I have that problem too - people expect all sorts of... emotions out of my when relatives die. Even close ones. But even then, I may grieve queitly to myself, for a while, if I was close... but I don't understand these American funerals. Wakes. Mementos.
I don't understand why I would want to dwell on it, and what purpose it would serve to focus on the fact that they are no longer there. Is that not the exact opposite of the kind of memories I would want, if ?
They are gone. Things go. That's how life is. Especially in situations like this, when they were never really there to begin with, I don't understand why people think I should be acting the way they expect.
Like, maybe if I was the mother, I could understand the issue there, but... ugh, I dunno.