Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

Because I set the closing date too soon

0 (0%)

Because it was lame.

0 (0%)

Because everyone hated it.

0 (0%)

Because nobody used it.

0 (0%)

Total Members Voted: 0

Voting closed: November 30, 2009, 12:43:18 am

[Taco Dan]

yay for elfyness.

tip: if you want to buy most of the basic crap first (backpack) then if you've got the patience keep picking up soil and then sell it. after about 5 minutes of this you should be able to buy a backpack

It looks like I have to spawn a new world though, seeing as the one elf civ I could start out in was wiped out over the course of me playing.
I only wish it was because of me...

[Taco Dan]

When we last left off, we had just become a dirty cheater.
This time, no DFCompanion!


It's time for the epic adventures of Elf McHugger the Thief!

I set off to find the nearest human town.
Unfortunately it's horribly maimed:

In fact that's the same for all the towns I've come across, half constructed houses with black sand all around. There's no people, no corpses, nothing.

Finally, I come to a human town that WASN'T attacked by a horde of sand golems.

[skaltum]

yay lets go buy and steal.


as for now. i'm off to bed

[Taco Dan]

I sneak in at night, nobody sees me until...
A guard somehow notices me (even though I wasn't stealing at the time) and stabs me with a trident, it lodges in the wound and I have no idea how to pull it out, so i run around chucking stolen meat at him.

See all those fish shaped things? That's all meat.
Then I die.

So I decide to come back as a Uman and steal the hell out of my own civ.
I succeed and go to a forest retreat to recruit some... well... recruits.
I'm in... luck? The elves are at war with the neighboring human civ... That I came from... And they didn't attack when they saw me coming... smartest... elves... ever...
Their Druid tells me to kill one of the humans, easy enough, so I go off to enlist the help of some marksmen.
I'm only able to recruit a swordsman, and I was hoping to find the person in question without drawing attention, but my companion immediately pounces on the nearest farmer and starts stabbing him repeatedly!

Uman the Thief: "Okay we're in the town, now let's not draw attention to ou-"
Elfy McSpazz: "AAAAAARRRGGHH!"
Uman the Thief: "No! No! Bad elf! Get off him!"
*squelch* *squelch*
Uman the Thief: "Now look what you've done! You've made a mess all over the place! Who's going to clean that up?"
Elfy McSpazz: "NOM NOM NOM"

Unfortunately he gets in a fight with a guard and gets his ass handed to him, so I leave.

[skaltum]

Uman the Thief: "Okay we're in the town, now let's not draw attention to ou-"
Elfy McSpazz: "AAAAAARRRGGHH!"
Uman the Thief: "No! No! Bad elf! Get off him!"
*squelch* *squelch*
Uman the Thief: "Now look what you've done! You've made a mess all over the place! Who's going to clean that up?"
Elfy McSpazz: "NOM NOM NOM"

Unfortunately he gets in a fight with a guard and gets his ass handed to him, so I leave.

LOL. go kill a dwarf and a gobbo. that way only the elves will give you respect

oh and. SIGGED 

[Metal Militia]

lol this seems to be going like every other adventure I've had while trying to do it properly

[skaltum]

i've got something even better for you to try!


play adventure mode in 2D!!!

it's so much better and more complete than the 3D version

such as

• ruins and destroyed human ruins contain armies of zombies
• exploring an old fort will now be over run with monsters

MASSIVE SPOILER

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

if you get the too deep message in fort mode after breaching the final chasm behing the god metal (adamantine) then you can return as an adventurer and figt the demon realesed. succed and the adamantine will turn to silver!! how ace was that!

[Taco Dan]

i've got something even better for you to try!


play adventure mode in 2D!!!

it's so much better and more complete than the 3D version

such as

• ruins and destroyed human ruins contain armies of zombies
• exploring an old fort will now be over run with monsters

MASSIVE SPOILER

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

if you get the too deep message in fort mode after breaching the final chasm behing the god metal (adamantine) then you can return as an adventurer and figt the demon realesed. succed and the adamantine will turn to silver!! how ace was that!

I'll maybe do that in a while, I have some other things planned for right now.

[skaltum]

sounds funtm

[Taco Dan]

Nobody wants to talk to me...

Oh well, the elves still like me.

after about a half hour of searching I found the person I need to kill:

Have at you!

[Metal Militia]

KILL 'EM ALL

[skaltum]

GUT HIM/HER!

[Taco Dan]

A battle of epic proportions ensues!

Video of about a quarter in.
I kicked that guy's ASS!
Time to bring news of my success!

I seem to have leveled up from "Uman the Thief" to "Uman Quicklocks the Thief" as well.

[skaltum]

AWESOME!

time to throw some javelins (spears)

[Taco Dan]

News of my success has spread throughout elven lands.
Adventurers flock to join me, five swordsman and an axeman, oddly enough, the bowman still mock me...

Anyway it's time to take on a village!
Of course since I'm a pussy I stay back and watch because I really don't want to die.
And I stumble upon a... cannable?

Whatever, HAVE AT YOU!

Wow, that was quick...

We kill many humans until one elf is left, at which point shopkeepers come out with crossbows and kill both of us.

What surprises do I have in store next time? Find out in chapter 4-1: Surprise!