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Author Topic: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s  (Read 18283 times)

soup_alex

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #45 on: August 01, 2008, 11:04:58 am »

My favourite useless artifacts thus far are those whose creation was a direct consequence of dwarven possession:

Volaletur, "The White Boulder", a Siltstone toy boat.
It is encrusted with Siltstone.
On the item is an image of a demon in Siltstone.
(Great, all-aboard the S.S. Demonship. Or "Sinksalot", who builds a boat out of solid bleeding rock?!)

Inirozsit, "Declinecrabs" (wouldn't you?), a Bituminous coal idol.
It is studded with Zinc and encircled with bands of Bituminous coal. This object menaces with spikes of bituminous coal.
On the item is an image of a goblin in donkey leather. The goblin is falling (likely refers to my last adventurer's chance encounter with a gobbo guard when he got lost on the way to a Tower. If I remember correctly; tearing the creature's guts out with a great axe didn't kill it, but being knocked back and falling >10 z-levels, did).
On the item is an image of the Diorite mechanisms in Iron (earlier artifact).
(A potentially-explosive artifact idol. Hmm... where shall I put it?)
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Deon

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #46 on: August 01, 2008, 11:47:11 am »

Not explosive (sadly) but it will burn for a long time and set everything on fire =).

Ah, all these ashen/fuel idols always remind me morrovind ash statuettes.

P.S.
Really... WTF?
« Last Edit: August 01, 2008, 11:59:02 am by Deon »
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MrGimp

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #47 on: August 01, 2008, 01:26:27 pm »

Vatheznakas huh?  So thats how you say 'Virginal Enjoyment' in dwarvish...
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Deon

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #48 on: August 01, 2008, 01:47:03 pm »

And it's a wooden scepeter... Duh.
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userpay

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #49 on: August 01, 2008, 03:35:29 pm »

Not explosive (sadly) but it will burn for a long time and set everything on fire =).

Ah, all these ashen/fuel idols always remind me morrovind ash statuettes.

P.S.
Really... WTF?

Give it to the kings wife!
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Alfador

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #50 on: August 01, 2008, 04:31:40 pm »

Not explosive (sadly) but it will burn for a long time and set everything on fire =).

Ah, all these ashen/fuel idols always remind me morrovind ash statuettes.

P.S.
Really... WTF?

Give it to the kings wife!

It's decorated with Palm and manipulated with palm. ;D
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soup_alex

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #51 on: August 01, 2008, 04:33:56 pm »

It's decorated with Palm and manipulated with palm. ;D
This is a terrible pun. All craftsdwarfship is of the poorest quality. :P
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MercDraco

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #52 on: August 02, 2008, 06:28:30 am »

First artifact of my current fort worth 100800$ built in the Summer of my first year in this aquafier hellhole.
was a Copper Flute made with encrusted with Yellow zincon, with Copper and Gold! (first ore i found there bought the copper with me) with a Picture of a copper flute in GOLD!,
a fire imp then came out and the black smith punted it down the hall and broke the suckers neck and without killing it went for a drink.  The Imp was finally finished off by one of my peasants after i activated him.
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Deon

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #53 on: August 02, 2008, 07:16:44 am »

Actually I don't think why is your artifact lame, it's nice and even has a nice price.
A thing for a dwarven philospher to play with.
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Zwergner

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #54 on: August 02, 2008, 02:45:57 pm »

Basic value of 116400, weighs 15 O_o



Who wants to go see a mule show?  Only 5 monies.
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MuonDecay

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #55 on: August 02, 2008, 04:56:41 pm »

Basic value of 116400, weighs 15 O_o



Who wants to go see a mule show?  Only 5 monies.

The dwarf that wears that thing is someone who carries himself with a lot of gravity.

(now that is how you pun)
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betamax

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #56 on: August 02, 2008, 05:38:01 pm »



First artefact made in the fortress. I don't think he had much inspiration.
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MuonDecay

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #57 on: August 02, 2008, 09:11:02 pm »



First artefact made in the fortress. I don't think he had much inspiration.

Pour vinegar on it and show him what you think of his lack of creativity?
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Muz

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #58 on: August 02, 2008, 11:34:08 pm »

I got my first artifact last night. My dwarf got possessed and muttered something sinister sounding like Nakasthur.

He made a dolomite floor grate worth 3000+. Lol, I'm still figuring out what to do with it. Of all the marble lying around my fort, he made it with dolomite.
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Northstar1989

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Re: Yet another in the long list of artifact 'WTF?'s
« Reply #59 on: July 22, 2014, 10:38:36 pm »

I got my first artifact last night. My dwarf got possessed and muttered something sinister sounding like Nakasthur.

He made a dolomite floor grate worth 3000+. Lol, I'm still figuring out what to do with it. Of all the marble lying around my fort, he made it with dolomite.

Necro post aside, that's actually useful- artifact quality grates are indestructible to Forgotten Beasts and such...
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