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Author Topic: Sigtext  (Read 431366 times)

Lagslayer

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #405 on: December 29, 2013, 12:14:46 am »

Quote from: Azureangelic
Quote from: Number4
WHAT. SYRUPSPRINKLE? CARNAL QUAKES? Not only is he going around bitchslapping forgotten beasts with his massive platinum compensator, he's named like a fucking pornstar as well. Probably he's killing a dragon right now , while munching on a dwarven syrup roast, drinking some sunshine from his glass vial and boning a dwarfette. While standing around 20 inches away from her.
Dear lord, he's like the Dwarven equivalent of Duke Nukem.

hello everyone, im posting here not because i have something sad to tell, but because i find it strange that despite there being a sad thread with 4.6k replies on the first page of this section. There is no such thread for happy things that happened? Why isnt there a thread called "Things that made you smile today?". I think this is sad...    oh wait lol hahaha

The happy thread is the thread with burritos in the title.
oh geez how could i have missed that? i thought it was some random touhou thread, hah

Regardless of what other people are saying about it being mere coincidence, I'm 100% certain that Angler Fishes used to be land dwelling creatures, a hideous race of fish people that used their bioluminescence to bring humanity to it's knees. It was the Neanderthals that sacrificed themselves in the long forgotten Fish V Cave Man war that drove them down into the depths of the oceans.

When Jewish Meth Grannies Attack
« Last Edit: April 16, 2014, 04:41:45 pm by Lagslayer »
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flame99

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #406 on: December 29, 2013, 04:34:08 am »

Are you suggesting we carve the skin off the next random peasant we meet and wear their skin and face?

I have some tips if you need em.
So I did a thing.
I grant you the title Great Hero of Heroic Greatness
(apparently that's something I can do)
Er...  Sorry, but there's nothing here, this was an accidental misposted-

Ah, screw it.

We should domesticate mankind. ((Or maybe i'm too ambitious, just popped op in my head))
We should marry mankind! Let's get married married married~
The story of Kolkeskal, the FB-slaying turkey.
Either something is wrong, or I may have suddenly discovered that the secret to fire magic is shea butter hand soap.
On the -fords from TWoOtA. See the wiki link in my post sig if you don't know what TWoOtA is.
How come sometimes when I think about Luna everything smells like gold and I taste screaming fanaticism and statues?
And so it was told. The greedy dwarves of Bay12 would have to wait three days. Three days, they would have to survive without knowledge of the true world. Three days... without the glorious presence of Lune... But on that final day they would receive a rant. A rant to end all rants! Thirty-five paragraphs of pure epic! And so the dwarves agreed, their greed overcoming sense...
I say this is the most loving, accepting, positive way possible: FUUUUCK YOOOOOOOU AND YOUR DAMN LUCK. :P
Well, this is certainly going into my sig.

I'm currently running 1 forum game:
The War of the Elements, a semi-fantasy TSG that I really have no idea what I'm doing with. I'd like to add some more, but I'm not sure what I could add. Go ahead and read if for yourself; it isn't terribly long, or at least at the time of writing.
« Last Edit: May 07, 2014, 09:26:51 pm by flameboy99 »
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Isn't that the problem with women? The second you marry one it's all "I want better weapons" and "Let me kill all things we come across".

Love you, Cinder <3

Rolepgeek

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #407 on: January 02, 2014, 05:37:21 pm »

My rampant narcissism means I have to claim a spot here for my personal glory.

And also quotes I've stolen from other people.

Roleplgeek, you're the best.
TWEET TWEET TWEET, BITCH
Damn illegal aliens! They are stealing our souls!
« Last Edit: January 02, 2016, 12:53:14 pm by Rolepgeek »
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Sincerely, Role P. Geek

Optimism is Painful.
Optimize anyway.

Playergamer

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #408 on: January 02, 2014, 05:49:51 pm »

Gotta say, I steal sigs all the time. Well, not all the time, but there's a couple in there I didn't find in the wild. Haters gonna hate.
Sigged  :P
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A troll, most likely...But I hate not feeding the animals. Let the games begin.
Ya fuckin' wanker.   

My sigtext

TalonisWolf

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #409 on: February 01, 2014, 10:36:12 pm »

Sobriety: A Dwarve's Tale of Misfortune

Quote from:
Crimsom Doom, during an debate within a thread on the Sufficient Velocity forums:
 ...this is the stupidest thing I've ever heard. You don't fight stupid misconceptions by spreading stupid misconceptions on the other side of the argument, you fight stupid misconceptions by using provable truth. If they won't listen to proof, they won't listen to anything.

Just to clarify its not one civ per player, rather everyone's working together.
It is not my fault if everyone else's suggestions are wrong.

10/10

I am Dunamisdeos of Llama. Your artifacts and liquor supplies will be added to our own. Resistance is futile.


I think blasting both hands off of somebody is firmly in the "less lethal" category, not "nonlethal". :P

Either way, it's a good way to disarm your opponent.

"Unhand me, knave!"






...so I'm Urist McUseless Craftsdwarf. Joy.

Elves:A Theory

Cast Time Reversal on GWG to pull him back to a point where he hasn't suffered any pain, 'healing' or wounds.

[5]

NO...NOOOOO...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I HATE YOU FOREVER.



TALONISWOLF RUINED EVERYTHING, STAB HIM IN THE PANCREAS



^...Opps.^
I didn't think it would work, I thought it would backfire spectacularly... but I'm not complaining.

((And thus began the great war of new zealand with sheep,cows,and shear ninjas with snow-making machines.))

Start threataning the sheep with the fact that they could be the next ingrediant for my world famous hamburgers.
SHEEP WILL CONSUME ALL OF THE HAMBURGERS
HAMBURGERS WILL CONSUME ALL OF THE SHEEP
BURN IN RIGHTEOUS FIRE, CRETIN! MY SHEEP SHALL REIGN SUPREME!!

YES,THEY SHALL REIGN SUPREME IN MY HAMBURGERS!!
YOUR HAMBURGURERS WILL BUUUUUUURRRRRNNNNN

I think we should stop now.

WITH YOUR SHEEP IN THEM!!!

Probably

*chugs beer and then slams it on the floor*

LET'S FUCKING DO IT!

And Captain Testosterone steps up to the plate. I'm sure his good friend Poor Judgement will be following soon after.

Joe attempts to synthesize health from testosterone.

WHICH GROWS ON SOIL, INBRED PEASANT!
THEN HOW COME WE DON'T SAY "GROW ON SOIL" FOR EVERYTHING, SINCE TREES ALSO GROW ON SOIL,  FECKLESS KNAVE?
BECAUSE THE ORIGINAL SAYING WAS A CONVENIENT IDIOM FOR THE RARITY OF AN OBJECT, SEEING AS THE TREES THAT PEOPLE WERE MOST FAMILIAR WITH GREW APPLES WHICH ARE QUITE COMMON, YOU UNEDUCATED SWINE!
ARE YOU INSINUATING THAT GRASS IS UNFAMILIER TO PEOPLE? I SHOULD NOT EVEN HAVE TO INSULT YOU IF YOU ARE INSINUATING THAT GRASS IS UNFAMILIER TO PEOPLE.
WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE, WE DIDN'T EVEN HAVE GRASS. WE HAD DIRT, AND THAT WAS IT. IT WAS OUR DINNER, OUR TOYBOX, OUR INTERNET, AND OUR ONLY FRIEND.

I'M NOT EVEN FAMILIER WITH THIS STUFF
I JUST WANTED TO SHOOT GWG IN THE FACE

Head: Deuterium Flouride Laser ("Head mounts reroll head location" haha no they don't)
I think it's meant to be "Main mounts reroll head location", because they're usually too big.
Screw the rules I have headcannon.

I'd like to file a complaint with our intel department.
Where would i find the proper forms?

The forms are probably inside a Howitzer. You'll have to climb in to get them, though.

...


If you can get salmon in animal traps, you should be able to eject them by putting those into minecarts, having the cart hit a wall, throwing the animal trap which hits another wall, which should throw the raw salmon.

Unfortunately, water doesn't slow down flying objects, so they'd probably hit the bottom of the catch pool and explode or something, but I'd still call that a success.


Sturgeon's law Lego, you forgot to factor in that.

Look it up, it's the idea that 90% of everything is crap, and the remaining 10% is any good.
[/quote]




Cats:Dwarf Fortress trying to show us something?

D1 through to D999 Dice Roller! (you type # in on bottom most die)

ASCII DRAW
http://amulware.net/advASCIIdraw/][URL]
« Last Edit: January 12, 2018, 01:25:52 am by TalonisWolf »
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TalonisWolf has claimed the title of Sig-forger the Burning Champion of Lime Green!
GENERATION 32:
The first time you see this, copy it i

Remuthra

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #410 on: February 01, 2014, 10:57:51 pm »





...so I'm Urist McUseless Craftsdwarf. Joy.
More like Urist McSiegeEngineer.
Or Urist McLegendaryMetalWorker.
See "Useless Craftsdwarf Professions".

Avis-Mergulus

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #411 on: February 04, 2014, 05:21:33 pm »

Oh, I guess I'll get one like the big boys.

GAMES:

Trailblazers in a World of Winter (hiatus)
Roll to destroy the GM
Into Empty Skies (It's dead, Jim.)

QUOTES:
Yo ass might wonder why I be so much mo' blingin than yo thugged-out ass. Of course I be mo' blingin ta me than yo ass is ta me; I don't give two shits bout yo thugged-out ass. That's tha ass of dis matter: tha issue here is what tha fuck you all do fo' me, not tha other way around. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka!


Yes, actually. Seriously, snorting bonecain is a major common sense violation.

Yes, you accidentally knocked over your shiv collection and will have to spend the day arranging it so somebody doesn't get shanked unintentionally *hint, hint*

On the other hand, if something is bad enough that you'll get your ass drilled into to cure, then I'd rather the ass-drill than for it to continue.
If someone is going to drill into my bones I want to be knocked out for the procedure and then so doped up with meds afterward that I don't remember my recovery period, and the doctor hands me a bill one day and says "Son, you don't even want to know." Gladly pay.

Making an all-purpose introduction thread for the forum is sort of like hanging a "WELCOME TO THE FORUM!" banner in one corner above a battered, fold-up plastic table with a few plates of stale cheese sandwiches and a bottle of flat soda, and then sitting nearby with a creepily welcoming grin, just waiting for someone to be lured in so we can greet them.

Anything can stop a moose in its tracks if you have enough of it traveling at a high enough velocity.

"Urist McRandomGuard has been happy lately. He admired a nice ass lately."

...Wait, what?

Plot twist: the wolves tested the ice axe on him.
In Soviet Russia, wolves ice axe you!
In Soviet Russia, ice wolves axe you!
In Soviet Russia, axe wolves ice you!
In Soviet Wolves, ice Russia you axe!
Axe Soviet in, ice you Russia wolves!
Wolves You Soviet, Ice Russia Axe In!
Ice wolves Russia, Soviet you in axe!


I call bacon nom sequitur, so my just as planned.

Well, I had a rather strange dream. It was that I was playing a game of D&D with friends, an oddity to begin with seeing as I have no fucking clue how the hell D&D works. Continuing on, for some reason, my character was named, of all things, "Jesus".

He was a grizzly bear.

Made out of solid beer.

He spent the whole of combat convincing enemies to walk into enclosed spaces.

Why? Because his sole ability was that, if someone enters an enclosed space, he could seal it perfectly and instantly perform a closed-room murder. In addition to that, when the clawed and mauled corpse is inevitably found, it would always, for some obscure reason, be naked and any autopsy or autopsy-equivalent performed upon it would indicate that the cause of death was AIDS. Throat clawed out? AIDS did it. Cleanly bisected? AIDS of course. Vivisected, gutted, mauled, perforated, torn to shreds and clawed for good measure? Without a doubt, the symptoms of AIDS.

Please tell me you'll be playing a talking anime fox~


How long could you survive after punching a bear in the balls?
<p>Created by Oatmeal</p>

This is why you don't have sexytimes with an iron golem.
Or magma Gollum. After his fall, of course.

Bemoan your fate through lungs stifled by the infecting Yeast! Bubble your last breath in foamy fountains of pain! Succumb to the Ghost Beer and be our sacrifice, lest it strikes again.


I guess you can call it Lemurilla's Thrilla Paper in Teaching How to Holla for a Dolla Dolla Bill, Y'all.

Spider crab, spider crab
Does whatever should never be done
What's it like?  We don't know
Cuz we're busy nuking from orbit

Heads up!
Here comes atomic purging!
« Last Edit: February 01, 2016, 03:21:33 am by Avis-Mergulus »
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“See this Payam!” cried the gods, “He deceives us! He cruelly abuses our lustful hearts!”

LeoLeonardoIII

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #412 on: February 04, 2014, 08:39:47 pm »

You pimped my screed!
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The Expedition Map
Basement Stuck
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Haunter of Birthday Cakes, Bearded Hamburger, Intensely Off-Topic

Avis-Mergulus

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #413 on: February 05, 2014, 02:37:57 am »

You pimped my screed!
So I did. Here's the full version:
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“See this Payam!” cried the gods, “He deceives us! He cruelly abuses our lustful hearts!”

Elephant Parade

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #414 on: February 05, 2014, 02:45:45 am »

You pimped my screed!
So I did. Here's the full version:
Gizoogle never ceases to be entertaining.
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Do not worry Comrade, your anime is safe with us, the people. Do not forget that we love capitalism and Donald Trump like you do, and also anime. Watch all the anime you want Comrade, because now it is free for the worker -w-working class. It is free for the working class. Comrade.

Steelmagic

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  • Insanity makes everything fun!
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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #415 on: February 05, 2014, 03:23:09 am »

You pimped my screed!
So I did. Here's the full version:
Gizoogle never ceases to be entertaining.
I've run Bay12 through gizoogle a few times, and it's just so funny to see everybody talking gangsta. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch.
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When i say "I'm no expert but..." It means "I have no idea what the hell I'm talking about but I'm going to try to sound like i do."

Avis-Mergulus

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #416 on: February 05, 2014, 03:49:06 am »

Derm's sig cracked me up especially hard.

Quote
I be a monument ta all of yo' sins.
If you peep me, it is too late.
Behold hommie! Da magnificent juice of tha grand sorceror!
Da manifest fear of ten thousand godz n' demons shall end yo' game.
Run.
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“See this Payam!” cried the gods, “He deceives us! He cruelly abuses our lustful hearts!”

Remuthra

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #417 on: February 05, 2014, 03:57:59 pm »

Derm's sig cracked me up especially hard.

Quote
I be a monument ta all of yo' sins.
If you peep me, it is too late.
Behold hommie! Da magnificent juice of tha grand sorceror!
Da manifest fear of ten thousand godz n' demons shall end yo' game.
Run.
Gravemind?

kisame12794

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #418 on: February 05, 2014, 04:30:13 pm »

Nah. It's just the stuff in Derms sig.
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The non-assholes vastly outnumber the assholes but the assholes can fart with greater volume.
((You're an arm and a torso in low orbit. This was the best possible resolution of things.))

Octobomb

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Re: Sigtext
« Reply #419 on: February 05, 2014, 04:49:15 pm »

Nah. It's just the stuff in Derms sig.
No, it is the gravemind. Also Cortana.
This is UNSC A.I. Serial Number CTN0452-9. I am a monument to all your sins.
Awesome.
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I saw 5 people with fedoras in my town yesterday.
They're the special biohazard containment agent, out to deal with m'laria.
Sig
Bay12's resident tea drinkers
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