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[mattyb3]

Oh, lol.

1. Did Somebody Say Tentacle Demon?
2. Devon Knows How They Make Tentacle Demon So Creamy. (oh god)
3. Think Once, Think Twice, Think Tentacle Demon.
4. It's Shake 'n' Tentacle Demon, and I Helped.
5. Double the Pleasure, Double the Tentacle Demon. (someone has issues)
6. Probably The Best Tentacle Demon In The World.
7. Tentacle Demon Keeps Going and Going.
8. Cleans Your Floor Without Tentacle Demon.
9. Try Tentacle Demon, You'll Like It.
10. A Tentacle Demon's Too Wet Without One.

Yeah, i'm really disturbed now..

[AngryToad]

* You've got questions. We've got Dwarf.
* Do the Elf. ( )
* Plink, Plink, Noble... (Don't ask.)
* Every Dwarf Helps
* Have you had your Tentacle Demon today?
* Little. Yellow. Different. Fortress.
* You've always got time for Dwarf Fortress ()
* Your Fortress, right away.
* More than just a Cow.
* This is the age of the Kitten Tallow Roast.

[MrGimp]

Ive seen the future and it's booze-shaped!

[Zironic]

We bring magma to life.

[Zironic]

Get Serious. Get Magma

[Rashilul]

You're in good hands with Armok
Strong and beautiful, just like dwarves
Come see the softer side of armok
Half the magma, all the taste
what's in your *puppy meat roast*?
There's only one Armok
To our members, we're the fourth iron(ore)
Have you forgotten how good magma tastes?
It needn't be hell with tentacle demons

[Solifuge]

The incredible, edible Catsplosion.
What's in your Elf? (Lets see... 1 fat, 7 bones, 1 skull...)
Get the door, it's Bronze Colossus.
I'm only here for the Fun.
Run for the Sock.
All you add is Magma.
When the going gets tough, the tough get Adamantium.

[buman]

Get the door, it's Bronze Colossus.

I'm not falling for that again!

[Haven]

Only the crumbliest, flakiest dwarves.
The Dwarves of Confidence.
You can really taste the Dwarves! Try Dwarves, you'll like it!

[Kidiri]

You've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel Elf?' Well, do ya, punk?
I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Elves on fire off the shoulder of Orion.
No other factory in the world mixes its Elves by waterfall. But it's the only way if you want it just... right.
Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to Elves.
Soylent Green is Elves! - Wait, what?
It's a Sicilian message. It means Luca Brasi sleeps with the Elves.
I find your lack of Elf disturbing.
And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my Elf.
Oh, what sad times are these when passing ruffians can say 'Elf' at will to old ladies.
As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be an Elf. - Eeeeew...
I say we take off and nuke the entire Elf from orbit.
I see dead Elves. - You'd better!
That's no moon. It's an Elf.
An Elf. Shaken, not stirred.
Wait a minute, Doc. Are you telling me you built a time machine... out of an Elf? - Where did he put the flux capacitor?
Get your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty elf.
No, Mr. Bond, I expect elves to die.
Better to be king for a night than elf for a lifetime.
You're only supposed to blow the bloody elf off!
Father to a murdered son. Husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my elf, in this life or the next.
Elves? Where we're going we don't need elves.
The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world elves didn't exist.

That movie quote generator is damned addictive...

[Jackrabbit]

Good lord! You are suffering from
Adam West's Syndrome.

Cause: mosquito bite

Symptoms: steam whistling from ears, clicking sounds, tentacle growth, receding gums

Cure: exercise

And this was too perfect

Textbook example. You are suffering from
Dwarf Fortressosis.

Cause: bee sting

Symptoms: regurgitation, automatic writing, aggression, high blood-alcohol level

Cure: take four sprigs of belladonna every day for the rest of your life

[[P]sYDoNiA]

This stuff is modern art...

It's the Nobles fizz that does the bizz.
Dwarfs cannot burp - there is no gravity to separate liquid from gas in their stomach!
Get the nobles out.
Nothing sucks like a noble. (LOL! So darn perfect)
Nothin' says lovin' like nobles from the oven. (Even better!)
It takes 17 muscles to smile, and 43 to frown at logic.
Dorfs can pollinate up to six times more efficiently than the honeybee. (Proof of birth from spores!)
Dorfs have little need for water and are capable of going for months without drinking at all!
The liquid inside dwarf can be used as a substitute for blood plasma. ( )

Top ten trivia about Elves

[/size][/b]

(In no specific order)

1) Influenza got its name because people believed the disease was caused by the evil "influence" of elves.

2) A chimpanzee can learn to recognize itself in a mirror, but elves can not.

3) Lightning strikes elves over seven times every hour.

4) In the Spanish edition of Cluedo, elves are the victim.

5) Elves are the world's largest rodent.

6) Long ago, the people of Nicaragua believed that if they threw elves into a volcano it would stop erupting.

7) The most dangerous form of an elf is the bicycle.

Bananas don't grow on trees - they grow on elves.

9) The number one cause of blindness in the United States is elfs.

10) Research indicates that an elf will be attracted to people who have recently eaten bananas!



All hail the almighty randomisers.

[[P]sYDoNiA]

Ok... Wow I just saw somethin' so disturbing it merits a post on its own...

The biggest WTF ever...

The average duration of sexual intercourse for humans is two minutes.

It only tells the truth!

        

[Fault]

Got this from the "Bilateral thinking puzzles" on the same website.

I'm serious. It said this.
Q: Deep in the forest was found the body of a man who was wearing only swimming trunks, snorkel and facemask. The nearest lake was 8 miles away and the sea was 100 miles away. What happened?
A: The man is (of course) a dwarf.

and unlike most of the answers, IT MAKES SENSE....

[janglur]

1)  Bridge That Gap with Dwarf   (Sounds like a desperate solution to a woodless map)
2)  Snap into a slim dwarf          (The newest in trollvertising.)
3)  A dwarf works wonders         (Just as Urist.)
4)  You can really taste the dwarf!     (Famous first words of King Urist after their Macabre royal cook threw an unexpected banquet.)
5)  You'll never put a better bit of dwarf on your knife.    (After Toady adds Dwarven Butter.)
6)  Feel the Dwarf.   (Oh god, i'd really rather not.)
7)  Oh hungry?  Oh dwarf.   (Dragon McScaleybutt)
  With a name like Dwarf, it has to be good.
9)  I wish they could all be dwarf girls.                      (HUUUUUUUUUUURL)