeing to the sea after sacking a monastery. He looks at his own reflection in the water for a moment. It can't end like this. He also notices the vanity plate tagged to the front of his kart reading [TOO BAD]. Yes. Too bad. FOR THEM! WAAAAAAA!

...
Jack doesn't have momentum to pull ahead!

Nobody has enough momentum to pull ahead!

Cleanup phase

Walugi turns to see if he was knocked past the item boxes. Waa?

[3] Yes.

Waaaaa....

Cheep snatching!
[4] Crank may be battered, beaten, and bruised. But he got a Red Cheep Cheep somewhere in that mess.
[3] Cranky Kong forgets why he even needs fish!
[3] Joe will not sully the Flow with...fish.
[2] Bowser grabs another red cheep and eats it. Tasty!
[2] *Rotom Rejection Form Filed*

Correction: A shell flies into purple segment, but Chompy eats it. The end.
...

Leading pack!
1st Place!!! (https://youtu.be/y_3mbCzJPJI) (A personal favorite of mine!)
Momentum- 2
Items-None
2nd Place!!
Momentum- 2
Items-[Active: Robotic Shield (3/3)Charges][Special:Green Cheep]
3rd Place!
Momentum- 1
Items-[Special:Green Cheep]


Trailing pack!
4th Place!
Momentum- 3
Items-[Special:Red Cheep]
5th Place..
Momentum- 5
Items-[Dragged:Triple Green Shell (1/3)Shells]
6th Place...!
Momentum- 5
Items-None
7th Place...?
Momentum- 2
Items-None
8th Place... (https://youtu.be/fCiHSZzuwdc) Does anyone have a full restore?
Momentum- 2
Items- None

Spoiler: Racer Info (click to show/hide)

...

Well that was...

AMAZING!

WONDERFUL!

The sponsors are lighting up the boards! The crowd is going crazy...are we back, Jim?

I'm thinking we're BACK, Bob!

...

And it's only the half way point!

The trailing pack is now pulling into purple with...a now freed Ol' Chompy!

He's sort of sniffing around-hasn't moved much! Our resident Chompologist says he's likely to fixate on the first thing that annoys him. Like kart racers!

Track Lakitus are gathering...they say we can get him under control in about four turns. Who knows what he'll do before then! Should be fun to watch!

The other racers are entering green-they'll have to deal with Cranks shell barricade before they can get to the dash panel, this time.

It's about time for them to make a break for it-as far from Chompy as possible!

2 Green Cheeps have flitted onto the track, and they've dropped more slime! Does anyone need those?

Track Update!
Changing conditions!

PURPLE SEGMENT
Chompy is free!
---Hazard Modifier---
You no longer gain a bonus against Chompys attacks no matter which curve you choose.
-1 to your check if risk Chompys yard.
Chompy is free! He may chase racers down the track! 4 turns til the Track Lakitus get him under control!

GREEN SEGMENT
Shell Barricade (3 shells) (5 turns left to bounce)
A deadly triplet of green shells dropped by Crank, bouncing around the track. Aimed ahead of the dash panel-enjoy the ink!

BLUE SEGMENT
Shell Barricade (1 shells) (5 turns left to bounce)
A deadly green shell randomly dropped by Bowser, bouncing around the track.
« Last Edit: September 23, 2021, 09:36:30 pm by Dwarmin »
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Dwarmin's fell gaze has fallen upon you. Sadly, Your life and your quest end here, at this sig.

"The hats never coming off."

Fluffe9911

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  • Such ‼Socks‼ Much Fun
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Re: MKL 21' Grand Prix-S1, R1: Luigis Waterway (Turn 7-Mid race massacre!)
« Reply #58 on: September 23, 2021, 02:27:45 pm »

Waluigi starts pounding on his kart! "GAHHHHHHHH NO FAIR NO FAIR NO FAIR NO FAIR WALUIGI NUMBER ONE NOT NUMBER THREE WHY MUST EVERYBODY CHEAT WALUIGI OUT OF VICTORY WHY CANT THEY JUST PLAY FAIR AND LET WALUIGI WIN WAAAAAAA!!!" Waluigi pounds on his kart a bit more before finally calming down "THATS IT NO MORE MR NICE WALUIGI IF EVERYONE WANTS TO CHEAT AGAINST WALUIGI SO BAD THEN WALUIGI SHALL START CHEATING AGAINST THEM WAAAAAAAA!" Defensive driving but in a way that makes it seem like its actually aggressive driving WAAAAAAA!
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SuperDino85

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Re: MKL 21' Grand Prix-S1, R1: Luigis Waterway (Turn 7-Mid race massacre!)
« Reply #59 on: September 23, 2021, 03:22:16 pm »

Buuuurrrrrpp!! Okay…I better stop eating those…I gotta put more effort into catching up! And making sure Chompy gets more food daily than he’s been getting! Maybe I’ll personally hire the snowman…”

Powerslide the inner curve like a maniac!! (And let out a shrill whistle at Chompy)
« Last Edit: September 23, 2021, 08:30:57 pm by SuperDino85 »
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