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Author Topic: LGBTQ+ Thread  (Read 20621 times)

Great Order

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #375 on: January 16, 2023, 11:47:24 pm »

I apparently count as queer according to some because I'm asexual, so my queer experience is mostly defined by a lack of experience xD Cuddling is fucking awesome though.

Plus Sister having had a child has shut down the "but I want graaandchiiildddreen" from my mother. So that's nice. Because...no, not happening. Eww. Still get the occassional "but you'd be such a good father" or "maybe you'll meet someone with kids!" but like...I like being an Uncle. You get to give him back. Can't do that with your own kid...

(Well I guess technically you can but... xD)
Ha, I resolved the grandkids issue by spending the last 7 years saying I don't want kids. Not ace in any way, I just value my free time and general freedom to do things. Having a kid pins you down for a minimum of 18 years. On top of that, I've got mental health issues that I don't want to pass on and that'd make me poorly suited to being a parent. You can't just have a depressed mope for a month or two when you're someone's primary carer.

With regards to ace being part of the LGBTQ+ thing, yup. Pretty much anything outside the cishet norm falls under the umbrella.
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Vector

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #376 on: January 17, 2023, 01:13:42 am »

I'm going to have to come out to my advisor as part of explaining why the likelihood of my getting a job at an R1 university or, frankly, any other university, is practically nil these days, because he's been asking me about my career interests.

I don't want to do it, as I kind of expect that this is going to be the beginning of my being gently shoved out the door. But as my mom said, I need to work on my mental health and play the game of life more aggressively. God knows I know how to play hardball. It's practically a condition of being a union organizer. But she told me to play hardball about resting and playing, and let forcing me out of the school be a task for my enemies, not for me.

(My mom's still an asshole by the way, but she spent today talking to me for an hour about me and only me, and this is practically the first time I can remember her ever doing that in the entire time I've been alive and, you know, older than 2.)

--

I briefly identified on the ace spectrum but I'm kind of convinced now that it's less about some kind of built in wiring and more about having a vanishingly small dating pool.
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"The question of the usefulness of poetry arises only in periods of its decline, while in periods of its flowering, no one doubts its total uselessness." - Boris Pasternak

nonbinary/genderqueer renegade mathematician and mafia subforum limpet. please avoid quoting me.

EuchreJack

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #377 on: January 17, 2023, 12:16:53 pm »

I'm going to have to come out to my advisor as part of explaining why the likelihood of my getting a job at an R1 university or, frankly, any other university, is practically nil these days, because he's been asking me about my career interests.

I don't want to do it, as I kind of expect that this is going to be the beginning of my being gently shoved out the door. But as my mom said, I need to work on my mental health and play the game of life more aggressively. God knows I know how to play hardball. It's practically a condition of being a union organizer. But she told me to play hardball about resting and playing, and let forcing me out of the school be a task for my enemies, not for me.

(My mom's still an asshole by the way, but she spent today talking to me for an hour about me and only me, and this is practically the first time I can remember her ever doing that in the entire time I've been alive and, you know, older than 2.)

--

I briefly identified on the ace spectrum but I'm kind of convinced now that it's less about some kind of built in wiring and more about having a vanishingly small dating pool.
I don't think you have to say anything if you don't want to say anything.

Ideally, your advisor wants you to be successful, and would prefer that you don't limit yourself.

Hell, I've done tons of stuff that some might have said that I had "nil chance of success at".

In the event you get the question "why haven't you moved on somewhere else", you can always look them straight in the eye and say "I like it here", smile broadly, and watch your advisor unfold before you.

EDIT: Remember, someone has to be the Pioneer.

Great Order

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #378 on: January 19, 2023, 10:40:08 pm »

Does anyone know where I could source some tucking underwear/gaffs that:

A) Aren't thong-shaped
B) Aren't expensive as hell (Seriously, the cheapest non-thong gaff I can find is 37 *per pair*
C) Can be got in the UK

?

I'm not a fan of the thong type because it's like walking with a permanent wedgie.
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Vector

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #379 on: January 20, 2023, 12:07:16 am »

Tomboy X
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"The question of the usefulness of poetry arises only in periods of its decline, while in periods of its flowering, no one doubts its total uselessness." - Boris Pasternak

nonbinary/genderqueer renegade mathematician and mafia subforum limpet. please avoid quoting me.

Great Order

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #380 on: January 20, 2023, 04:45:16 pm »

Cheers, I'll give them a look.

In other news, deed poll's done. Signed by everyone who needs to sign it.

Every time I get another thing done it makes me feel way better. It's like I've been carrying around a load of tension, but it's been there so long I've not even realised it.

EDIT: Damn, 28 per pair. And that's cheaper than than the other non-thong pairs I've seen.

Well, needs must.
« Last Edit: January 20, 2023, 07:51:40 pm by Great Order »
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I may have wasted all those years
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Rolan7

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #381 on: January 20, 2023, 09:01:26 pm »

Huh I wonder if I'm supposed to be worried about that.  I don't think it's usually a problem with the pants I wear, but it's clearly important to a lot of people.

What I do absolutely love is my sports bra.  Technically plural, but my other one is too tight on the band :(  This one feels so perfect I hate to take it off.  It provides support and keeps my chest from being uh, visible, which is almost always how I prefer to look.  I do like having them though.

I'm even occasionally thinking about progesterone (I have another appointment in a couple weeks) but I don't think so.  I might honestly be happiest as I am!  Particularly with whatever growth is still coming- I'm only 9 months in, and I think technically at C.

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Great Order

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #382 on: January 22, 2023, 10:31:00 pm »

If it doesn't concern you, then don't be concerned. I'm doing it because it relieves some dysphoria.

Anyway, seems that all the tucking undies are sold out in my size. Bit of a pain in the arse.
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I may have wasted all those years
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Loud Whispers

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #383 on: January 24, 2023, 09:46:57 am »

No pun intended

Great Order

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #384 on: January 26, 2023, 06:46:23 am »

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I may have wasted all those years
They're not worth their time in tears
I may have spent too long in darkness
In the warmth of my fears

Loud Whispers

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #385 on: January 27, 2023, 08:19:51 am »

Pack it in, no need for this funny business

Great Order

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #386 on: January 27, 2023, 07:19:33 pm »

Sorry, it's just my brain gets tuck making puns when the opportunity arises.


I'm feeling a lot better about myself. Not like my mood's better, I'm just a lot more content being me. I think it might be just knowing that things are happening, even if there's no actual changes yet, along with me almost fully socially transitioning.
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I may have wasted all those years
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Iris

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #387 on: January 28, 2023, 02:43:25 am »

heyyyy guys it's ya girl Iris here, what'd I miss?
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Rolan7

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #388 on: January 28, 2023, 03:18:59 am »

I'm seeing my endo on Tuesday for bloodwork (which, naturally, I won't see for 2-3 days but I FEEL like my levels are finally good) and I kinda have to decide beforehand whether I want to get on progesterone.
« Last Edit: January 28, 2023, 12:40:45 pm by Rolan7 »
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They/them
No justice, no peace.
Quote from: Fallen London, one Unthinkable Hope
This one didn't want to be who they was. On the Surface it was a dull, unconsidered sadness. But everything changed. Which implied everything could change.

Great Order

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Re: LGBTQ+ Thread
« Reply #389 on: January 28, 2023, 12:37:00 pm »

Gaffs have finally reappeared in my size!

I've now spent over 100 on FOUR PAIRS. I could get cheaper ones but they're all the thong type which, as mentioned, are a no-no. I assume it's some economy of scale thing, there's not a lot of demand for them so there's no real reason to make a dedicated factory to them.
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I may have wasted all those years
They're not worth their time in tears
I may have spent too long in darkness
In the warmth of my fears
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