Dwarf Fortress > DF Dwarf Mode Discussion

The (Dwarven) Darwin Awards: Make your nominations!

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Byakugan01:
What is the stupidest death you have seen a dwarf die of its own volition (IE, you did not tell it to do that)? For me, I had a setup to capture three GCSs I had found in a chasm alcove. I setup the cage traps, stationed a "bait" recruit, catch one of them...and then the hunter who just arrived rushes in, eager to kill naked mole dogs. There were still two gcs left, completely unengaged. Long story short, the mole dog was killed, but then a gcs killed him, and then his stupidity dragged the bait recruit into the fray, and he got wounded and trapped in a cage (chasm dumped...)! Suffice it to say, i refused to give this dwarf a proper burial-instead, i chucked his corpse into the chasm. Only by LUCK did both remaining gcs get caught-i could have had the things rampaging in my fortress in year 2 of my fort, what with the gap the caged recruit left!

Edit: You know, i can actually imagine that hunter shouting "Hey watch this!" as he darted out towards the spiders.

Stargrasper:
Long, highly abridged story short, fire started spreading from the volcano.  Many dwarves died in seconds...I drafted my last three dwarves and ordered them into the underground, stone, and completely fireproof fortress.  Two didn't make it.  Okay, fine, dwarves can't necessarily outrun wildfire.  My last dwarf, drafted and ordered into the fortress....refused to move...at all...I watched him sit there and burn to death when he could have easily survived(and I could have easily run the fortress long enough to get immigrants).  I wouldn't have been able to bury anyone that early on, I'd literally just started that fortress.  Regardless, it was a moot point because it was the last dwarf.  His death meant the annihilation of the expedition party.

Nerserus:
Well my magma forge project ( The world i was playing was modded. Giant magma cave spiders = Ownage, and an everyday threat if you don't kill them quickly. ) I got myself a "protector" ( A heavily armed Dwarven Hammerdwarf) gave him a *Keen Thunder Hammer* ( Basically a two handed warhammer made out of a material harder than steel. ) and a set of armor.

I got my two miners to dig out a channel, make a grate of keen, a door to be kept forbidden after we made the channels to permanently ensure 100% safety of the men. All looked like it was going smoothly, until i had a MASSIVE amount of retardation from my dwarves: The legendary miner at the LAST SECOND went into the down staircase ( For no appearent reason oddly ) and got burned by the magma the moment the other miner finished digging the final channel.

The surviving miner trapped himself on an "island" surrounded by magma, with no way out, and fire imps getting pretty annoyed with the tresspassers, i relied on my protector to save the day...First he had a drink...Then he had something to eat...Then he was coming...Then he went on his break...

Long story short. That day many dwarves felt the wrath of Dwarf Companion's "Hurt" feature. Sure made me feel better.

Sorcerer:
I had a legendary, but all too common mishap..

Orcs were invading, and my military were nowhere near good enough to face them yet, so i ordered the drawbridge closed
a dwarf ran forwards to pull the lever, and then promptly fell asleep right next to it.. He got torn to pieces by orcs, along with the rest of my fort

Untelligent:
I once found the corpse of my Dwarven Liason propped up against the bottom of my recently completed goblin execution tower. I came to the obvious conclusion that she had been standing on a bridge I was using as scaffolding as the mayor/mason removed it.

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