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Author Topic: Essentials of a Good Online Game  (Read 5480 times)

linda07

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Essentials of a Good Online Game
« on: January 04, 2008, 03:31:00 am »

Like you all souls out there I am an avid gamer…done it all, seen it all. Right from playing tetris, super mario, ping pong and other flash games online for free to massively multiplayer online role-playing game (MMORPG) with anything and everything in between, I have been part of the story as a user, and I have to say that you guys suck.

Spurred by hatred, I became a developer - computer science degree (quite natural, ha ha!) and job with a *real* software company, the works. This enlightened me to certain facts, like what made the blockbuster games, well, blockbusters. I will share with you guys the essentials of a successful online game, or a game of any kind, played for free or otherwise. These have been a constant over the years and are likely to remain so.  I pronounce this. They are:

They should be fun

The basic principle which even the most scatterbrained developer would follow, but is often ignored during the zeal of getting the next level of technique. Don’t ever forget that people play games for one reason: to have fun!  Your games are not fun.  Except Squiggles and Fuck You.  I like those.

The KISS principle

Yes, that ‘KISS’.  It's important to wear lots of face paint while you program.  And you can type with your long Gene Simmons tongue.

Smooth Controls

Even the blandest game can be fun, if controls are easy to master. On the other hand people won’t play the greatest game in the world out of frustration if they have to struggle with the controls.  So take care.  TARN ADAMS could learn from this.  Dumbass.

Graphics and Sound

Make a good first impression. These are the first things a gamer encounters when he first logs in to play online. So make them attractive and relevant, but don’t go overboard.

Technically sound Structure

Easy to use authoring interfaces.
Detailed Help files, sample games, and demonstrations.
No messy software downloads or installation requirements.
Options to create games from your web browser.

Your games have none of these things.

[ January 04, 2008: Message edited by: Toady One ]

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Capntastic

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #1 on: January 04, 2008, 04:43:00 am »

They should be free and written by a Toad with magic powers.

Also I wish I knew what this said prior to edit.

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Citizen of Erl

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #2 on: January 04, 2008, 04:46:00 am »

Ironically, Bay 12 stuff is also probably way superior to your stuff. Funny old world.
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Toady One

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #3 on: January 04, 2008, 05:23:00 am »

Before there was just a fairly straight exposition of her online gaming principles, and there was a link to an online version of tetris in the poster's signature.  I didn't click the link though, so who knows where it actually led...

[ January 04, 2008: Message edited by: Toady One ]

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The Toad, a Natural Resource:  Preserve yours today!

Nite/m4re

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #4 on: January 04, 2008, 09:35:00 am »

Funny. Was this written by a Spam-Bot ?
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Armok

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #5 on: January 04, 2008, 10:09:00 am »

Toady, I don't know what was actually written here before your edit, however to respond to those who say like it says now:

Don't listen to them Toady, this game it made for a specific kind of person, and however many comes nagging about graphics and interface and balance they are still wrong, because game development should never be a democratic process, it should be a creative one.
I for one part LIKE to learn a new interface, I am to slow for most action based games and think grinding level-hunting games are unfun, actually I find that now when I have learned the interface it has removed one of the most fun and challenging aspects of the current game yet missing armies and other outside threats, what would corin have been if the controls where in the manual?
For fun, this is a game by a programmer for programmers/nerds, the fun lies not in action-packed... action, it lies in experimenting and seeing the results, it's lies in creating something magnificent and overcoming the difficulties in doing so, Its the fun of science and creation, not competition. losing is fun, not mastering.
This is one, maybe the only, game that has not been polluted, dumbified and destroyed by the "rules" of devepoping a "good" game, it's a game for INTELEGENT people and if people are to dumb to play it they don't deserve to do so.
This game, and the things sounding it, means more than anything else to me, even my life and my family would be in danger would it come to that, please dont try to fix what is not broken, stick to your original plan and ignore dumbases that complain you are not making brainded shit that they can understand like evrybody  else.
Please don't listen to them

-your greatest fan

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So says Armok, God of blood.
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Fenrir

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #6 on: January 04, 2008, 11:02:00 am »

quote:
Originally posted by Nite/m4re:
<STRONG>Funny. Was this written by a Spam-Bot ?</STRONG>

This was clearly the work of a spam bot. This "person"'s title is the same as the thread title.
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Nite/m4re

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #7 on: January 04, 2008, 11:48:00 am »

Hehe, wonder how the spam-bot got the name of the games and Toady name correct.... Things are getting advanced.

EDIT: Kind of, it's all in upper case.

[ January 04, 2008: Message edited by: Nite/m4re ]

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myd

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #8 on: January 04, 2008, 02:35:00 pm »

Now, this is really mysterious. It's definitely a bot, as i found the text at other forums via google, but this is the only place it gets specific and kind of abusive.  :(

see eg at the igda forums (international game developers association)
Igda forums

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Capntastic

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #9 on: January 04, 2008, 02:42:00 pm »

I'm fairly sure it's abusive because Toady edited in the self-deprecating stuff for jokes.
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myd

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #10 on: January 04, 2008, 02:48:00 pm »

Oh, that would explain it. And here i sit puzzling how an algorythm could work that finds such detailed info inside forums   :D
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Nite/m4re

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #11 on: January 04, 2008, 03:30:00 pm »

ORIGINAL:

quote:
The KISS principle

Not that ‘KISS’ silly. Just ‘Keep It Simple Stupid.’ So you are the next whiz kid on the block. Good for you! But for heaven’s sake don’t load people with complex features. Just give clean straight fun without the loops.  


TOADY EDIT:

quote:
The KISS principle

Yes, that ‘KISS’. It's important to wear lots of face paint while you program. And you can type with your long Gene Simmons tongue.  


 :D

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Aristharus

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #12 on: January 04, 2008, 04:53:00 pm »

Toady's edits of these things are brilliant. There really should be a way to see the original post. This is the only forum where the spam doesn't irritate me, and instead I WANT to see messages like these, and possibly fast, or at least before Toady.

He's just too fast. I usually end up googling for the original spam message. Like now.

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Soulwynd

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #13 on: January 04, 2008, 04:55:00 pm »

Boobs'n'guns. That's all your game needs.

/sarcasm

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Baro

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Re: Essentials of a Good Online Game
« Reply #14 on: January 04, 2008, 05:08:00 pm »

Oh toady,  haha.
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