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Poll

What should Zathel do on his turn?

Hook up FAILCANNON to magma sea (powered by a huge dwarven reactor).
- 11 (28.2%)
Build a castle over the fortress entrance.
- 11 (28.2%)
Flush all the grime from Battlefailed with carefully arranged sewage system.
- 7 (17.9%)
Construct opulent quarters for every dwarf in Battlefailed.
- 3 (7.7%)
Get rid of every Forgotten Beast using huge cave-in traps
- 7 (17.9%)

Total Members Voted: 39

Voting closed: July 31, 2010, 02:35:48 pm


Pages: 1 ... 3 4 [5] 6 7 ... 60

Author Topic: Battlefailed (Succession) Legendary Clusterf**k, free for all reclaim  (Read 278347 times)

heyguys

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #60 on: May 12, 2010, 08:43:13 pm »

Okay, good to know!

In other news in my private fortress I had the entire fort massacred by a magma man who could not be killed by wrestlers. That made me mad, but I was happy about this update.

I'll request a Redwarf from the next group of migrants that survive long enough to make it into safety.

Name: HeyGuys II
Profession: Brother

edit: I can't imagine that we have any picks. For that matter I have no idea how we will get farms either.
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Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #61 on: May 12, 2010, 08:45:49 pm »

...

RAGE. KILL THE UNDEAD.

Will redorf on my turn.
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Quote from: LordSlowpoke
I don't know how it works. It does.
Quote from: Jim Groovester
YOU CANT NOT HAVE SUSPECTS IN A GAME OF MAFIA

ITS THE WHOLE POINT OF THE GAME
Quote from: Cheeetar
If Tiruin redirected the lynch, then this means that, and... the Illuminati! Of course!

Robocorn

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #62 on: May 12, 2010, 09:15:53 pm »

Do we have picks in our possesion or are they all outside?

you've got the only one inside buddy.
...

RAGE. KILL THE UNDEAD.

Will redorf on my turn.
Still alive man, you may win a gold in the pain olympics. you have no teeth, are blind, all of the bones in your hands are broken (ALL of them) and you've been in a coma for three months.
« Last Edit: May 12, 2010, 09:18:07 pm by Robocorn »
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Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #63 on: May 12, 2010, 09:24:14 pm »

Still alive man, you may win a gold in the pain olympics. you have no teeth, are blind, all of the bones in your hands are broken (ALL of them) and you've been in a coma for three months.

I highly doubt I'll survive the next two years.

EDIT: I'm more wounded than Heyguys, and he's been there longer. I'm like the dwarven Terminator, I just won't ****ing die. If I'm still alive by autumn, find a way to drop a cave-in on me.
« Last Edit: May 12, 2010, 10:30:49 pm by Urist Imiknorris »
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Quote from: LordSlowpoke
I don't know how it works. It does.
Quote from: Jim Groovester
YOU CANT NOT HAVE SUSPECTS IN A GAME OF MAFIA

ITS THE WHOLE POINT OF THE GAME
Quote from: Cheeetar
If Tiruin redirected the lynch, then this means that, and... the Illuminati! Of course!

Krimson

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #64 on: May 12, 2010, 10:03:10 pm »

Are we busy at work creating an underground bungalo?  Rly sucks we dont have the wimminz to repopulate our dwarven culture but hey,  dwarfs live long enough to make life worthwhile.
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Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #65 on: May 12, 2010, 10:36:51 pm »

Can I see my thoughts screen?
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Quote from: LordSlowpoke
I don't know how it works. It does.
Quote from: Jim Groovester
YOU CANT NOT HAVE SUSPECTS IN A GAME OF MAFIA

ITS THE WHOLE POINT OF THE GAME
Quote from: Cheeetar
If Tiruin redirected the lynch, then this means that, and... the Illuminati! Of course!

Matuin

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #66 on: May 12, 2010, 11:23:24 pm »

This thread is so full of win.
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Robocorn

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #67 on: May 12, 2010, 11:40:13 pm »

Diary of Robocorn Betanlorbam
It has come to my attention that our expedition leader Andreus may never be gracin' our humble halls so that I'll never get to have that final conversation with him, I can only hope enshal Dawnfuture delivers this message to him "Do you think Led was born with that stick up 'er bum, or do you think it involved some accident involving a flagpole and fallin' off an obsidian tower?" I wound up getting my booze, but it tastes bitter without someone t' share it with, well krimson's here an' he's a great help, but I dinnae want th' representative from Graspedseduc'd t' get th' wrong impression when he finds our one bed and our brotherly platonic relationship.

Krimson keeps doing this strange thing where he has a tantrum in his sleep. It seems to bother me but since I have yet t' lift a finger since we got down here, I ain't complainin' of his night terrors.

The silly dorf toppled th' mason workshop, he then put it back together. doesn't bother me in the slightest, as long as he cleans up.


This guy is nuts, he loses his temper constantly an' he takes it out on th' rocks. I'm sure e'll get over it eventually.

The f**ker attacked me, Robocorn ain't takin' this sittin' down!
I guess I am now that th' motherf**ker broke both my legs!!


Arright, I can kind o' understand the fist fight, an all th' tension we be havin' bu I'm not really in a situation to do any work at all now, as long as e's alright he should be able to wait on me head and foot. Bastard deserves to.

Stop takin' a f**kin' break an get me t' Th' F**kin' bed!


It's been weeks, th' bastard 'as been takin' 'is break fer weeks. I cannae get up an get a drink an th' bastard win nae carry me t' th' bed a couple o' feet away. Is this how it ends fer me? alone with this phsycho. where he'll toil alone in Battlefailed forever and do who knows what to my corpse. I accept my fate fer know, what would motivate a person t' come t' th' Blueness o' Malodors anyway?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
oh boy.

These migrants are th' bet thing that ever happened t' me, they put my ornery bum in bed an' brought another pick an' axe with 'em, they'll not make th' mistakes I did. Though they do seem a bit dissappointed at th' state o' things, they said that Led told them o' a grand dwarven utopia, well, welcome t' Battlefailed.


Can I see my thoughts screen?
If you want a quick laugh here it is
« Last Edit: May 13, 2010, 12:02:01 am by Robocorn »
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SethCreiyd

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #68 on: May 13, 2010, 01:25:22 am »

It's nice to see how shared hardships can bring two dwarves closer together.  Too bad those migrants had to ruin the intimacy.
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heyguys

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #69 on: May 13, 2010, 01:44:21 am »

Build some beds! hopefull they can carry the rest of the extremely wounded back to safety where they can stay in a coma for the next thirty years as they naturally heal.

edit: oh wait, that's right, we have no natural water. fuck.
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Zathel

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #70 on: May 13, 2010, 02:23:09 am »

Check the nobles screen. We're basically fucked if we can't appoint nobles.

Build some beds! hopefull they can carry the rest of the extremely wounded back to safety where they can stay in a coma for the next thirty years as they naturally heal.

edit: oh wait, that's right, we have no natural water. fuck.

I think that due to a bug, building a well over source of salt water turns it drinkable. I guess dwarfs install desalinization filters in all their wells or something.
« Last Edit: May 13, 2010, 02:25:12 am by Zathel »
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heyguys

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #71 on: May 13, 2010, 04:03:13 am »

Check the nobles screen. We're basically fucked if we can't appoint nobles.

According to Magmawiki, once we grow sufficiently in size we get the equivalent when the dwarves vote on a mayor.
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Matuin

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #72 on: May 13, 2010, 04:19:21 am »

Check the nobles screen. We're basically fucked if we can't appoint nobles.

According to Magmawiki, once we grow sufficiently in size we get the equivalent when the dwarves vote on a mayor.

We have to have 50 dwarfs to get a mayor.

This'll be fun..
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heyguys

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #73 on: May 13, 2010, 04:37:45 am »

Also, given Urist the Blue's stats; if we get him medical treatment I see no reason why he won't survive.
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Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Battlefailed (Succession) Coastal Zombie Hellscape.
« Reply #74 on: May 13, 2010, 07:07:05 am »

Surgery is bugged, so I'll probably still be blind, among other things. And it would take about five years worth of constant medical care.

EDIT: Oh my god I'm still happy. HOW AM I NOT MISERABLE. Oh wait, I probably have Kirby music stuck in my head.

EDIT2: Why is my dwarf so broken? Her thoughts screen shows her as "basically unbreakable, incredibly quick to heal, mighty, and very agile." I have GONE BEYOND THE IMPOSSIBLE.
« Last Edit: May 13, 2010, 10:19:28 am by Urist Imiknorris »
Logged
Quote from: LordSlowpoke
I don't know how it works. It does.
Quote from: Jim Groovester
YOU CANT NOT HAVE SUSPECTS IN A GAME OF MAFIA

ITS THE WHOLE POINT OF THE GAME
Quote from: Cheeetar
If Tiruin redirected the lynch, then this means that, and... the Illuminati! Of course!
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