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Author Topic: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.  (Read 10953 times)

Funk

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Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« on: April 13, 2010, 11:38:13 am »

do you want to swim in magma?
Snicker as elf dir form acid rain?
And lose weight fast?

sounds to good to be true, but burning useing trees and this 5 step guide you can.

step 1
sit fire to tree

step 2
stand be the tree till your fat starts to melt

step 3
move away from the tree wait to stop melting and bleeding

step 4
check to see if the fat is gone if not go back to step 2.
if most be listed as body part has no fat.

step 5
move site and repeat steps 1-4 till you have no body fat left.

The Science bit most of the the time things don't die by burning but blood loss from melting fat, so no fat to melt so no blood loss.

Cerion

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #1 on: April 13, 2010, 11:56:00 am »

This has to be one of the most ridiculous exploits I've ever heard of in a computer game, congratulations
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kuribo

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #2 on: April 13, 2010, 12:47:46 pm »

Haha, I just tried this.

Now, it says: "Her upper body is melted. Her head's fat is gone." I know it's just her hair color, but: "Her hair is charcoal."  ;D

I'm so glad to be rid of that annoying head fat.

Also, if you walk around while you're melting, you leave horrific trails of blood everywhere.
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I OFTEN BURN WHITE HOT AND DRIFT LAZILY ACROSS THE STRATOSPHERE EMITTING PIERCING SCREAMS JUST LIKE THE REAL SUN

Duke 2.0

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #3 on: April 13, 2010, 12:49:17 pm »

 Dwarf Fortress: Become a god by horribly mutilating yourself in fire.

 For some reason this makes me think of Silent Hill.
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Buck up friendo, we're all on the level here.
I would bet money Andrew has edited things retroactively, except I can't prove anything because it was edited retroactively.
MIERDO MILLAS DE VIBORAS FURIOSAS PARA ESTRANGULARTE MUERTO

kuribo

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #4 on: April 13, 2010, 12:57:51 pm »

Dwarf Fortress: Become a god by horribly mutilating yourself in fire.

 For some reason this makes me think of Silent Hill.

Dragging my melting corpse around reminded me of "Hot Potting," one of the stories in Chuck Pahalniuk's Haunted.
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I OFTEN BURN WHITE HOT AND DRIFT LAZILY ACROSS THE STRATOSPHERE EMITTING PIERCING SCREAMS JUST LIKE THE REAL SUN

Peasant

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #5 on: April 13, 2010, 03:41:51 pm »

You must have seen my post in the pain olympics thread, eh?

Anyway, i'll just put this here so you can see some melted body parts:
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

NinjaE8825

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #6 on: April 13, 2010, 04:08:00 pm »

IIRC, swimming in magma will make everything melt, eventually.
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Creamcorn

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #7 on: April 13, 2010, 04:34:55 pm »

IIRC, swimming in magma will make everything melt, eventually.

The announcements change to the proper setting too.
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"OH NO! That carp is gulping at me menacingly, even though it cannot really threaten me from here on land!  I KNOW! I'll dodge into the water, where I'll be safe!"

Satarus

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #8 on: April 14, 2010, 09:00:08 am »

Are you tired of other weight loss methods that never work.  Do you want to loose the fat without dieting or exercise or pills?  Try the new Dwarven Fire Diet.  Simply stand in fire and watch as that fat melts off your body.  You'll be down to a slimmer new you in no time.  Call today.

Dwarven Fire Diet is not responsible for any fire related damages, disfigurement, or arson charges related to the use of this product.  Consult your physician if you have any elf blood in you as this can lead to sever side effects.

Dwarven Fire Diet.  Melt those pounds away!

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Quote
You need to make said elf leather into the most amazing work of art.  Embed it with every kind of gem you have, stud it with metals, and sew images into it.  Erect a shrine outside your fort with that in the center.  Let the elves know that you view their very skin as naught more but a medium for your dwarves to work on.

LordSlowpoke

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #9 on: April 14, 2010, 09:01:27 am »

Are you tired of other weight loss methods that never work.  Do you want to loose the fat without dieting or exercise or pills?  Try the new Dwarven Fire Diet.  Simply stand in fire and watch as that fat melts off your body.  You'll be down to a slimmer new you in no time.  Call today.

Dwarven Fire Diet is not responsible for any fire related damages, disfigurement, or arson charges related to the use of this product.  Consult your physician if you have any elf blood in you as this can lead to sever side effects.

Dwarven Fire Diet.  Melt those pounds away!


Where was the "use this as the place you dump your sig in" thread again?
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Bricks

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #10 on: April 14, 2010, 11:54:32 am »

This is similar to my "become king of gods" trick where you tie yourself to the world tree and mash the wait button until you learn the secrets of runes.
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EMPATHY - being able to feel other peoples' stuff.

Box

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #11 on: April 16, 2010, 05:50:03 pm »

I have no idea what you are referencing (sounds like another roguelike) but you have piqued my interest, good sir.

asplain.
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You should come inside the box.

Then you'll know what I mean.

Judas Maccabeus

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #12 on: April 16, 2010, 06:53:47 pm »

I have no idea what you are referencing (sounds like another roguelike) but you have piqued my interest, good sir.

asplain.

Not another roguelike - if memory serves, he's referring to the Norse god Odin.  He forgot to mention the "sacrifice an eye" part, but that's a minor point.
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I'm talking about the bronze colossus. It's supposed to be made entirely of bronze.
But really he's just a softie inside. They all are really. When megabeasts come to your fort you never welcome them inside and give them a hug, do you. You heartless bastards...

Kagus

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #13 on: April 16, 2010, 06:54:58 pm »

I'm pretty sure he was just referencing Norse mythology.  I can't remember if the eye sacrifice was before or after the tree event...

I wonder when hanging will come into play in DF...  It'd add another fun thing for melancholy dwarves to do, and might even enter into the justice system.

Plus, decoration.  There's nothing quite like a few hanging bodies to really liven a place up.

Bricks

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Re: Funk's guide to makeing your self fire proof.
« Reply #14 on: April 16, 2010, 10:46:43 pm »

I have no idea what you are referencing (sounds like another roguelike) but you have piqued my interest, good sir.

asplain.

I'm pretty sure the only roguelike that will ever come close to this will be DF.
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EMPATHY - being able to feel other peoples' stuff.
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