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[Mech#4]

I find dealing with people who have low self-esteem extremely difficult, because... I've never had that. It's easy for me to say that self-worth is a choice because I've always felt that I've chosen to have a high sense of self-worth.

I have moments of rather low self-esteem, usually of the kind that I fear people put up with me rather then enjoying my company. It's a tricky thing because there's no real way of confirming this for yes or no. To my advantage, I've spent a year in Scouts in Showtime (A big theatrical performance) where I managed to walk away with two awards (they're simple pieces of thick paper with stickers on but I've got them framed) and during university I've come to quite enjoy doing presentation in front of the class as my tactic is to learn what I'm talking about but have no written script to read off leaving a lot of room for improvisation.

Bit of a segway there, but my point is while I still have moments of low self-esteem I think well... either I sit here being self-conscious and not having any fun or act cheerful and crack (bad) jokes since no ones complained yet!

Acting and presenting in front of an audience has helped me quite a lot, I can look at that and see "Pff, the audience is as bored as I usually am whenever I see power-point presentations. I'm going to try and make this more interesting for them by doing something different."

[FearfulJesuit]

I'm drunk. I'm coming off of it, but...
...I hand infatuation out like candy.

[JoshuaFH]

Guess I'm back to the sad thread:

Man I just don't know what's up with Deli Girl. I was super ecstatic when I got her number, and when we talked it was her to come out and say that she was available and maybe we could hang out on the weekend. But now the weekend is here and... it's impossible to get a hold of her. I mean, I'll put off one day, she said that she had a migraine and didn't feel like doing anything. I'll chalk that up to coincidence and give the benefit of the doubt, even if my gut is panicking and thinking it's an excuse to get out of seeing me.

So I just put off Saturday, cause pushing things back to Sunday is alright. I text her once in the afternoon, just a short one asking how she's doing, and I wait patiently and... now nothing all day. What the hell is up? The feeling of being ignored by women is all too familiar and painful, and it's freaking me out no matter how hard I try to preoccupy myself to keep myself cool.

It's feeling like I'm running a race, and just about to hit the finish line when I run face first into an invisible forcefield. I don't know what it's made of, or where it comes from, or how to get through or around it, but it's there and it's stopping me from making progress.

I'm just not sure what to do here. I wasted my whole weekend looking forward to this, I could've gone to my cousin's arm wrestling competition in Kalamazoo, but I passed that up just for this chance. Now I'm just feeling like a moron without a clue how to proceed. Did my luck run out already?

[GrizzlyAdamz]

May this be a lesson: next time go to Kalamazoo.

[Jopax]

Or she might be using pre-paid cards (or whatever) they're called and simply ran out of credit to text you back. Just relax man, there's countless reasons as to why she's not answering, don't have to jump to some of the worst ones immedately

[MetalSlimeHunt]

My face. Is covered. In razor burn. Ow.

[JoshuaFH]

Or she might be using pre-paid cards (or whatever) they're called and simply ran out of credit to text you back. Just relax man, there's countless reasons as to why she's not answering, don't have to jump to some of the worst ones immedately

I mean, yeah, I guess. I suppose what I'm freaking out about is that we work different shifts. She works morning and I work afternoon, so it's the weekend where I was hoping we'd both have free time to just meet up and get to know eachother a little bit. If that window of opportunity is squandered and I'm left in the dark, I'm just not sure what to do or what to feel. It feels like I have to take action, I have to do something, but everything I think of feels like the wrong choice.

It fucking kills me, it eats me up on the inside that I need to be so nonchalant and aloof, while also needing to be the aggressor in trying to actually start something. I don't want my actions to imply that I'm begging for her attention; that pisses me off, that makes me feel distressed and weak, but I'm just not sure what to do here. and I still don't want the rest of this day to go wasted.

Is it ok to question if she's still interested?

[MagmaMcFry]

My face. Is covered. In razor burn. Ow.

Wait what? Did you burn your beard off with a flaming razor?

[Descan]

Isn't that how you do it?

[LordSlowpoke]

Isn't that how you do it?

You're supposed to burn the beard and use a supercooled razor to take down whatever the fire didn't remove. Bloody amateurs.

[MagmaMcFry]

I always use a laser-guided orbital cheese grater. Takes the follicles off too, so I don't have to shave so often (although due to a miscalibration incident I'm currently waiting for my lower jaw to regrow).

[Jopax]

Or she might be using pre-paid cards (or whatever) they're called and simply ran out of credit to text you back. Just relax man, there's countless reasons as to why she's not answering, don't have to jump to some of the worst ones immedately

I mean, yeah, I guess. I suppose what I'm freaking out about is that we work different shifts. She works morning and I work afternoon, so it's the weekend where I was hoping we'd both have free time to just meet up and get to know eachother a little bit. If that window of opportunity is squandered and I'm left in the dark, I'm just not sure what to do or what to feel. It feels like I have to take action, I have to do something, but everything I think of feels like the wrong choice.

It fucking kills me, it eats me up on the inside that I need to be so nonchalant and aloof, while also needing to be the aggressor in trying to actually start something. I don't want my actions to imply that I'm begging for her attention; that pisses me off, that makes me feel distressed and weak, but I'm just not sure what to do here. and I still don't want the rest of this day to go wasted.

Is it ok to question if she's still interested?

Honestly I'm not the best person to ask since most of my expirience with girls is either friendships or horrible awkward friendzoning.

But, if I was forced to answer at gunpoint for some reason I'd say wait for the weekend to end to see if she answers, if not, let her know that you're sorry she wasn't able to get back to you but that you'd love to try and get together next weekend (if that is what you want) or sooner if possible.

I think that'd be enough to give off that you're still interested but aren't really desperate or anything of the sort.

Anyways, cheer up man, 'tis just a girl, while it might seem like a big deal you have plenty of life ahead of you, there'll be plenty of chances to screw stuff up by misunderstanding other people

[Vector]

No, wait and let her get back to you.  Another guess--the honest, trusting guess--would be that if she's got a migraine then she may not be up to communicating.  Wait a little while.  If she says nothing for a while longer, then send another message checking up on her; and after that, the shoe's on her foot.

You don't need to be "the aggressor."  This is a dance, not a fight.

[Mr Space Cat]

Weekend's over. I achieved shit.

Spoiler: venting rant (click to show/hide)

Everything is terrible. No matter what I do I cannot live up to my disgustingly high expectations for myself, no matter what I tell myself, or what goals I set for myself, everything I try becomes fruitless endeavours or wastes of time that I already don't have. Goddamn it, this weekend I wasted time over tabletop games, not even playing them, but reading stories about crap people did in them and enjoyed themselves doing and learning how much cash and time I'd have to invest on average to fool myself into feeling like I'm doing something by playing DnD or some crap.

I thought I had done pretty good this weekend, I felt pretty good about myself, I felt at peace, now it's 11:00 at night and looking back at what I did in my precious time away from high school, the peace is crashing down. I did complete shit. It's all terrible, my guitar skills are terrible, I know next to nothing on writing music or recording or composing or any of that, and games are wastes of time and virtual achievement that make me feel good until I look back and think "wow that was a waste." I could just as easily have lain in bed all weekend and imagine rubbish instead.

I have no time to do enough and even now I'm wasting more time that could be spent fruitlessly practicing guitar instead typing this stupid post whining over stupid me and my stupid everything. No matter what I do or try I waste time and everything I do cannot meet my expectations and is therefore terrible. There's not enough time in the day for me to feel I did enough.

Too much to do, so much to see, I guess.

I thought I was doing so well yet apparently not. Everything's pointless and sucks, now disregard this post.

[GrizzlyAdamz]

If she says nothing for a while longer, then send another message checking up on her; and after that, the shoe's on her foot.

You don't need to be "the aggressor."  This is a dance, not a fight.

Pretty much what this guy said. If'n you're concerned, send her your regards and hope she feels better. Otherwise, just forget about it- take a deep breath and think about what you'd be doing if you hadn't worked yourself up over it, then do that. Either she'll call or she won't, isn't the end of the world if she doesn't and another trick: if you set a line for yourself (don't message beyond the 'are you okay') then you don't have to worry about it anymore- once you reach that line it's out of your control.