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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 1540610 times)

Romesaria

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8625 on: July 08, 2014, 03:23:49 pm »

I did this one yesterday afternoon.

I started a new fortress in a ruined world gen of mine.  I start by digging down a few z-levels and accidentally hitting a cavern.

In an interest to not deal with the cavern nasties just yet, I channeled out the stairs leading down and built a floor over it.

It was a set of up-down stairs, and I didn't realize what I had done until I killed on my miners on the embark.

I hope my next migrant wave has at least one miner in it, to rescue all the dead bodies... :o

P.S. my only carpenter just fell off a construction I was trying to build and offed himself.  I don't even.

And now, that fort has fallen.  It was looking up for a while, but a tantrum spiral started... some child went beserk, so one of my military dwarves offed him, that caused his mother to go beserk...

I pretty much abandoned the fortress once I was down to 1 Dwarf and 5 children.
« Last Edit: July 08, 2014, 05:02:58 pm by Romesaria »
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Shinotsa

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8626 on: July 09, 2014, 06:28:08 pm »

First goblin siege of the new version, my waterfall fortress was fully prepared. A force of eight untrained goblin kidnapees versus a force of five well-armed dwarves (three of which were well trained) who had the advantage of defending. My militia commander ran up to the invading hammerdorf and caved his skull in after dodging an attack. The goblin force was routed immediately, but continued to be slaughtered by the three well-trained militia dwarves. Without sustaining more than a minor injury (which was only worth mentioning because it exacerbated a training wound) the militia dwarves triumphantly marched back in to regroup with their rookie comrades and their loved ones and families... only to come back to an empty town.

It turns out that the townsfolk were so sure that the goblins would be triumphant that they threw themselves off the cliffs and into the churning waters below. The two rookies followed suit, perhaps when their comrade sustained the slight wound, or perhaps at the mere sight of the outnumbering force. Needless to say, Momuz is more than a little peeved that he has to take up civilian duties as a reward for his rousing defeat of the goblins, but those slabs won't carve themselves.
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MrsStick

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8627 on: July 10, 2014, 03:37:24 am »

I'm trying to finish out my fort in v.0.34 before I try the new game. I just replaced my dead broker with a new one whose right upper leg is missing. His lower leg is somehow still attached though...
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My hubby got me into DF...then abandoned his for MineCraft.
Husband has been possessed!
I'm sorry your husband had a strange mood and ended up making a useless trinket out of useless materials without gaining any experience in the process.

Zarathustra30

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8628 on: July 10, 2014, 03:11:27 pm »

Just about shat myself when huge clouds the color of blood started appearing all across my map. They were leaves falling in autumn.
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How did we pass from inns with merry songs and happy music to temples of doom and medieval torture with so much easiness and eagerness??

ArmokGoB

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8629 on: July 10, 2014, 06:03:22 pm »

Just about shat myself when huge clouds the color of blood started appearing all across my map. They were leaves falling in autumn.

The seasons are conspiring against you.
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PDF urist master

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8630 on: July 10, 2014, 09:22:24 pm »

Just about shat myself when huge clouds the color of blood started appearing all across my map. They were leaves falling in autumn.

The seasons are conspiring against you.

it was bound to happen.
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Bumber

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8631 on: July 11, 2014, 12:35:58 am »

Just about shat myself when huge clouds the color of blood started appearing all across my map. They were leaves falling in autumn.
Same happened to me, except with persimmons. It was terrifying. It was inevitable.
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Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. Was this inevitable (Y/y)?

BFEL

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8632 on: July 11, 2014, 12:11:10 pm »

Forgot that slabs require engraving and spent hours wondering why the hell no one would slab the damn miner.
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Spehss _

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8633 on: July 11, 2014, 12:35:57 pm »

First goblin siege of the new version, my waterfall fortress was fully prepared. A force of eight untrained goblin kidnapees versus a force of five well-armed dwarves (three of which were well trained) who had the advantage of defending. My militia commander ran up to the invading hammerdorf and caved his skull in after dodging an attack. The goblin force was routed immediately, but continued to be slaughtered by the three well-trained militia dwarves. Without sustaining more than a minor injury (which was only worth mentioning because it exacerbated a training wound) the militia dwarves triumphantly marched back in to regroup with their rookie comrades and their loved ones and families... only to come back to an empty town.

It turns out that the townsfolk were so sure that the goblins would be triumphant that they threw themselves off the cliffs and into the churning waters below. The two rookies followed suit, perhaps when their comrade sustained the slight wound, or perhaps at the mere sight of the outnumbering force. Needless to say, Momuz is more than a little peeved that he has to take up civilian duties as a reward for his rousing defeat of the goblins, but those slabs won't carve themselves.

So the dwarves got so terrified they jumped off the cliffs? Amazing. This update is amazing.
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Rince Wind

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8634 on: July 11, 2014, 03:05:24 pm »

The wagon broke down on the top of the mountain. So I made a stockpile for everything at the base. Started doing stuff, including forging armor for the soon to be milita. Then it dawned on me, that "everything" includes refuse.
Now I have some XXbismuth bronze greavesXX. Basically 3 whole seta of armor wasted.
Oh well, the magmaforges are online and I will be melting the stuff.
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FaultyLogic

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8635 on: July 11, 2014, 09:58:34 pm »

Started a new fort, with focus on quickly preparing for the inevitable. So I built a small wooden surface fort around the entrance to the real fort below. I kept some workshops and stockpiles in the yard, as well as a pasture while things got sorted out underneath.

In the first winter a band of goblins and humans attacked. I felt well prepared, I ordered the drawbridge to be raised and the marksdwarves to man the battlements. They did as they were told, very briefly, because as soon as they reached their position they climbed on top of the fortification and fell down over on the other side, quickly forming a neat pile of unconscious recruits in front of the
gate. Needless to say, the invaders were horrified and turned and ran.

Later in the following spring a were-ant eater arrived. We raised the drawbridge once more, only to realize we had left one poor soul outside who was fetching water from the river (our cistern was not yet finished). The were-beast quickly pounced upon him and tore him to pieces in an instant. Then it transformed into a friendly, female human who proceeded to climb our walls to hang from the outside of the battlements. Just hanging there until I finally ordered her to be shot, and she just dropped down and ran off.
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Moltar

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8636 on: July 13, 2014, 06:03:32 pm »

Just embarked on a nice magma tube situated just next to a nice waterfall. The waterfall drops about 10z levels and the magma tube starts there too. Started to dig out a fortress on the surface, and within a couple of minutes my mason and planter decided to fight each other (I think). They repeatedly threw each other into the surrounding trees. The planter broke both of her arms and is now completely useless, and the mason shambled around near the waterfall and magma tube. He, of course, fell off the cliff overlooking the magma tube and discovered a vast underground lake of magma 100+z levels below.
After that, my woodcutter got bored after killing a cougar, and thought it might be a good idea to drown himself. My nearby fisherman was overwhelmed with horror and was bit apart by a snapping turtle.

What the hell is wrong with these people?
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Kishmond

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8637 on: July 14, 2014, 02:19:31 am »

Spent a while grinding throwing from dabbling to legendary, than traveled to a town.
Crash.


Sigh.

Sentient Bowtie

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8638 on: July 14, 2014, 02:45:13 pm »

Had some dwarves chop down a couple of willow trees, then saw the amount of wood that produced.
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HawaiianJon

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #8639 on: July 14, 2014, 05:02:34 pm »

I started up Dwarf Mode, got to siege time and forgot the crucial fact of the update...
One layer walls can be climbed...

oh and all my dwarves hadn't been trained in any militant force... because I forgot all about the training factor as I was more amazed with cutting down ALL THE TREES.
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