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[TD1]

Channel the drunkenness into a better tomorrow.

[JoshuaFH]

Why does it seem like the goal of every day of my life is "Desperately fight depression and unhappiness"? Not "Find happiness", but "Avoid misery".

The way it's framed, it very much seems in my own mind that finding what I want in life is impossible, that the best I can do is to be content and not depressed.

I've actually been exercising and dieting hardcore for a while now, and I lost 40 pounds, and I'm getting slimmer and slightly better looking, but when people ask me "So what's your end goal?" I have to avoid getting angry because I DON'T FUCKING KNOW DON'T ASK ME! DON'T MAKE ME THINK ABOUT IT YOU SONUVABITCH! ...

...

I'd like some real impetus towards exercising, because "To get in shape" or "to stave off depression" are really nebulous and counterintuitive goals with no end point. Even "To become more attractive to the opposite sex" feels like a stupid goal to have, because deep down I know it's impossible. Not because I don't think anyone can care about me, but I doubt I can ever look at anyone as a potential partner, only as a potential threat to my contentedness. No matter how hard I try, I can never stop thinking of myself as that drop of oil; it's the analogy that has stuck to me for years now.

I really wish there was just a competition or rivalry I could brainlessly throw myself into, to exert myself and improve myself with a definite and achievable goal. It feels preposterously rare though, it feels like everyone around me strives towards mediocrity and being average, and so there's no celebration or culture of high effort achievement. Maybe it's just me.

I have to get this off my chest, because I've been very lazy the last couple days, just thinking about going to the gym but being easily dissuaded by short-term highs, and feeling very intense anxiety about the outside world for some reason.

I need to get to sleep now.

[Hanslanda]

Join the army, start hating the Enemy. Strive for their destruction and to hear the lamentation of their women.

[JoshuaFH]

Thanks but no thanks Hans. I can't bear the thought of harming people. Unfortunately, I'm not a gullible enough sack to believe I was 'born to do something' but if I was, it wasn't to harm another person.

In other sad, I'm just having one of those days where I can't get to sleep. I've taken a ton of sleeping meds, but when I try to just close my eyes and get to sleep, it seems my mind and body aren't having none of that shit.

[CABL]

I've got some sickness yesterday. I felt some really nasty feeling of heaviness in my stomach, so I had to make myself vomit to get rid of this. Right now, I have high temperature (37.5 Celsius or 98,6 F for Americans here) and increased heartbeat. Thanks to Armok that I don't have problems with my throat.

[TheBiggerFish]

98.6 F is...normal though?  I don't think you converted right.

Anyway...
I have a nebulous feeling of blech.

[CABL]

Yeah, Google converter confused something a little. It's actually 99,5 F. Still, 37,5 Celsius is above normal (in my country, at least).

Oh, and I hate when I'm covered in sweat.

[Hanslanda]

I slept exactly one and one half hours last night, and drove for about nine hours

[scourge728]

Yeah, Google converter confused something a little. It's actually 99,5 F. Still, 37,5 Celsius is above normal (in my country, at least).

The fact that you were using commas instead of decimal points

[Rolan7]

That's just a European thing.  Drives me crazy too, but it's not *wrong*

[Descan]

I don't think he was making a joke; google conversion might have been confused by the comma instead of decimal. Tho TBH I'd expect better from Google than that.

[scourge728]

I wasn't making a joke, the fact that they were using commas was driving me crazy

[pisskop]

Why would it?

they use periods for commas in large numbers too.


I got my tax return in april, and I recieved 2.600 muniebucks back.

[Rolan7]

It's oddly obscure here in the states, even for Euro-stuff.  I only know because I worked with bicycles through middle-high school.  (Lot of French stuff, some German)
I don't think it ever came up in old Dr Who, or even Masterpiece Theatre.  Or other PBS shows.

Or uh, things seen by most people.

It literally makes me cringe (hush, Putnam) but it's just how they do.

[GiglameshDespair]

In the UK I've only ever seen . used for decimals and , for large numbers.