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Author Topic: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?  (Read 28773 times)

Psyco Jelly

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What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« on: August 31, 2009, 12:15:43 am »

As we have no doubt seen, all children's programming fits into one of three categories:

1. Scary
2. Confusing
3. Biblical

Or any combination. Veggie tales managed to break a record by fitting all three, but I'm more concerned about shows that take one to the extreme.

I woke up at like 4 in the morning, and I started flipping through channels. I came across a bunch of multicolor blobs with zigzaggy lines bumbling around speaking gibberish, with a sudden and unexplained burst into song. The song was some lame rap, with random gibberish infused in the lyrics, with a repetitive and numbing rhythm. (So it's like normal rap.)

I went through about 15 minutes of eye-scorchingly colorful shapes and epilepsy, before I began to understand what the strange little beings were saying.

Spoiler: Rant (click to show/hide)



What the hell kind of show is this?
« Last Edit: August 31, 2009, 12:22:17 am by Psyco Jelly »
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Not only is it not actually advertising anything, it's just copy/pasting word salads about gold, runescape, oil, yuan, and handbags.  It's like a transporter accident combined all the spambots into one shambling mass of online sales.

Vester

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #1 on: August 31, 2009, 12:19:38 am »

Biblical?

I can't think of any Biblical cartoons.

(the first two categories are definitely true, though.)
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"Land of song," said the warrior bard, "though all the world betray thee - one sword at least thy rights shall guard; one faithful harp shall praise thee."

Psyco Jelly

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #2 on: August 31, 2009, 12:21:48 am »

Biblical?

I can't think of any Biblical cartoons.

(the first two categories are definitely true, though.)

When I was a Christian at about 10, the church had all sorts of cartoons that were admittedly well drawn and presented. Then they found veggietales. I think that's what drove me away from Christianity.
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Not only is it not actually advertising anything, it's just copy/pasting word salads about gold, runescape, oil, yuan, and handbags.  It's like a transporter accident combined all the spambots into one shambling mass of online sales.

Jack_Bread

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #3 on: August 31, 2009, 12:22:45 am »

What cartoon did you watch? Do you remember?
If you don't, do you at least know what station it was?

Sensei

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #4 on: August 31, 2009, 12:26:14 am »

It's definitely true. Cartoon Network for one, has been obviously decaying since 2004 or so, and redoubled their efforts in 2007 or 8. There is a legitimate change towards less intellectual (even for friggin' children!) programming.
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Cthulhu

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #5 on: August 31, 2009, 12:32:30 am »

The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack is a terrifying bastion of true entertainment in a sea of mind-numbing animated gruel.
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Vester

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #6 on: August 31, 2009, 12:34:09 am »

The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack is a terrifying bastion of true entertainment in a sea of mind-numbing animated gruel.

It actually reminds me a bit of Spongebob, only taken up to 11. Mind you I haven't watched it very much, so I'm basing this on the ads.
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"Land of song," said the warrior bard, "though all the world betray thee - one sword at least thy rights shall guard; one faithful harp shall praise thee."

Cthulhu

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #7 on: August 31, 2009, 12:35:56 am »

Spongebob has placed itself firmly in the animated gruel camp as of late.  Flapjack is more of a throwback to Ren and Stimpy, with extreme close ups and disturbing imagery.

Oh, and just the most delicious hint of steampunk.
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Phantom

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #8 on: August 31, 2009, 12:38:56 am »

They are all just plain strange/stupid, though Tom & Jerry was violent, it made a little more sense, Flapjack equals to WTF on the strange/stupid level.
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Neonivek

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #9 on: August 31, 2009, 12:39:08 am »

I've only seen ONE show that counted as Biblical... but all it actually did was draw from a bunch of stories, including ones in the Old Testiment, to teach kids lessons.

This is excluding non-english shows I seen... There is this FREEKISH one about some kids who occasionally speak to Jesus. (And the kids are kinda freekish)

I watch Cartoons a lot... So Confusing I don't know about... Scary is a yes though (Flapjack contains a lot of freeky moments)
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Rashilul

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #10 on: August 31, 2009, 12:42:47 am »

I woke up at like 4 in the morning, and I started flipping through channels. I came across a bunch of multicolor blobs with zigzaggy lines bumbling around speaking gibberish, with a sudden and unexplained burst into song. The song was some lame rap, with random gibberish infused in the lyrics, with a repetitive and numbing rhythm. (So it's like normal rap.)

I went through about 15 minutes of eye-scorchingly colorful shapes and epilepsy, before I began to understand what the strange little beings were saying.

Spoiler: Rant (click to show/hide)



What the hell kind of show is this?

Sounds like chowder.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Vester

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #11 on: August 31, 2009, 12:45:06 am »

I woke up at like 4 in the morning, and I started flipping through channels. I came across a bunch of multicolor blobs with zigzaggy lines bumbling around speaking gibberish, with a sudden and unexplained burst into song. The song was some lame rap, with random gibberish infused in the lyrics, with a repetitive and numbing rhythm. (So it's like normal rap.)

I went through about 15 minutes of eye-scorchingly colorful shapes and epilepsy, before I began to understand what the strange little beings were saying.

Spoiler: Rant (click to show/hide)



What the hell kind of show is this?

Sounds like chowder.

Yeah, chowder is odd.

It's got good voice acting, though.
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Quote
"Land of song," said the warrior bard, "though all the world betray thee - one sword at least thy rights shall guard; one faithful harp shall praise thee."

Phantom

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #12 on: August 31, 2009, 12:48:16 am »

How did they get from this
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
To this?!
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Psyco Jelly

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #13 on: August 31, 2009, 12:51:57 am »

IT was chowder.

It's hard to believe that Schnitzel is voiced by John DiMaggio, the same guy who does Bender from Futurama, and the Scotsman from Samurai Jack.

How did they get from this
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
To this?!
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

It's probably a Great Old One or something.
Logged
Not only is it not actually advertising anything, it's just copy/pasting word salads about gold, runescape, oil, yuan, and handbags.  It's like a transporter accident combined all the spambots into one shambling mass of online sales.

Vester

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Re: What's with Children's Cartoons Nowadays?
« Reply #14 on: August 31, 2009, 12:52:50 am »

How did they get from this
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
To this?!
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Changing tastes, phantom. It's that simple.

IT was chowder.

It's hard to believe that Schnitzel is voiced by John DiMaggio, the same guy who does Bender from Futurama, and the Scotsman from Samurai Jack.

The general quality of the production is sound - it's the visuals that shatter minds.
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Quote
"Land of song," said the warrior bard, "though all the world betray thee - one sword at least thy rights shall guard; one faithful harp shall praise thee."
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