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The HitchHikers Guild to the Dwarfish Galaxy, (Open to Succession)

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Crossroads Inc.:
PART ONE

At long last, things where safe. The planet Krikket was at peace, the
Galaxy was safe, the Universe was safe.

That is at least what most of the residents within the Galaxy believed
when they where told that, moments after the Slo-Time enveloping
Krikket was turned off and the release of the horrible Krikket war
machine was about to once more be unleashed, the whole nasty affair
had been set right by the President of the Galaxy, a resident from the
vicinity of Betelgeuse, a very old man, and two primitive ape decedents.

In truth a number of rather peculiar events has transpired. Marvin the
paranoid android had successfully pacified nearly all of the hideous
Krikket robots. Trillian and Arthur had spoken with HACTAR and later
dispersed him. And Zaphod Beeblebrox, and Ford Prefect, had retired to
the now restored “Heart of Gold”

What was curious is that slightly before Arthur Dent had requested to go
back to return The Ashes ((the burnt remains of a stump symbolizing the
death of English Cricket)) A single remaining Krickket warship had
appeared and destroyed the starship Bistromath before anyone could
board. Forced to retreat to the Heart of Gold, they demanded a very
brash and very stupid thing from the ships computer. Zaphod was
obvious the one behind it.

“Computer!”

“Hi guys! This is Eddi your—“

“Shut up and listen! There’s a Krikket warship out there and we need to
get away from it now!”

“Sounds swell! Where can I take you?”

“We don’t Care! Just take us somewhere the ship can’t get to! Anywhere!”
“You got it!”
“Zaphod Wait! Is that a good id--”

It is at this point that it should be noted that what the computer knew,
and Zaphod did not, is that there is really no place within a Galaxy safe
from a Krikket warship. Obviously, there was only one choice of action...
END INTRODUCTION

((cue music“Journey of the Sorcerer”))

"Out on the outer Eastern arm of a small unassuming galaxy, the once majestic Starship "Heart of Gold" screamed through the skies, hurtling to a primitive world. It was in a bad way, The ship had, through an impossible task, carried itself not just through Hyperspace but several alternate dimension, the world it now rocketed too was one of ancient times, of great deeds, and, of almost certain Death.

"We are all going to Die!" Arthu screamed as he hung onto a railing.. Ford clasped a chair on the bridge as he looked around.
"Nonsense! Every time you have ever said that we have always turned out ok, isn't that right Trillian!"
"Yes, but well.." The ship lurched, everyone looked around..Zaphod slammed back booze..
"The thursters are almost out, if we land, we may never take off again, and I dont liek the looks of our landing site." The ship lurched again as Ford tried to reach for the stabilizers.

"Computer!"
"High there! this is Eddie your shipbored ocmputer and I just know-"
"give me a read out of our likely landing-
"Crashing ford..."
"Our likely 'crashing' site"
"You got it buddy!" The computer chirped as a rocky and rather unpleasant mapp appeared. 


"Well this is it everyone! Were coming in for our final approach!"
"Ford, I, I love oyu Ford.."
"Thank oyu Arthur, I, love you two...
"Yippie! Grab me that Kill-O-Zap over there! this looks like fun!"

"Hang on everyone! for good or for bad, were STRIKING THE EARTH!"

short_dwarf:
This is insane* ^_^


*Please refer to the latter half of my sig.

TheNewerMartianEmperor:
Sounds.... interesting. Where did all the animals come from though?

Crossroads Inc.:
"Day Two"

It has been said the given time, even the most improbable of events, no matter how unlikely, will eventually take place...

"What a crash, my head is spinning Ford." Arthur moaned as he along with the others walked away from the crashed Heart of Gold.
"You think you have problems, Ive got this terrible pain in all the diodes down my left side" whined Marvin as he picked up a supply crate.
"Now look both of you, were safe for the moment, we Have food and supplies from the ship, we just need to work on a place to stay til lwe can get the ship fixed." Ford said, trying to reassure them.
"Easier said then done, the ships Improbability drive is damaged, and were going to need a lot of pure gold to fix it." Trillian mentioned as something caught their attention.

"Look there, in the distance, it looks like a wagon of sorts,"
"I can see someone moving, Fetid Photon, what are we going to do!"
"Theres six of us, if you can count Marvin, well sneak up a check things out." Ford spoke up as they cautiously approached.

"Alright there! Whoever you are come out! no funny tricks!" Shouted Zaphod as they crouched behind a boulder.
"Who do you think you are? Interrupting an Archeologist like that!" A voice rang out from the other-side.
"That voice, I know that voice" Arthur said suddenly as he stood up.

"Lintilla!"
"Arthur!"

"Why, after we left Grontathor, I never thought I would see you!" Arthu said rushing forward.
"You know her Arthur?"
"Of course! she and her, ah, 'sisters' saved me on that blasted bird planet.   But, what are you doing here Lintilla?"
"Hiding, the Galactic police was determined to hunt down and nullify all of my clones, I gathered what few survivors I could and escaped in an emergency Infinite Importability drive."
"No wonder you ended up in such a wierd place" Arthur sighed"

"Weird? I find it fascinating! Ive been here over a year and have discovered some of the most amazing sites!  I was just about to star excavating this valley when I found you and your friends, here be usefull and grab a pick ax to help!"
"Not me thank you, Ive had my fill of caves." Arthur said.
"Oh come on Arthur, here i'll help" Trillan said
"Why not, It will give us something to do for now" For said picking up a pickax as well.

"Wonderful! Ive got some more supplies in my wagon here, we really should start setting up a site, and, make it a bit protected and fortified, these are not friendly lands"

"Why is it, no mater where I go, NO ONE is happy to see me" he sighed
-----------------
EDIT: i8m switching Slartibartfast with Marvin, mostly because I can see him swinging an ax and chopping down trees as an old man,.

LegoLord:
Cool, an alternate storyline.  Interesting.  I'll be keeping up with this.

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