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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2126553 times)

Egregius

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1590 on: May 02, 2010, 06:29:06 pm »

What's Kraftwerk got to do with it?
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Every time I see the letter c I think of cats, then genocide, then delicious stew.

Djohaal

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1591 on: May 02, 2010, 09:47:57 pm »

What's Kraftwerk got to do with it?

His screename is Kraftwerk, so I think he was talking to himself....

And another fan of the crazy germans? *highfives Kraftwerk (the user)*
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I really want that one as a "when". I want "grubs", and "virgin woman" to turn into a dragon. and monkey children to suddenly sprout wings. And I want the Dwarven Mutant Academy to only gain their powers upon reaching puberty. I also have a whole host of odd creatures that only make sense if I divide them into children and adults.

Also, tadpoles.

Vercingetorix

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1592 on: May 03, 2010, 12:06:05 am »

I was wondering why my military had not been equipped with its armor...

...and then found out the arsenal dwarf was in the military.
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Do you always look at it in ASCII?

You get used to it, I don't even see the ASCII.  All I see is blacksmith, miner, goblin.

Snoopicus

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1593 on: May 03, 2010, 04:03:57 am »

having 40 dwarfs walk off a cliff,
i got a Urist McLemming has collided with an obstacle
i paused and went to investigate and found that my dwarfs were trying to retrive some loot from the top of a waterfall, were pushed off and fell 16 z-levels to their deaths.
the bottom of the waterfall is littered with their exploded corpes.
their last thought was "Has been confronted by a lovely waterfall lately"

This has got to be the coolest way I've seen to get Dwarf's to kill themselves without needing to conscript them. I love it.
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Snoopicus: What is the kill radius of lava heat?
Snugglybear: I''ve seen it, I think, kill dudes one level above it. But the guy was falling into it at the time, as a dwarven sacrifice. So it''s hard to say.

Neyvn

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1594 on: May 03, 2010, 07:36:42 am »

Sigh... I accidentally removed a bed when a Cavein Victim was receiving some Constant (and I mean CONSTANT) Surgery by my doc. He was then constantly cared for so he couldn't be moved, but was not fed or sated. So he ended up dieing on me. Damn it...
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Quote from: Ubiq
Broker: Wasn't there an ambush squad here just a second ago?
Merchant: I don't know what you're talking about. Do you want this goblin ankle bone amulet or not?
My LIVESTREAM. I'm Aussie, so not everything is clean. Least it works...

Chronas

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1595 on: May 03, 2010, 07:54:59 am »

Sigh... I accidentally removed a bed when a Cavein Victim was receiving some Constant (and I mean CONSTANT) Surgery by my doc. He was then constantly cared for so he couldn't be moved, but was not fed or sated. So he ended up dieing on me. Damn it...
at least it got him out of the way
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He he he.  Yeah, it almost looks done...  alas...  those who are in your teens, hold on until your twenties...  those in your twenties, your thirties...  others, cling to life as you are able...
It should be pretty fun though.

GHudston

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1596 on: May 03, 2010, 08:22:33 am »

I had just started up my first fortress where my dwarves hadn't died from starvation/dehydration/insanity (yet), I was getting immigrants and thigns were going well so I figured that I'd give some metalworking a go.

I channeled out a pit underneath a large room and then carefully planned out a pipe for the magma to flow down. I even went so far as to include fortifications to stop the imps from killing everyone inside my fortress (After they killed my fisherman, and then killed the next 3 dwarves that tried to take the fishermans shoes... I was being extra careful!)

Everything went amazingly well, noone burne dup in the magma and the pit under the forge room had filled up without flooding the room above. Everything was going great... until I tried to be clever.

I was using stonesense so I wanted to make my fort look cool; I intended to channel out walkways with floor grates on that you could see the magma through. I didn't know that grates didn't support floor tiles and the section where my forge had been built caved in, taking my only anvil with it. I had to abandon after the third caravan turned up without any anvils to trade. Fun!

P.S. This is my first post here and I just wanted to say that you should all be ashamed of yourselves. This game is like crack! I want my life back!
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nekoexmachina

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1597 on: May 03, 2010, 08:57:56 am »

My second militia commander, died just like the first one, and that's soooo facepalm-way of death. I command all the sqads to station near my fortress enter. Militia commander second time is running OUT and chasing some shitty rabbit, running after him for the WHOLE map, and of course facing the siege by himself.
while i was writing this, couple of my swordsdwarfs followed the commander.
I do not get the new military system, how do i disallow my mil running after wild animals?
I hate those morrons. -_-
Edit: moron am i. I'm playing with genesis mod, and it seems that
Quote
Shroom Dwarves: It is said that if you eat too many mushrooms and drink too much mushroom wine, your baby will be a Mushroom dwarf. These guys are extremely cheerful, sometimes even maniacal and crazy. They cannot learn as fast as other dwarves, but they can give births to multiple babies and they mature very fast. Their lowered vision doesn't stop them from trying to get anywhere you do not want them, just to see what's up with that place.
*facepalm*
« Last Edit: May 03, 2010, 09:47:13 am by nekoexmachina »
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Whenever i read the "doesn't care about anything anymore" line, i instantly imagine a dwarf, sitting alone on a swing set. Just slowly rocking back and forth, somberly staring at the ground, and stopping every once in a while to sigh.
It's mildly depressing.

Greiger

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1598 on: May 03, 2010, 09:37:00 am »

Greiger has grown attached to Whitecastle, a gneiss fortress.

The fortress of Whitecastle has crashed!

Nooooooooooooooooooooo!

I am reloading and saving every few days.  I am going to figure out why it's crashing and work around it.  My best guess is that the military decided to start hating me after my last success.

The facepalm?  Thinking the military was actually working...
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Disclaimer: Not responsible for dwarven deaths from the use or misuse of this post.
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I don't need friends!! I've got knives!!!

Corona688

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1599 on: May 03, 2010, 12:01:33 pm »

I had a long-lasting fort that breached the second cavern before the first.  A legendary monster'd been lurkin down there for years (a lol-made-of-salt invincible one, didn't bother fighting it) cutting me off from all the underground wood.  When I accidentally breached the second cavern layer (how I'd avoided hitting it at all through 40 z layers of extensive mining was a minor miracle, I was 2 walls away from it on several levels) I was elated and set to woodcutting full-force...  and discovered layers 1 and 2 were connected.  nothing could stop the lolsalt monster.  whole fort down the toilet.
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You never know when you might need a berserk dwarf to set loose somewhere.

Neyvn

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1600 on: May 03, 2010, 03:42:43 pm »

Sigh... I accidentally removed a bed when a Cavein Victim was receiving some Constant (and I mean CONSTANT) Surgery by my doc. He was then constantly cared for so he couldn't be moved, but was not fed or sated. So he ended up dieing on me. Damn it...
at least it got him out of the way
He was a Legend Miner/Mason... Well like by half the Fort...
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Quote from: Ubiq
Broker: Wasn't there an ambush squad here just a second ago?
Merchant: I don't know what you're talking about. Do you want this goblin ankle bone amulet or not?
My LIVESTREAM. I'm Aussie, so not everything is clean. Least it works...

nekoexmachina

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1601 on: May 03, 2010, 04:02:54 pm »

Again, siege. Almost all the attackers are just standing down near their starting point. And one ogre comes inside of my fortress through the water-system.
All my legendary-dwarfs are killed, and because of spamming messages 'Urist can not bury someone: inaccessible area' i mention it only after ~10 minutes.
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Whenever i read the "doesn't care about anything anymore" line, i instantly imagine a dwarf, sitting alone on a swing set. Just slowly rocking back and forth, somberly staring at the ground, and stopping every once in a while to sigh.
It's mildly depressing.

darksergio

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1602 on: May 03, 2010, 10:21:07 pm »

breaching hell and trying to fight again it whit just adamantine sword and steel armor my dwarf are going to have to clean the outpost for months
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Clear skies with a chance of FLAMIN' RAIN!

Sarvesh Mossbeard

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1603 on: May 04, 2010, 07:46:10 am »

I've just had my first goblin ambush. I was all estasic at the idea of wiping them out with my 2 dwarves...

They ran when they saw them coming... with 30 war dogs.
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You forgot a detail: Dorfs get webbed in GCS webs and trigger traps. Right now we have some 12 caged dwarves, including you.

Kidiri

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1604 on: May 04, 2010, 08:10:41 am »

Greiger has grown attached to Whitecastle, a gneiss fortress.

The fortress of Whitecastle has crashed!

Nooooooooooooooooooooo!

I am reloading and saving every few days.  I am going to figure out why it's crashing and work around it.  My best guess is that the military decided to start hating me after my last success.

The facepalm?  Thinking the military was actually working...
Maybe it's the smelting bug?
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Veni, Vidi, Pompeii.
Soylent Green is kittens!
Sometimes, when my Dorfs are exceptionally stupid again, I wonder what exactly the [INTELLIGENT]-tag does.
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