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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 1455399 times)

Pvt. Pirate

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10680 on: December 30, 2019, 04:10:15 pm »

i tapped the brook carefully, leading the water ~50 tiles through an underground aqueduct to a place where it can be pumped into a small cistern and a well above it.
i even installed two drawbridges to conveniently being able to close the aqueduct at the brook or shortly before the pump... but i put the levers next to the pump, so the titam went in and destroyed the pump and both levers while both gates were open and the aqueduct is flooded.
i got no easy way of setting it dry again to reenable the gates.
i'll have to either put a windmill or waterwheel at the brook and install a series of pumps there or abandon that cistern and well and only keep tha aqueduct and keep the aqueduct levers inside the fort this time.
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doublestrafe

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10681 on: January 01, 2020, 03:05:44 am »

I finally trapped the giant cave spider who had been eating my monster slayers. With careful preparation, lots of debugging, and much stealing from Reddit posts, I triumphantly unveiled a fully automated silk farm, and set it to work. After a year or so, however, I discovered that the spider had gotten the last laugh.

The inventory screen of every one of my dwarves is now approximately:
≡Relicsparkle the Bulbous Dominion's giant cave spid
☼Relicsparkle the Bulbous Dominion's giant cave spid
≡Relicsparkle the Bulbous Dominion's giant cave spid
Relicsparkle the Bulbous Dominion's giant cave spide
-Relicsparkle the Bulbous Dominion's giant cave spid
☼Relicsparkle the Bulbous Dominion's giant cave spid
≡Relicsparkle the Bulbous Dominion's giant cave spid

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darkhog

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10682 on: January 10, 2020, 04:13:13 pm »

Time for my one. Minor one, but still. After years or so of using Dwarf Therapist to set up labors (because Toady's system sucks for that), I've learning about DFHack having such functionality already (u->l (small L) if you're interested:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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axemangeorge

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10683 on: January 10, 2020, 09:14:48 pm »

Coming back to DF after 2-ish years' absence. I founded a fairly quiet fort with a healthy steel industry, studied dfwiki on how to properly outfit my military. After a few minor skirmishes with greenskins and knife-ears, developed a squad -- the Beardrippers -- of 8 Axe Lords and 2 not-quite-legendary soldiers. I decided to explore the Missions > Raid possibilities.

On my first raid, a sneak & steal, the Beardrippers were instructed to steal treasure. A week or later they returned triumphant, leading a train of 9 tame beak dogs, carrying some kind of glass banjo and a pair of troll fur pants.

In my mind, the dialogue went something like this:

Mayor: "We sent you to steal treasure and you come back with this -- garbage?"

Cutter (squad leader, legendary Axe Lord): "No, wait -- we stole these right out of the goblin leader's bedroom. Feel them! They're SO SOFT."

Mayor: "Seriously? Wait -- they ARE really soft..."

The mayor commandeered the troll fur pants (which I imagined were too large, so he had them sort of lapped over the rope he used as a belt).

Four or five missions later, I had a Legendary armorsmith cranking out unparalleled gear. I decided to change the Beardrippers' uniform and send them on another mission. I'm not sure exactly what I did wrong. The upshot is, the entire squad of Beardrippers marched off to conquer a really big greenskin settlement stark naked, hi-hoing as they stomped off into the sunset. Weeks later, two wild-eyed, mud-spattered, starving refugees staggered back to the fort. Still naked.
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Schmaven

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10684 on: January 12, 2020, 11:43:57 am »

I just had a cave-in right over my quantum stockpiles.  Thousands of stone lost forever... Time to dig more extra rooms I suppose.

One insight from this, is that FPS has been completely unaffected.  So sheer # of stones (at least all on 1 tile) does not appear to affect FPS 1 way or another.  Could be due to them not wearing out like clothing / other items.

Edit: The stones were found, still all on 1 tile, but 9 spaces over. 
« Last Edit: January 12, 2020, 11:51:05 am by Schmaven »
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delphonso

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10685 on: January 14, 2020, 07:44:31 am »

Did the stones...dodge?

axemangeorge

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10686 on: January 14, 2020, 08:23:42 am »

Migrant wave brought in a handful of PTSD-raddled twitchy-eyed refugees from the retired fort Tangledstockade -- all gaunt & harrowed by the tragic nightmares their lives had become. You can sorta tell it's going to be bad when the migrant walks onto the map and his first task is Go To Meeting -- unless there's some secret Alcoholics Anonymous session taking place behind the pig tail cloth bins.

Since Dwarf Therapist doesn't actually provide therapy, yet, and I've never acquired the skill of saving a dwarf from the brink of utter madness (100k stress?!?), I immediately triaged them. I imagine the Mayor standing out front with a clipboard: "So, have you ever been forced to endure the decomposition of a friend's corpse? How many times have you been jailed for starting a brawl?" etc.

One poor migrant, Urist McLoony, revealed he'd been a former resident of (no exaggeration) 10 settlements. "Former resident of... and... and... AND... also... you must be... seriously?... wait slow down I'm running out of paper here..." Two entire screens of negative thoughts. The Mayor stamped McLoony's travel papers and immediately exiled him -- now the former resident of 11 settlements. Not without sympathy, but definitely without mercy.

Come to think of it. that's probably where the greenskins recruit the race-traitor dwarves who've consistently been the worst opposition I've faced during sieges.
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Eschar

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10687 on: January 14, 2020, 05:19:00 pm »

Did the stones...dodge?

It's probably a result of some sort of check to prevent objects from being in the same place that can't be, similar to the principle behind the magma piston.
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Bumber

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10688 on: January 15, 2020, 12:26:59 am »

I'm pretty sure cave-in dust pushes stuff. Odd that they'd all end up on the same tile, though.
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Schmaven

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10689 on: January 15, 2020, 06:13:51 am »

I'm pretty sure cave-in dust pushes stuff. Odd that they'd all end up on the same tile, though.

They all started on the same tile, so it seems cave-in dust moves things in a well defined manner.  It would have been absolute chaos if all 1500+ of the stone all ended up on different tiles.
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Troll_Kaiser177

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10690 on: January 29, 2020, 12:55:52 pm »

Been training a unit of dwarves for about two years now. Just had a group of migrants come in so I thought 'Why not make another group of Dwarves and try to make them wrestlers or something?'

Shortly afterwards I found a cute little Goblin pit, and promptly sent out me Dorfs to take 'ehm out.

Turns out I sent the unarmed and useless migrants.

What have I done  :'(
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darkhog

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10691 on: January 29, 2020, 01:49:14 pm »

Well, if any of them returns, their combat skills will be legendary.
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Robsoie

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10692 on: February 07, 2020, 06:31:56 pm »

When you play too much Dwarf Fortress you're starting to have Urist reactions yourself.
Facepalm of the day for myself :D
I had started a fortress, the underground part can be accessed from ramps, that's the important point for the problem, at some point after cutting several trees i started as usual to see holes in the ground once i moved the view 1 level up (i have rooms and tunnels just below) where said trees were.

So i ordered my dwarves to make floor tiles over all those holes just in case something nasty came as it would just then have to jump in a hole and land into my underground structures.

Then more time moved on, i noticed some work i had ordered long time ago weren't done anymore, despite tools required and specialist dwarves were still alive both outside and inside the fortress there were dwarves starting to be unable to feed and to drink for reason i couldn't understand.

After more time i was starting to get ready to post a bug report on mantis.
Then i saw.

When my dwarves had built floor over all of the holes i pointed them too, they also put floors over the ramps.
... man i felt like Urist :D
« Last Edit: February 07, 2020, 06:36:16 pm by Robsoie »
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