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[Shook]

This is why you bring your smartphone to the loo, so you can browse while you do your business. :v

Last week I spent a solid 15 minutes curled in a ball on the floor as my intestines tore themselves free and went on tour of my body. I was damn close to tears on that one.

Still don't know why. It just sorta stopped after a while.

Jeez that sounds nasty. I'm not quite sure how i'd describe my rounds of badness, since there's really nothing else i've felt that's like it, but maybe somewhat like the discomfort you get when severe diarrhea has been kept in for too long and is EXTREMELY urgent. I'm too tired to write more now, and thankfully it seems to have passed, so i shall hopefully be off to bed very very soon.

Edit: Welp, 7:30am and still no actual sleep. Today's gonna suck. >.>

[Yoink]

This is why you bring your smartphone to the loo, so you can browse while you do your business. :v

I take a book. Or multiple books, if I can't decide on what to read.
Hell, these days I do most of my reading on the can, since I have so many more distractions to keep me from reading normally.
I also have a heap of digestive issues, but whether my reading habits are the cause of those issues or my lengthy toilet trips are the cause of reading habits is basically a "chicken or the egg" argument at this point. To keep this on topic: my butt makes me Sad.   

[hector13]

Be wary of sitting on the toilet too long without actually doing anything. That way haemorrhoids lie.

[Shook]

Already there, i'm afraid. :v
Anyhoo, i managed to get a few hours of very confusing sleep, which didn't really help that much, but at least i have slept a little. And guess what? No vomiting, no diarrhea, no nothing, only discomfort without a known cause. Fuck this day.

[Arx]

At least three dead, twenty wounded in multiple suicide bombings in Nigeria.

Just your regular reminder that Boko Haram is a more deadly terrorist organisation than ISIS.

[WillowLuman]

I may as well say my piece. For the last few days I've been painfully, overwhelmingly bored. I don't lack things to do, and if I did I could probably acquire more in short order. But I don't seem to want to do anything at all. I just flit about on the internet trying not to fall asleep.

It sounds like clinical depression. Such happens to me when unmedicated. If you have any games, I'd recommend picking one and just playing it, it can help you avoid falling into narcolepsy.

[scriver]

I recommend going for a walk for an hour or two.

[Felissan]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

My dad told me to try taking my antidepressants in the morning instead of the evening as a solution to my insomnia. Well, I prefer only sleeping 3 hours a night compared to constantly thinking about how I've messed everything up in the last few years of my life and feeling like all I can do is pointless. "I know what I'm doing, I'm a doctor" indeed.

[Neonivek]

Yeah my depression is getting particularly bad... I am starting to spontaneously cry and I am kind of desiring to shut down and shy away from everyone.

[misko27]

So I was in the Psych ward of the ER for 24 hours. Beyond all the other stuff that I could go on about (and boy could I go on about it for a while: the screaming alone is really something else, and I'm no newbie when it comes to listening to people scream at 2:30 in the morning), I just gotta say that it's really fucking boring in the Psych ward. Like mind-bogglingly boring. Bored to tears. I've never been so happy to see a newspaper in my entire life as I was when the depressed panhandler with withdrawal problems in the next room over offered me her copy. Not even a decent newspaper, only the Daily News, but at the time it felt like the most amazing literature I'd ever seen. I read that entire thing twice over; even the celebrity gossip section.

There's nothing to do there. They take everything, leave you in hospital scrubs or whatever and have you stare at a wall for hours on end. It's almost like a metaphor for depression: they take away everything that matters to you, and sit you in a grey cube, with nothing to do. You sleep until you get bored of sleeping. Periodically you try to explain your problems again to someone new, while hoping they'll either leave you alone or help, somehow. You're terrified of saying something that will trap you here. You have some vague hope that eventually this will all be worth it and maybe you'll get better, but you are also haunted by the thought that this was a terrible idea, that you're trapped, and you should escape at any cost.

Twenty-four hours in an emergency room, followed by seven hours today doing an intake, all so I could get a single slip of paper with a phone-number to call to try and do another intake at a place that might actually provide something useful. It should say something when the highlight of my day was listening to a man describe his experience in Bellevue (yes, that Bellevue, it's right here in NYC) where he repeatedly assaulted sex offenders (short version: if a man says "I will assault sex offenders if you put them in my room", he's probably serious). And all of this could be instantly avoided if we had enough money for a private doctor, but alas the money is just not there.

Honestly I'm in no mood for spoilers, so quote if you want. Compared to being in the ER, this is a surplus of privacy and personal space.

[scriver]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

My dad told me to try taking my antidepressants in the morning instead of the evening as a solution to my insomnia. Well, I prefer only sleeping 3 hours a night compared to constantly thinking about how I've messed everything up in the last few years of my life and feeling like all I can do is pointless. "I know what I'm doing, I'm a doctor" indeed.

I'm not a doctor, but I don't think the time you take the medicine should affect xwhat kind of feelings you have that directly.

I can relate to what you say though, I had and have the same problems (depression and being unable to fall asleep due to thoughts but proper insomnia ) which has in the past  led to me staying up very late just to be so tired I fall asleep the second I go to bed. For me (I've always taken my medicine in the morning, so I guess I don't know if it would affect the thinking) What has worked best is taking melatonin in the evening. Other "fall-asleep" pills have also worked with the issue of getting me to fall asleep before the mind starts churning out angst but melatonin is the one that has felt best to me.

[Helgoland]

Some antidepressants do affect your sleep though - I once pretty much lost an entire semester to one of those. Taking your meds at some other point is worth a try, at least if your sleep patterns are a problem to you.

[Rolan7]

I usually leave Steam in friends-off mode on my main computer.  Just now, I activated it, and... Steam is showing me this morning's conversation as if my ex never responded.

1) That's horrible programming.  Seriously.
2) Things I was being subtle about, even to myself, appear much less subtle when I'm the only one talking.  Fuuuck.

It's fine, though.  Momentary lapse.  I know better than to... yeah.

1A) Maybe if I didn't give a shit, I'd get a lot more done and be a professional again.

[Spehss _]

too tired mentally and physically from work (and helping family with family issues) to feel like doing anything meaningful tonight. waste of a night.

there's so much shit i need to fix in my life but i just don't have the time or energy or motivation to do any of it. for example, i'm sure if i exercised more like starting to go to the gym or just jogging regularly then that would probably help my lack of energy issue. and from there it would get easier to fix other shit. i just need to start getting fit. just need to start. but i don't start. apply that to everything else wrong with my life. "i just need to start fixing this" but i don't.

[Shook]

Greetings, i suffer from a very similar issue, i can relate. Be it laziness, anxiety or mere forgetfulness, there are a LOT of things i should be getting going with, but... Yeah. It's crippling, not gonna lie. My therapist once gave us the "you either do or don't, there is no 'try'" deal which i'm pretty sure i've heard elsewhere too, and quite frankly i don't entirely agree with it (if you fail to lift a mountain in spite of significant effort, have you not tried?), but in a sense, he's still right. It just takes a shit ton more willpower to do than to don't, and even then, the "do" might not succeed.

...

But we have to "do", don't we? Especially myself, i REALLY have to start doing. I'm approaching my first quarter century of living, having accomplished next to nothing, and while i'm still young, youth is running, and i'm not even jogging. Getting old without having accomplished anything is a scary goddamn thought, and it's one that risks becoming real if i don't get my shit together. It's just so fucking hard having to fight my own subconscious so much.