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[Strife26]

I was looking at my records recently and noticed that it's now been a whole year since I became a Noncommisioned Officer. I was reflecting a bit on what all it means and especially why I'm unhappy with where I am these days.

I've spent all four years of my Army career (short of training) in the same platoon of the same company of the same battalion. I've crawled my way from being a dumb private to being a dumb private with a supervisory job and responsibility, to a specialist. Then back to the States and the tanks, I was trusted with being thrust into a gunner's role with three days of preparation, shot one tank and drove another during our tank qualification tables. A gunner on a tank is a supervisory, superior position to the lower crewmen, so I was then a leader, at least on paper.

I'm not sure when I really started to think about being a leader or acting like it. My authority has always been styled on being better than the other soldiers. I don't think that anyone is willing to argue the fact that I'm the resident expert on tanks amongst the gunners, or the fact that I've always done my damnedest to keep things as good as possible for the soldiers while still focusing on fighting first and foremost. At the end of the day, though, I feel like I'm utterly out of my element dealing with soldiers, especially when the way to get your voice heard amongst the nco's involves avoiding work, brown nosing, and a concerted effort to look good, not have a good platoon of tanks and tankers. Maybe it's a matter of never having real leadership training or mentoring other than a little bit cribbed from friends on the internet, but I don't feel happy all the time, any more.


I've spent all four years of my Army career (short of training) in the same platoon of the same company of the same battalion. I've seen four different first sergeants, four commanders, and a few different teams on the battalion level. These days, I can't help but feel depressed and angry when I look at the people in charge of us. Everything seems stacked against the soldiers now.

There's nothing wrong with hard work. One of the basic principles of effective training is that it be difficult. However, there's a fine line between forcing hard work for a team and continually grinding us down into nothingness. We never got off work before 7 pm last week. That's happened before, but this time, there wasn't a single good reason for it. It was just company leadership changing their minds about what the hell they wanted done, then making the platoons suffer for it. It gets worse when, instead of training for our job (fighting North Koreans from the Abrams) we do stupid shit. Layouts upon layouts. Pointless competitions about infantry skills. Being issued incorrect equipment just so it can be issued out. It's depressing. Worse, no one feels like it's going to change any time soon. The guys trust some sergeants, but I can't do a damn thing except wait for the day I reach my own boiling point. Then I'll have the fun oppurtunity to put take my chevrons off of my chest, add them to my hat and Frisbee them across the motor pool.


I'm not really sure what my point was to typing all this. My life in the Army isn't that bad and I cope just fine most days. Hell, I was genuinely happy under other command teams. I'm banking money at a damn respectable rate while I'm here, and I'm hoping to see more of Korea when I can. Yet, for all that, if I don't feel like the unit I'm working for is worth it any more, I can't really think of much other than getting out (of here, or of the army), bashing my head against the brick wall of our problems, or ineffectually treading water and watching the days tick by.

[MonkeyHead]

I have hared similar stories from others in many branches of the armed forces of a few nations - that a lot of the time those giving the orders don't actually have any orders to give, and instead issue the men under their command a lot of "keep busy", as if that will be good for readiness and moral, when the reverse is true. tales of endless potato peeling, and painting coal white are amongst some of the worst. From what others have told me this is even more likely if those further up the tree are new or have never seen combat and need to be seen to be doing something even if it is pointless, and less likely if their superiors are more experienced, have worked their way up the ranks, or are veterans in one way or another. One problem might be the fact that you are performing relatively peace-time service, where people who are good at what you have to do do not get a chance to shine as much as some pencil pushing desk surfer

[Strife26]

Hello everyone, I hope that life's going fine enough for you. I'm still around and kicking, but my real tanking days might be over.

I just got back from doing Gunnery. I'm sure in 100 pages of occasionally legible rambling I've mentioned it, it's *the* big deal for us. Table 6 gunnery tests our individual performance as a crew, while subsequent tables (which aren't as important to us, more for higher ups) are about section and platoon work.

I think that the exercise could have gone better, all things considered. Upper levels by straight score, but mediocre in qualified engagements. We ended up dropping several more engagements than we should have, but in all three cases, we picked them up reasonably quickly. 2 of the mistakes were mostly on me, one for bad ammunition, one for a shared poor call for acting like we were fighting instead of on a range. Despite the (occasional) best efforts of the Army, there's a big difference between battlefield best practices and getting the best score possible at gunnery. I will, without a doubt, stand by the fact that we fought through our problems better than any other tank, bar none (both of the dropped engagements were seconds away from qualified, and both of those seconds were rangism-errors).

If it's the best score versus the best combat practices, combat practices are the way I'd lean every time. However, it's still a somewhat depressing turn of events for my last big hurrah (nonwithstanding whatever chaos I start causing right before I bounce). Flexibility and making things work with everything is fucked up has been my hallmark as a NCO, using ridiculous amounts of elbow grease, expertise, and cobbled together solutions. Just once, though, I would have liked the chance to roll into gunnery with a crew that had practiced together ahead of time, or as a tank commander-gunner pair that had trained as a team for more than a week. Tanking is what I do (at least for this last stage of my life) and a perfect score should have been within reach.

Depressing, but we had some decently great moments, and the gunnery as a whole was mismanaged enough that simple survival is enough. Also, we stole and destroyed the company commander's hat, so that's a big plus.

The rest of my Army career should be downhill from here, so it's time for me to start getting seriously serious about post-Army life. I've been absent minded lately, but it should pass in a few days, probably-maybe-hopefully.

[Reverie]

Congratulations on making it this far ^^

[Yoink]

Happy 100 Pages, and good luck with whatever your future may hold!

[Strife26]

"Warning: this topic has not been posted in for at least 120 days.
Unless you're sure you want to reply, please consider starting a new topic."

Shush you, forum.



Well, it's been a hot minute and I'm now separated from the army. Exactly what I'm doing next is pretty iffy, because I don't  have much of a clue.

The rough plan for the moment would be to end up at a traditional four year college. I think that I'd be competitive for some of the fancier places, with five years of soldiering, over a hundred semester hours of CLEP accreditation, and pretty good test scores. However, I don't have much of a clue what or where I'd want to study. Fortunately, most of that sort of school have a deadline for applications around winter, so I've got nearly a year to decide and apply.

Unfortunately, that would put around a year and a half before I'd be at school and a year and a half until I'd start collecting my GI Bill benefits. As long as my savings and car hold up (and the caddy has been a terrible, terrible money sink on the savings in the last year and a half), I can live pretty damn cheaply right now, but I'm still considering getting a job to help tide me over.

 I don't know if I really want to pick a city and settle down right away, though. I mean, my skills and talents aren't great, but I consider  myself a competitive enough employee. I like having the flexibility to pick up and drive wherever I want, so it'd need to be interesting, resume-building, flexible, or well-paying work to be really attractive to me at the moment. I've got a rough draft of a master resume built up that I'll keep working on as well as looking to see if I can find something to catch my interest.

I suppose that the ideal thing would be for me to try to pick up something internet-based that's enough to pay most of my meager expenses, but I don't have the skills or background to pursue something like that without additional experience and practice. I'm nowhere close to the 100,000 words of crap before anything I'll write would be presentable. For now, writing more on here is fun enough practice for things.

[MonkeyHead]

"Warning: this topic has not been posted in for at least 120 days.
Unless you're sure you want to reply, please consider starting a new topic."

Shush you, forum.



Well, it's been a hot minute and I'm now separated from the army. Exactly what I'm doing next is pretty iffy, because I don't  have much of a clue.

The rough plan for the moment would be to end up at a traditional four year college. I think that I'd be competitive for some of the fancier places, with five years of soldiering, over a hundred semester hours of CLEP accreditation, and pretty good test scores. However, I don't have much of a clue what or where I'd want to study. Fortunately, most of that sort of school have a deadline for applications around winter, so I've got nearly a year to decide and apply.

Unfortunately, that would put around a year and a half before I'd be at school and a year and a half until I'd start collecting my GI Bill benefits. As long as my savings and car hold up (and the caddy has been a terrible, terrible money sink on the savings in the last year and a half), I can live pretty damn cheaply right now, but I'm still considering getting a job to help tide me over.

 I don't know if I really want to pick a city and settle down right away, though. I mean, my skills and talents aren't great, but I consider  myself a competitive enough employee. I like having the flexibility to pick up and drive wherever I want, so it'd need to be interesting, resume-building, flexible, or well-paying work to be really attractive to me at the moment. I've got a rough draft of a master resume built up that I'll keep working on as well as looking to see if I can find something to catch my interest.

I suppose that the ideal thing would be for me to try to pick up something internet-based that's enough to pay most of my meager expenses, but I don't have the skills or background to pursue something like that without additional experience and practice. I'm nowhere close to the 100,000 words of crap before anything I'll write would be presentable. For now, writing more on here is fun enough practice for things.

Considered anything engineering based? There is decent cash in jobs where you can travel freely to work on heavier engineering projects, and with your work on tanks and whatnot you have the transferable skills...

[Strife26]

I'd definitely be very interested in doing engineering work, it's just always a matter of finding someone with flexible enough requirements that I can spin three years of bussing tables and five years of tanking into meeting them (although I've written up some resumes that I consider very impressive off of that). I need to come up with some better networking to figure out an option for a to-do-for-now job.


Well, completely meeting expectations, my car has now developed a pretty considerable oil leak. Fortunately, I've made it down to visit my grandparents, so immobility isn't an arrow in my heart. Mechanic appointment on Monday which will hopefully reveal cheap repairs only. The cost of repairs on the car is now just about at the amount I paid for the thing, and it just brushed over 70,000 miles. A new car is certainly high on the priority list. I'd like something that I can sleep in as comfortably as my caddy, but money is money is money.


First pass through on colleges to think about has begun, using a Princeton review book. Lucky number 69 for different options, plus two North Dakota schools to consider. I obviously need a lot more time to process choices, but it's a start.


Other than that, South Texas is cold, but much warmer than central. Money is always an object, but I can drop my spending requirements nicely while I'm couch surfing. Depending on how my car works out, I'm considering holing up in Florida for a bit. At standard rates for renting a college-town type room, I can actually save money vs living in a car, plus all the time and trouble on it saved.


Too soon to know anything for sure and too tough to find a place to head to. Fun Fun Fun.

[Zrk2]

Good luck. Glad to see everything's going relatively well enough.

[Zrk2]

Hehe. Nice forum here guys, and girls Nice to be here.

Hello?

[Strife26]

I'm perfectly happy to welcome any and all types to the thread, unless they turn out to be poor posters. In that event, I'm sure that we can trace their origin to the pit of horribleness in Life Advice, the general computer questions spot.

[Zrk2]

I'm perfectly happy to welcome any and all types to the thread, unless they turn out to be poor posters. In that event, I'm sure that we can trace their origin to the pit of horribleness in Life Advice, the general computer questions spot.

What? That's like the only worthwhile thread on here.

[Strife26]

I'm perfectly happy to welcome any and all types to the thread, unless they turn out to be poor posters. In that event, I'm sure that we can trace their origin to the pit of horribleness in Life Advice, the general computer questions spot.

What? That's like the only worthwhile thread on here.

Sure, but there's more posts in it than in this thread, so I can hardly trust it, just for competition's sake. Besides, it gives me a reasonable scapegoat for my long line of computer problems. General Computer Advice is plotting against me, I tell you.



Car is busted and in the shop, so I've found myself back in Fargo for some time. It's more than a little stressful for me to be back home in the basement, but I'm trying to make the best of it. I've said it more than once before, but I hope that it'll run okay after this chunk of money sunk into it. :|


All things considered, I need a car, then somewhere to live, then a job. With some polishing, my resume should be ready to get sent out to more companies. A job for now, then eventually a college, but the car seems to hold everything up for now.

[Zrk2]

I suppose you don't want to work in a factory or anything, let alone for the rest of your life, so what are you thinking for college?

[Strife26]

Warning: this topic has not been posted in for at least 120 days.
Unless you're sure you want to reply, please consider starting a new topic.

Bah humbug to you too, forum software.

Anyway, Life and Times continue! I've successfully fixed my car (again. And again, it should be okay for awhile now. It's just over 80,000 miles, for Armok's sake). Amazingly, I've found myself in a tank-related job, which is pretty great. For a bachelor, the pay is pretty generous.  Unfortunately, it's not what I'd really like to do for the rest of my life. The pay is fine for now, but it doesn't come with much chance of advancement nor a ton of job security. Also, I think that I'd like to do something in Air Conditioning that doesn't require me to smash my hand with heavy tools on a regular basis. In the short term though, groovy as hell.

My current intention is to pick up the whole traditional college thing come Fall 2016. I'm almost a top-level student, and I'm hoping that my army career can drag my test scores and grades up a percentile or three. I'm working on crawling through applications right now, but it's an amazingly frustrating project. They, as a general rule, are *really* not set up for people who haven't been in high school for five years. Trying to reestablish contact with my old teachers and counselors is a particular pain, plus getting test score to every school I'm considering (at last cut, I think it was 11 or so. I'm spitballing school selection fairly badly) is looking like an annoying expense.


So yeah, I haven't caught a bullet yet and all that.