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[IncompetentFortressMaker]

That'll ruin your fort, all right.

[Magistrum]

Are you truly an overseer if you never flooded your fortress building waterworks, though?

[nezclaw]

Are you truly an overseer if you never flooded your fortress building waterworks, though?

tip: never dig a channel straight from the river without installing floodgates.

[Pvt. Pirate]

Are you truly an overseer if you never flooded your fortress building waterworks, though?

tip: never dig a channel straight from the river without installing floodgates.

i always use drawbridges for this, because they cannot be blocked by items.

[Atarlost]

I couldn't figure out why my expeditions started getting stuck when I assigned war animals. 

I had all access points to the surface tightly closed. 

[Dragofire]

I forgot that you could'nt cage pets so got infuriated trying to cage this one cat that some random fish dissector had as a pet. Needless to say i stuck both in a room full of spikes and pulled the lever 600 times.

[nezclaw]

somehow i accidentally deleted the pheobus tileset when i was trying to switch to the default tileset for Dawnthunder purposes. i have a hard time visualizing the surface with the default set.

also i'm not sure if i mentioned this or not, but i found out that i had accidentally been playing on 43.05 instead of 44.12 a while back.

that's weird. i went into the lnp and pheobus is there. it's just not showing up on the list.

[mightymushroom]

I have a cross post between "Face Palm" and "What's going on?" threads.

I'm more worried whether I have sufficient drainage when I flip the second lever to power up the misty waterfall in the temple. My engineers say it'll be fine, but that's what they said about the waterwheel sluice, too.

From the conclusions of the Soggy Aftermath Committee: "Real time flow readings from the outlet show that the drain was working as predicted and could have accommodated more. It was the pump stack that was overpowered, spraying water well beyond the containment radius of the waterfall feature."

I've just experienced a practical lesson in how pressure puts water in the 'dorfy nearest' tile, and NOT in the downmost available tile. The inadvertent good news is that the inlet also had less pressure from the brook than anticipated, due to my same misapprehension farther upstream. The two failures partially cancelled each other and made it a very slow flood.

[TheCrimsonDM]

Spent the past two or three years in game trying to make axes so someone would cut down some trees on the surface. Still had plenty of wood so it wasn't a big concern, but it was weird that no one would cut down a single tree so I could build a surface tavern. Lo and behold I realize that not a single dwarf had the wood cutting skill enabled because my only wood cutter died in a temple brawl years ago... needless to say, I had my facepalm moment.

At least i have a lot of axes now...

[KaleNipClaw]

I ordered a dwarf to dig a lone, post-channeling wall. It was load-bearing, of course. There was blood. Thankfully I have a medical dwarf. Not-so-thankfully, that dwarf is also my cleaner.

[KaleNipClaw]

Okay, so I am officially the worst Overseer ever. I embarked in an evil Tundra, and some Profane Ash drifted by. Yeah, the stuff that zombifies and kills. I didn't reactivate the Civilian Alert. Everyone died. Fun in a couple of days.

[Steedat]

First Weretortoise Attack:
Me: "Uh-oh, looks like trouble. Better seal the fort..."
*First bridge raises. Second bridge...retracts.*
Me: "...Oh crap."
(Full disclosure, I DFHack-'exterminated' the tortoise; I didn't want to lose the fort to a bone-headed mistake.)

Second Weretortoise Attack:
Me: "Again? Good thing I fixed those bridges."
*First bridge raises*
*Second bridge raises*
*Weretortoise paths through a diagonal crack in the wall next to the second bridge*
Me: "Son of a bi-"

One Month Later
Me: "Okay, bridges are right, walls are secure. Three dwarves dead, but all of the potentially infected are quarantined in 'hospital' cells. Oh look, the dwarven caravan is here."
*Urist McWrong-Place-Wrong-Time cancels Haul Item: interrupted by weretortoise Planter*
Me: "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFU-"
(I lost 4 more dwarves, including a very good broker and legendary weaver, not including the veteran planter-turned-ninja turtle)

[mwanafalsafa]

Two years on, I've had so many visitors petition to join my fort for soldiery that (aside from the dwarf captains) I have two full squads' worth of mercenaries training full-time. Thus far I've defeated a giant, a cyclops, and two (admittedly small) goblin sieges with zero casualties. Not sure if it is norma to get this many mercenaries or if it's a quirk of my fort's location/world.

Edit: Actually, the face-palm is that I meant to post this in the 'What's going on in your fortress' thread.

[Magistrum]

Spent five months piercing an aquifer and setting up the main staircase just mine a room directly under it like a fool before I could breach the caverns.
May Armok give me strength. Or scuba miners.

[HungThir]

Spent five months piercing an aquifer and setting up the main staircase just mine a room directly under it like a fool before I could breach the caverns.

these days i use marker-only designations to spell out "NO DIG" in big letters on the level under the aquifer as soon as i bust through