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Author Topic: Your most uber "Duh" moments  (Read 20985 times)

Hamster Man

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #30 on: March 08, 2009, 04:48:19 am »

Nice! I recently found out that if a diplomat has seen a trap, that trap is disabled for the rest of their civ. Of course it might have been nice if I knew that -before- the elves sieged me.

"Oh they'll never get past my trap-hall!"
-two minutes later-
"Wtf? Why are all my jobs cancelling?"
-several screen movements later-
"I'VE GOT ELVES IN MY KITCHEN!!!"
Logged
So there's that, as well. It looks like the only chronic problems that water can't cure are nausea and cave spider bites.
Which, coincidentally enough, can be cured by magma.

AncientEnemy

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #31 on: March 08, 2009, 05:11:21 am »

I ran out of booze because every barrel I had was full of camel fat.

i just wrote the tale: http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php?topic=31933.0

Heron TSG

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #32 on: March 08, 2009, 11:26:07 am »

Murphy, triplets aren't all born at the exact same time. that would hurt like HELL.  :P
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Est Sularus Oth Mithas
The Artist Formerly Known as Barbarossa TSG

Thor2axe

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #33 on: March 08, 2009, 03:12:36 pm »

I flooded fortress after fortress, because my floodgates wouldnt hold back magma. I couldnt figure it out. And then, suddenly, I was thinking that magma floodgates should have to have obsidian mechanisms. Oh yeah, they do have to.... duh.
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Yanlin

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #34 on: March 08, 2009, 04:04:29 pm »

"I'VE GOT ELVES IN MY KITCHEN!!!"

Well cook them.
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WE NEED A SLOGAN!

Tradanbattlan

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #35 on: March 08, 2009, 04:52:29 pm »

ThtblovesDF

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #36 on: March 08, 2009, 04:54:31 pm »

O god so true!
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woose1

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #37 on: March 08, 2009, 05:11:27 pm »

You nailed it. How they stand there after like dumbasses.
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Nesoo

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #38 on: March 08, 2009, 05:33:28 pm »

I thought I was being so clever making a moat around my entrance.  I'll let the pictures talk.

http://img14.imageshack.us/img14/2083/justasiplanned.png
http://img15.imageshack.us/img15/5364/ornot.png

Yeah, I've done that too... but I was lucky enough to notice before it could do any extensive damage. I don't think I lost a single room, though one ended up having some mud in it.

Of course, then the moat froze over when winter came, so it was all rather pointless to begin with...
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000508 □ [dwarf mode][flows] flooding over a full pond will kill the fish inside

sonerohi

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #39 on: March 08, 2009, 07:18:07 pm »

I gave my dwarves the ability to breathe fire, and forgot to give them fire immunity. When an ambush met my extremely popular speardwarf in the middle of a forest, bad things happened. Horrible things.
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I picked up the stone and carved my name into the wind.

Hagadorn

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #40 on: March 08, 2009, 07:20:59 pm »

I gave my dwarves the ability to breathe fire, and forgot to give them fire immunity. When an ambush met my extremely popular speardwarf in the middle of a forest, bad things happened. Horrible things.


... Unspeakable things?
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You see, booze is a parasite. It lives off dwarves and compels them to dig into the ground so as to create massive defences to protect it's self. It really shouldn't be called dwarf fortress, Booze fortress would make much more sense.

ToonyMan

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #41 on: March 08, 2009, 07:41:26 pm »

Rule #1:  Don't charge bow or crossbow wielding creatures.

Rule #2:  You can't grow plants on dry rock.

Rule #3:  Don't butcher fire imps.

Rule #4:  Carp are deadly.

Rule #5:  Dwarves are stupid.

Rule #6:  CATS ARE THE BEST DOOP DOOP DE DOOP!!
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praguepride

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #42 on: March 08, 2009, 07:47:56 pm »

I thought I was clever by putting a walkway above the underground river to give Urist McDwarf a solid platform to fish off of.

Urist McDwarf cancels construction of floor: Interrupted by olmman

What? Force job! Force job! Just build it, they're just in the water below you, they can't hurt you.

Urist McDwarf was struck down.

Oh yeah, amphibious creatures can walk on land...and the olmman, snakemen, giant toads, and the cave crocodiles infesting the river..are...all...amphibious. Ah crap!
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Man, dwarves are such a**holes!

Even automatic genocide would be a better approach

ZergSpartan

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #43 on: March 08, 2009, 08:10:14 pm »

I thought I was clever by putting a walkway above the underground river to give Urist McDwarf a solid platform to fish off of.

Urist McDwarf cancels construction of floor: Interrupted by olmman

What? Force job! Force job! Just build it, they're just in the water below you, they can't hurt you.

Urist McDwarf was struck down.

Oh yeah, amphibious creatures can walk on land...and the olmman, snakemen, giant toads, and the cave crocodiles infesting the river..are...all...amphibious. Ah crap!

At least he didnt leap (read: Dodge) off and try to wrestle them.

Anyhoo,
I had an aboveground fortress where several preassure plates made an automated drawbridge-a-pult defense work, after an inital test I start receiving messages that Dwarves are splattering against things. Whoops, a locked door is forcing them to path over it and...
...there goes my Legendary woodcutter!
*SPLAT*
... The cooks rushing out after his stuff!
*CRUNCH*
... now everyones making a mad dash for the scattered items!
*OH THE DWARFMANITY*
Logged
"Yeah. My plan was to drop some kittens into the siege, and have my dwarves freefall into battle, landing on top of the kittens. The plan was kinda dumb though because the kittens were standing on grates, and the goblins killed them with arrows just as I was releasing the freefalling dwarves. So the dwarves weren't able to land on kittens and just fell and died."

Skorpion

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Re: Your most uber "Duh" moments
« Reply #44 on: March 08, 2009, 10:20:42 pm »

- Mining a hole in my elf drowner system, causing a flooding of my trade depot that took a full year to solve.

EDIT:
- Modding the elf drowner, but getting the logic wrong with the windmill. Cue partly flooded trade depot while I install another lever and mechanism system to correct the error by inverting the gear assembly.
« Last Edit: March 09, 2009, 12:57:34 am by Skorpion »
Logged
The *large serrated steel disk* strikes the Raven in the head, tearing apart the muscle, shattering the skull, and tearing apart the brain!
A tendon in the skull has been torn!
The Raven has been knocked unconcious!

Elves do it in trees. Humans do it in wooden structures. Dwarves? Dwarves do it underground. With magma.
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