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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 1525047 times)

Nagidal

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10725 on: May 20, 2020, 09:55:02 pm »

I wanted to geld a horse:

the Gelder Ingish ┼muzol is fighting!
The stray horse kicks the gelder in the head with his left rear hoof,
bruising the muscle, bruising the skull through the (pig tail hood)!

The gelder has been knocked unconscious!
The force pulls the neck, tearing apart the fat and bruising the muscle
and tearing apart the upper spine's nervous tissue!
A tendon in the upper spine has been torn!

The gelder falls over.
The gelder regains consciousness.
The gelder is no longer stunned.
Ingish ┼muzol, Gelder has been found dead.


 :-\ The stray horse now has a name: IgŰrlitast (Rivertorch)
« Last Edit: May 20, 2020, 10:05:40 pm by Nagidal »
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Eschar

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10726 on: May 20, 2020, 09:59:49 pm »

Wait a minute, what wound did he die from if the first blow to the head didn't kill him? He woke up from the unconsciousness, so it wasn't fatal, and that wound "only" gave him a spinal injury.
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"Continue struggling, laws of physics be darned."
 - NRDL
"What, are you stupid or something? Every one of the snake's bones is crushed! Its internal organs are torn apart! There is no way you can - (6) You resuscitate the snake."
- Gatleos

Nagidal

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10727 on: May 20, 2020, 10:03:26 pm »

It seems so. It happened off-screen, so I don't know what exactly killed him. But would the horse get a nickname just to kick a dwarf? Plus, tearing apart the upper spine's nervous tissue is quite deadly, isn't it? Ingish ┼muzol's memorial slab at his grave says: Suffocated, slain by the horse Rivertorches in the year 127.
« Last Edit: May 20, 2020, 10:14:43 pm by Nagidal »
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I stream most of my DF sessions: gaming.youtube/nagidal146, they are archived on my youtube channel. (Dwarf Fortress Tutorials)

Eschar

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10728 on: May 20, 2020, 11:25:20 pm »

True, I think some spinal injuries lead to suffocation.
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"Continue struggling, laws of physics be darned."
 - NRDL
"What, are you stupid or something? Every one of the snake's bones is crushed! Its internal organs are torn apart! There is no way you can - (6) You resuscitate the snake."
- Gatleos

Mathel

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10729 on: May 21, 2020, 05:00:51 am »

Specificaly, tearing upper spine nervous tissue always leads to disabling arms and legs and suffocation, bruising it sometimes leads to it.

Tearing middle spine nervous tissue disables arms and legs, tearing lower spine nervous tissue disables legs.
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The shield is mightier than the sword.
Urge to drink milk while eating steak wrapped with bacon rising...
Outer planes are not subject to any laws of physics that would prevent them from doing their job.

Romeofalling

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10730 on: May 21, 2020, 12:40:20 pm »

A pun based facepalm, rather than the usual kind.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Eschar

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10731 on: May 21, 2020, 12:42:54 pm »

A pun based facepalm, rather than the usual kind.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Eschar cancels Post: Anguish.
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"Continue struggling, laws of physics be darned."
 - NRDL
"What, are you stupid or something? Every one of the snake's bones is crushed! Its internal organs are torn apart! There is no way you can - (6) You resuscitate the snake."
- Gatleos

pisskop

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10732 on: May 21, 2020, 04:46:50 pm »

A pun based facepalm, rather than the usual kind.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Do you know the 9 steps of using a screwdriver?  The US military does.  And they had me memorize it.



My own face palm is my new migrant.  Adequate diagnostician, adequate bone doctor, competent wound dresser, Adequate surgeon, etc.  Professional Gelder.

Like - doc - what is your specialty again?
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Romeofalling

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10733 on: May 22, 2020, 02:32:59 pm »

I could only locate up to 6 on the internet. Now I insist on knowing what the 9 steps are.

Had two facepalms yesterday, one at the game mechanics, the other at my own foolishness.

I normally try to keep leadership positions for the founding dwarves,  but the migration wave included a Legendary Judge of Intent, so I gave him Expedition Leader status before he even finished arriving. This apparently angered the Outpost Liason, who immediately left, disappointed. ~facepalm~

While selecting items to trade at the depot that same day, I get distracted and decide to turn an unused corner into a temporary hospital. Hospitals, of course, need soap, which needs fat. I commence with the ceremonial slaying of the spare male cat, get back to trading, and by the time I look again, the fat has been rendered into tallow, and the tallow has been rendered into biscuits (cat tallow and dwarven ale, mmm, tasty).

Okay, no problem, I'll just kill some local wildlife....oh, look, my hunting dog attacked this elephant. She'll do. So I grab a pile of migrants, turn them into an archer squad and a melee squad, and immediately send them, without armor, weapons, or training, to go kill that elephant.

THREE MONTHS LATER, the scrum is still going on, with the elephant in the center, getting pummeled uselessly, when the elf caravan shows up, travels directly through the elephant situation without blinking an eye. I buy everything they brought in exchange for 2 stacks of biscuits (sheep cheese and dwarven beer, which sounds more like cheese sticks to me, and the cat tallow biscuits).

About three minutes later, my dorfs finally kill the elephant.  I check the logs, and it turns out that they all took a break, equipped themselves with those gorram grown elven blades, and took out the beast in maybe 4 strikes.

Goddammit.
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knutor

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10734 on: May 26, 2020, 08:43:54 pm »

Vile Force Arrives, ohh boy its a biggie.
Dorfs all sent into safety burrow with Civ alert in M menu.
Pan to drawbridge lever, Pull it...
wait a sec.
FACEPALM.
Stressed out dorf, disassembled the drawbridge lever!
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"I don't often drink Mead, but when I do... I prefer Dee Eef's.  -The most interesting Dwarf in the World.  Stay thirsty, my friend.
Shark Dentistry, looking in the Raws.

Kyubee

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10735 on: May 26, 2020, 09:19:51 pm »

I had a facepalm earlier when a vile force of darkness arrived (Luckily it was one of those "arrives and instantly leaves" ones), and I forgot to build a drawbridge, cage traps, or a military force at all. If it wasnt a false alarm, my fort would have fallen in minutes.
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The litten is wandering around the dump now, occasionally exploding.

knutor

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10736 on: May 28, 2020, 12:57:52 am »

I've gotten a couple of those false alarm Vile Forces visits, too, but in my last fort. I've begun hesitating now, to get their full transition onto map, before raising the alarms. Dunno if it changes things.

That embark, they always arrived at same place, so, I laid a cave croc pit, pool, right there, with one ramp, surrounded by stonefall traps, to help goblins dive in. For some reason they always leave a scout malingering in a pond. This worked for a bit, actually got two crocs to earn unique names, before they got wiped out.

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"I don't often drink Mead, but when I do... I prefer Dee Eef's.  -The most interesting Dwarf in the World.  Stay thirsty, my friend.
Shark Dentistry, looking in the Raws.

FreeSpace

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10737 on: May 29, 2020, 09:05:13 am »

I'm a new player so to say.

After only 3 1/2 ingame-years I found out how to make iron/metal...
I don't know how my fortress survived that long.
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knutor

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10738 on: May 29, 2020, 03:44:43 pm »

FreeSpace, I feel your pain.

When I started I kept thinking Charcoal was for cooking, I never looked at it as coal. Took me forever to operate a smelter. Kept digging, and digging for Bituminous Coal. Quit many times, thinking my embark was bad, it had no coal.
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"I don't often drink Mead, but when I do... I prefer Dee Eef's.  -The most interesting Dwarf in the World.  Stay thirsty, my friend.
Shark Dentistry, looking in the Raws.

Thon

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Re: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress
« Reply #10739 on: May 31, 2020, 08:55:05 am »

Pretty much any time I'm walling off cleaned mineshafts and forgetting I'm playing dwarf fortress. I mean... why haul the damn bricks two extra meters just so you can wall yourself off in an abandoned mineshaft. Did some experiments in my earlier days. Letting them wall themselves off, does not clean the genepool to breed smarter dwarves, nor spectres of restless dwarves constantly harassing living ones. Placing memorials on the correct side of the walled mineshaft dedicated to dwarf who lost his life sealing it for the sake of my FPS doesn't help either.

Nowadays, I just facepalm, release the idiot and remember to designate and suspend wall construction on where they shouldn't stand.
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