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Author Topic: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?  (Read 66194 times)

Village_Idiot

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #195 on: April 27, 2009, 03:32:53 pm »

Oh, I do get noble couples, I just don't manage to get them to last 13 years.  I normally give up on forts before that :(
Why would they have to last 13 years? Children pop out every year and with an utility like dwarf manager they can be great pump/siege operators, haulers, or basiscly anything!
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Mister Thou

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #196 on: April 27, 2009, 03:57:25 pm »

I've guess some forts have different fertility rates than others.

One of my champion marksdwarves had 17 children before the my fortress had been around twenty years (not even one of the starting 7), and would have had more had I not disabled children in the init file. I had set my cap to 50 dwarves and ended up with about 120 total, plus about 10 children that had been abducted. I had more children than adults, even without counting the abductees. All this was from only four or five couples, except for some migrant children.

Incidentally, the marksdwarf's title was "The Crystalline Innocence of Loving" which I thought was pretty funny.
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Saer

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #197 on: April 27, 2009, 04:00:49 pm »

I had Elven traders come at the same time as those monkey things, I forget what they are called.
But I thought the monkeys were their pets or something, so I let them through.
They then stole a bunch of crap from me, and I was like >=O afterward. Those dirty elves...
I think I am going to kill them next time I see these elves...
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ProfessorA

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #198 on: April 27, 2009, 04:05:04 pm »

I had Elven traders come at the same time as those monkey things, I forget what they are called.
But I thought the monkeys were their pets or something, so I let them through.
They then stole a bunch of crap from me, and I was like >=O afterward. Those dirty elves...
I think I am going to kill them next time I see these elves...
Rhe-sus-Ma-caque
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TheDJ17

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #199 on: April 27, 2009, 05:36:31 pm »

I had Elven traders come at the same time as those monkey things, I forget what they are called.
But I thought the monkeys were their pets or something, so I let them through.
They then stole a bunch of crap from me, and I was like >=O afterward. Those dirty elves...
I think I am going to kill them next time I see these elves...
Rhe-sus-Ma-caque

To be fair that is A LOT of hyphens.
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The spinning =<*Free Form Jazz*>= strikes the Poster in all the senses, ya' dig, utterly blowing the mind!
The Status Quo has been struck down!

Mount

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #200 on: April 27, 2009, 05:42:14 pm »

I had Elven traders come at the same time as those monkey things, I forget what they are called.
But I thought the monkeys were their pets or something, so I let them through.
They then stole a bunch of crap from me, and I was like >=O afterward. Those dirty elves...
I think I am going to kill them next time I see these elves...
Rhe-sus-Ma-caque

Unless a sword/axedwarf gets to 'em.. then it's rhesus pieces...

Smew

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #201 on: April 27, 2009, 07:30:47 pm »

I had Elven traders come at the same time as those monkey things, I forget what they are called.
But I thought the monkeys were their pets or something, so I let them through.
They then stole a bunch of crap from me, and I was like >=O afterward. Those dirty elves...
I think I am going to kill them next time I see these elves...
Rhe-sus-Ma-caque

Unless a sword/axedwarf gets to 'em.. then it's rhesus pieces...
I should really sig that, but I refuse on the grounds that... well, I have no grounds, but I just refuse.

Tradanbattlan

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #202 on: April 27, 2009, 08:48:20 pm »

I had Elven traders come at the same time as those monkey things, I forget what they are called.
But I thought the monkeys were their pets or something, so I let them through.
They then stole a bunch of crap from me, and I was like >=O afterward. Those dirty elves...
I think I am going to kill them next time I see these elves...
Rhe-sus-Ma-caque

Unless a sword/axedwarf gets to 'em.. then it's rhesus pieces...
I should really sig that, but I refuse on the grounds that... well, I have no grounds, but I just refuse.
Smew cancels React To Pun: In a fey mood.

Smew

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #203 on: April 29, 2009, 01:04:04 am »

I had Elven traders come at the same time as those monkey things, I forget what they are called.
But I thought the monkeys were their pets or something, so I let them through.
They then stole a bunch of crap from me, and I was like >=O afterward. Those dirty elves...
I think I am going to kill them next time I see these elves...
Rhe-sus-Ma-caque

Unless a sword/axedwarf gets to 'em.. then it's rhesus pieces...
I should really sig that, but I refuse on the grounds that... well, I have no grounds, but I just refuse.
Smew cancels React To Pun: In a fey mood.
I present to you, this!
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Nerserus

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #204 on: April 29, 2009, 04:56:12 am »

I have a Lizardman who detests lizards. OH THE IRONY!
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stack of 10 prepared dragonfly brains - I'm trying to imagine what's more funny: a dwarf popping a tiny dragonfly brain into his mouth for a snack, the butcher who actually prepared this feast, or the brave hunter who ventured out into the wilderness and returned with this bounty.

Phazer

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #205 on: April 29, 2009, 08:40:31 am »

wow must be funny to hate youreself or find youreself disgusting :)
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Dragon: My plan is foolproof! Those foolish dwarves cannot resist walking near lava! If I hop in, then they won't know what hit them! I'll just- AH! OH GOD! I WASTED MY LIFE!

Mister Thou

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #206 on: April 29, 2009, 10:48:55 am »

not really :'(
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Phazer

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #207 on: April 29, 2009, 10:51:49 am »

well couldnt say i was too serious and if you find youreself disgusting you maybe should visit a psychian or whatever you call it
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Dragon: My plan is foolproof! Those foolish dwarves cannot resist walking near lava! If I hop in, then they won't know what hit them! I'll just- AH! OH GOD! I WASTED MY LIFE!

FaultyLogic

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #208 on: April 29, 2009, 01:17:37 pm »

On an old fort of mine, there was a dragon attack. A few dwarves were milling about outside when it happened, and I quickly ordered everyone inside. Watching with excitement as the dragon approached my defences, I saw that one dwarf had remained behind the others. It was my expedition leader. She had sentimental value, as she was married to the awesome clerk and was pretty awesome herself.

She was standing on a clifftop, watching the last of the other dwarves run into the fort entrance below her. The dragon rushed towards her. She stood frozen at the same spot while my excitement turned into horror. The dragon ran up on the cliff and spewed a cone of firey death towards the dwarf, wich suddenly turned and lept of the opposite end of the cliff, just barely evading the dragonbreath. Quickly, she ran into the fort with the dragon close behind. Here ends the epicness, as a dwarven caravan guard runs out to meet the dragon and kills it single-handedly.
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"It's unpossible!"

geoduck

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Re: One-in-a-million moments you've witnessed?
« Reply #209 on: April 29, 2009, 02:00:31 pm »

I just had my first dragon attack. I say "attack", but when I found the dragon at the very edge of the world, and looKed at it, the description included the word "Unconscious". Huh? Sure enough, it had taken an eye injury and was down. There were no dwarfs nearby, so the only thing I can figure is that one of my catapult-operators must have gotten off a (ahem) million-to-one lucky shot while practicing. (The dragon wasn't even on the same Z-level as the 'pult, but was near the edge of the area where many of the practice rocks pile up..)
I mobilized my entire army, dashed them out to the site, and they beat the dragon to death without taking a scratch.
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