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Author Topic: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever  (Read 11471 times)

Telcontar

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Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« on: October 29, 2009, 04:08:41 pm »

I received a notification recently that a kidnapper had made off with one of the children of my fortress - a baby actually. I was sad, but only because I thought I'd had the security part of my fortress pretty much on lock and apparently I was wrong. One less baby certainly ain't a big deal.

Then it stuck me that, as the victim was a baby, the goblin must have stolen it right out of the arms of its mother! Crazy!

But it gets worse. I tracked down the mother - and it was one of the speardwarves I had guarding the front door. Some goblin thief snuck up on my guards and snatched the kid out of the arms of its military mother whose sole purpose was keeping an eye out for goblins.

I took her out of the military, as that life certainly didn't seem to suit her. She will be tending the fields for the rest of her natural life.
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Vlynndar

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #1 on: October 29, 2009, 04:10:40 pm »

Whoa. That is one stealthy goblin.

I wouldn't be surprised that if harvest came around, the plump helmets would mysteriously disappear just as she's bending down to pick them.
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For that viciously bad pun, I'm gonna introduce a NPC named Vlynndar just so that I can kill him of in a cruel and unusual way.
Watermelons are pretty important.

Heliman

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #2 on: October 29, 2009, 04:13:21 pm »

Note: try not to put anything less than champions on the outer reaches of your fort unless you can help it, the champion's legendary status lets them have super states enabling them to chase the little green bastards down easier.
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They Got Leader

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #3 on: October 29, 2009, 05:34:18 pm »

I think that that dwarf is actually a goblin in disguise! They are getting smarter...

We need the million dwarfbuck dwarf!
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Telcontar

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #4 on: October 29, 2009, 09:24:27 pm »

Too new of a fort for that, Heliman. My dwarves also have slow-learner to up the challenge as well.
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Jude

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #5 on: October 29, 2009, 09:57:17 pm »

I bet a goblin could wait till a dwarf is distracted by a legendary dining room and snatch the dwarf's entire family out from under her beard.
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h3lblad3

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #6 on: October 29, 2009, 10:58:03 pm »

Too new of a fort for that, Heliman. My dwarves also have slow-learner to up the challenge as well.
As if they aren't stupid enough without your help?
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LeoLeonardoIII

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #7 on: October 30, 2009, 06:11:36 pm »

With [SLOW_LEARNER], dwarves probably don't sit around and talk anymore. They just stand in the same corner altogether, staring at each other, sticking their bearded lips out trying to make sounds. And giggling when someone actually says a whole word.
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Stargrasper

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #8 on: October 30, 2009, 07:40:44 pm »

I received a notification recently that a kidnapper had made off with one of the children of my fortress - a baby actually. I was sad, but only because I thought I'd had the security part of my fortress pretty much on lock and apparently I was wrong. One less baby certainly ain't a big deal.

Then it stuck me that, as the victim was a baby, the goblin must have stolen it right out of the arms of its mother! Crazy!

But it gets worse. I tracked down the mother - and it was one of the speardwarves I had guarding the front door. Some goblin thief snuck up on my guards and snatched the kid out of the arms of its military mother whose sole purpose was keeping an eye out for goblins.

I took her out of the military, as that life certainly didn't seem to suit her. She will be tending the fields for the rest of her natural life.

You see? That, right there, is precisely why I keep wardogs at my front gate.  They may not be terribly strong, but never once have they failed to detect an enemy which the local miner or woodcutter could promptly slaughter all before I have a chance to deploy a military unit.
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Count Dorku

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #9 on: October 30, 2009, 08:41:01 pm »

We now have to worry about goblin ninjas. Let me know when the zombie troll pirates turn up.
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"when in doubt, Magma"

Miners are diggin out nicely, everything will go right, i hope. hell, what am i even saying? this is dwarf fortress. it wont go right.

SquirrelWizard

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #10 on: October 30, 2009, 08:46:19 pm »

heh that reminded me of a snatcher incident in ToolCrews.

Snatcher! Protect the Children.

A goblin bagged a child right in the midst of 8 of my champion marksdwarves (I had 16 in total, and was rotating them out)

I wonder what must have gone through that goblin's heads. Likely a couple +cat bone bolt+s
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Heliman

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #11 on: November 01, 2009, 09:08:54 pm »

Too new of a fort for that, Heliman. My dwarves also have slow-learner to up the challenge as well.
Jesus, no wonder the gobbo got away. also when running a fort like that get the dwarves training up their wrestling first because of how easy it is to skill-up and avoid injuries from the near permanently dabbling recruits.
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Count Dorku

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #12 on: November 13, 2009, 04:23:31 pm »

I had a sneaky kobold in my last Dig Deeper fort...nicked the ammunition out of an Orc bowman's quiver!
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"when in doubt, Magma"

Miners are diggin out nicely, everything will go right, i hope. hell, what am i even saying? this is dwarf fortress. it wont go right.

shadowclasper

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #13 on: November 13, 2009, 04:28:00 pm »

Hunting dogs. Seriously. They'll detect just about anything that isn't legendary ambusher skills equivalent, at least in my experience.
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Blargityblarg

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Re: Sneakiest Gobbo Ever
« Reply #14 on: November 13, 2009, 06:17:16 pm »

I had a bunch of raccoons steal an entire ambush of Shade Elves' (Assorted Silliness Mod) ammo.

All of it.
And the elves still weren't visible =D
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