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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 1510769 times)

PijanySmok

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MonkeyHead

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5506 on: December 23, 2011, 05:43:00 pm »

No offence, but on this forum most of us tend to aim for quite a high standard of literacy, and most of us work to avoid many of the "crazy internet" typing conventions you have included.
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zubb2

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5507 on: December 23, 2011, 10:43:06 pm »

Dorf fortress is home of not only dorfs but grammer nazis and necro.Hehehe hu ha and whatnot.

They go like this,HAIL GRAMMER!

A facething moment I had was that whole built a retracting bridge instead of closeing drawbridge thing and well it did not function as a door.

When I first started playing a month or 2 ago I lost most of my dorfs <over multiple forts> to being crushed by drawbridges while IMPATIENTLY waiting RIGHT AT THE FRICKING DOOR for me to open it.

EDIT:head of a new page :) smilyface
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Eoganachta

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5508 on: December 23, 2011, 11:04:26 pm »

Perhaps I should have not included my magma evaporating chamber as part of my PANIC burrow.
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Theifofdreams

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5509 on: December 24, 2011, 04:55:47 am »

First FB of the fort, and my mostly inexperienced military.
Not that experience mattered... Now that the gate is closed, the smoldering goop is firmly locked outside, and the FB is merrily menacing the more mundane mobs; it is time to train up a new, mostly crossbow oriented, squad or 4, churn out hundreds of bronze bolts, and hopefully manage to set up a suitable vantage point...

Ashsaber

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5510 on: December 24, 2011, 03:30:22 pm »

When two crossbowdwarves patrolling the walls and taking potshots at the Ferric Elves (Fort Defense mod) was enough to break a siege. 2 vs 40, 3 enemy casualties.

They need to be less sober.
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Orky_Boss

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5511 on: December 25, 2011, 07:37:10 pm »

I decided to try my hand at surviving a terrifying biome, and knowing the perils I would face, I made 1 dwarf a skilled swordsman. I went to items and saw a copper battle axe. I thought "He's a swordsdwarf, not an axedwarf!", and proceeded to replace it with a bronze sword.

So I find a great crevice that will funnel any invaders into a confined space in their attempt to get to me, and started digging though the stone, and set a bunch of trees to be cut.

Later, I'm digging to clay so I can start my farm, and I see that the trees aren't being chopped down. I realize that I had taken away the axe that would've been used by the woodsdwarf.
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kasan

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5512 on: December 25, 2011, 08:10:16 pm »

So in one of my 10 active games, I hit a adamantine vein that was 31 z levels in depth. Suffice to say I've not wanted for valuable metal.  I was in the process of making some instruments (20-35k each) for trade when I noticed I had run out of wafers. I'd been smelting them for a while and couldn't figure out what was going on.  I happened to be looking at my hospital trying to figure out how a soldier had managed to get his foot stabbed thought his armor when I saw the color of the sutures he was about to receive.  I panicked for a moment and checked the health screen.   Sure enough, all my missing adamantine strands had been put into the hospital for use.

This lucky soldier became the MVD of my fortress.
http://i.imgur.com/WKwDe.jpg

edit: dear god the quality of that picture is horrible
« Last Edit: December 25, 2011, 08:37:20 pm by kasan »
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Ria Hawk

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5513 on: December 25, 2011, 11:36:39 pm »

Designate a wall to be built where you don't want your dwarves standing around.  Suspend the wall before anyone tries to go build it.  Remove the build order when you don't need it.  Dwarves prefer to stand in clear space over space designated to be walled.

WAT.

WHAT IS THIS.

AUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH!

I could have not lost about eight dorfs to walling accidents...
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krenshala

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5514 on: December 26, 2011, 02:53:19 pm »

So in one of my 10 active games, I hit a adamantine vein that was 31 z levels in depth. Suffice to say I've not wanted for valuable metal.  I was in the process of making some instruments (20-35k each) for trade when I noticed I had run out of wafers. I'd been smelting them for a while and couldn't figure out what was going on.  I happened to be looking at my hospital trying to figure out how a soldier had managed to get his foot stabbed thought his armor when I saw the color of the sutures he was about to receive.  I panicked for a moment and checked the health screen.   Sure enough, all my missing adamantine strands had been put into the hospital for use.

This lucky soldier became the MVD of my fortress.
http://i.imgur.com/WKwDe.jpg

edit: dear god the quality of that picture is horrible
That is called JPEG compression.  JPEG is a lossy format meant for photographs, not computer graphics. ;)  In photos the image quality lost isn't really noticed due to all the rest of the noise from it being a picture of meat-space.  When used for computer graphics, however, noise is added where it normally otherwise isn't, and it can really stand out. ... especially at high compression levels.
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backora900

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5515 on: December 26, 2011, 05:31:44 pm »

The moment when Urist McGrumpy decided to visit my fortress. I noticed him when he was quite unhappy and I wanted to cheer him up (sadly it was too late - happiness about 20). But then I found out...
First he went to my meeting place and complained about lack of chairs (well I admit 2 chairs for 30 dwarfs isn't much :D).
Then he made grudge wit about 20 other dwarfs (still don't know why - perhaps they were stealing his chair).
After that he went on a bridge which was hanged across a volcano.
Next brilliant move was to "throw a tantrum" and destroy this bridge he was standing on. :o

This wasn't like tantrum described on magmawiki.
http://df.magmawiki.com/index.php/DF2010:Tantrum
In fact mood in my fortress went from happy to ecstatic (one dwarf went to happiness about 1600 - from dwarf therapist).

Now I have to chose whether to make him a slab or wait for his ghost (this could be even more fun :D).
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MaximumZero

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5516 on: December 26, 2011, 07:21:34 pm »

The moment when Urist McGrumpy decided to visit my fortress. I noticed him when he was quite unhappy and I wanted to cheer him up (sadly it was too late - happiness about 20). But then I found out...
First he went to my meeting place and complained about lack of chairs (well I admit 2 chairs for 30 dwarfs isn't much :D).
Then he made grudge wit about 20 other dwarfs (still don't know why - perhaps they were stealing his chair).
After that he went on a bridge which was hanged across a volcano.
Next brilliant move was to "throw a tantrum" and destroy this bridge he was standing on. :o

This wasn't like tantrum described on magmawiki.
http://df.magmawiki.com/index.php/DF2010:Tantrum
In fact mood in my fortress went from happy to ecstatic (one dwarf went to happiness about 1600 - from dwarf therapist).

Now I have to chose whether to make him a slab or wait for his ghost (this could be even more fun :D).

That, ser, seems like an anti-facepalm to me.
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Madventurer

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5517 on: December 28, 2011, 11:42:19 am »

Then he made grudge wit about 20 other dwarfs (still don't know why - perhaps they were stealing his chair).

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Then he made grudge wit about 20 other dwarfs (still don't know why - perhaps they were stealing his chair).

GreatWyrmGold

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5518 on: December 28, 2011, 03:42:40 pm »

The moment when Urist McGrumpy decided to visit my fortress. I noticed him when he was quite unhappy and I wanted to cheer him up (sadly it was too late - happiness about 20). But then I found out...
First he went to my meeting place and complained about lack of chairs (well I admit 2 chairs for 30 dwarfs isn't much :D).
Then he made grudge wit about 20 other dwarfs (still don't know why - perhaps they were stealing his chair).
After that he went on a bridge which was hanged across a volcano.
Next brilliant move was to "throw a tantrum" and destroy this bridge he was standing on. :o

This wasn't like tantrum described on magmawiki.
http://df.magmawiki.com/index.php/DF2010:Tantrum
In fact mood in my fortress went from happy to ecstatic (one dwarf went to happiness about 1600 - from dwarf therapist).

Now I have to chose whether to make him a slab or wait for his ghost (this could be even more fun :D).
Wait for the ghost, and let him haunt the moat as a reminder to your dwarves of the dangers of stupidity.
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Theifofdreams

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #5519 on: December 28, 2011, 06:03:09 pm »

Wait for the ghost, and let him haunt the moat as a reminder to your dwarves of the dangers of stupidity.
That's just asking for Urist McGhost to go rip Urist McUnlucky's arm off and try to force it down his throat.
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