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Author Topic: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves  (Read 1490635 times)

Monomstodir

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6990 on: August 03, 2017, 01:32:22 pm »

Dear Urist McMiner,

When I asked you to channel out the floor above the magma accident, I made sure to ensure you had an exit route - you're a legendarily talented miner, I'd quite like you to stay alive. So, I'm somewhat perplexed to see that you've managed to strand yourself on a pillar of obsidian, having carefully removed all the floor around you. Presumably I missed this potential when designating the mining orders, and so I'm going to carefully build some floor out to you, rather than risk you being swept into the obsidian casting floor when the water pumpers get going. Nevertheless, in the future can we assume that stranding yourself in literally the only point you could possibly do so is not an implicit part of the work orders?


ETA:

Dear Urist McSmelter: You are climbing over a stockpile filled exclusively with the one ore I've asked you to smelt to go grab a lump still in the mine 25z levels up and at the far corner of the map to you. Why?

Best regards
« Last Edit: August 03, 2017, 03:50:12 pm by Monomstodir »
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Eschar

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6991 on: August 03, 2017, 07:11:55 pm »

Dear Dwarves of Problemearth,
I realize that telling you to irrigate a completely flat area may have caused you understandable panic, and even that you drop the buckets which you carried with you.
But that is no excuse for ignoring the dropped buckets - and giving hauling chert more priority - once the miners have channeled out the area. Unless you want to run out of food when the next batches of hungry migrants have arrived, I suggest you get to it.
 
- Very sincerely, your Benevolent Overlord
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pikachu17

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6992 on: August 04, 2017, 12:43:39 pm »

Dear Dwarves of Problemearth,
I realize that telling you to irrigate a completely flat area may have caused you understandable panic, and even that you drop the buckets which you carried with you.
But that is no excuse for ignoring the dropped buckets - and giving hauling chert more priority - once the miners have channeled out the area. Unless you want to run out of food when the next batches of hungry migrants have arrived, I suggest you get to it.
 
- Very sincerely, your Benevolent Overlord
Water is unnecessary for farming. You could also remove all hauling jobs except water hauling, then he won't haul chert.
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Eschar

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6993 on: August 04, 2017, 02:22:19 pm »

Dear Dwarves of Problemearth,
I realize that telling you to irrigate a completely flat area may have caused you understandable panic, and even that you drop the buckets which you carried with you.
But that is no excuse for ignoring the dropped buckets - and giving hauling chert more priority - once the miners have channeled out the area. Unless you want to run out of food when the next batches of hungry migrants have arrived, I suggest you get to it.
 
- Very sincerely, your Benevolent Overlord
Water is unnecessary for farming. You could also remove all hauling jobs except water hauling, then he won't haul chert.
Don't I need mud to create a farm plot?
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pikachu17

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6994 on: August 04, 2017, 03:06:05 pm »

Are you unable to build the farm on actual dirt? Can you build a farm on non-dirt if it is muddy?
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Eschar

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6995 on: August 04, 2017, 03:43:14 pm »

Are you unable to build the farm on actual dirt? Can you build a farm on non-dirt if it is muddy?
I have silty clay loam mostly, and apparently I can only create a plot on it if it is also a cavern floor tile.
If it's aboveground, the build interface reads "Needs mud/soil for farm."
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Fleeting Frames

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6996 on: August 04, 2017, 06:57:31 pm »

Ignore DF interface, build anyway.

Nevermind, confused it with "No mud/soil for farm"
« Last Edit: August 04, 2017, 07:30:45 pm by Fleeting Frames »
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Dunamisdeos

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6997 on: August 04, 2017, 07:28:32 pm »

Are you unable to build the farm on actual dirt? Can you build a farm on non-dirt if it is muddy?
I have silty clay loam mostly, and apparently I can only create a plot on it if it is also a cavern floor tile.
If it's aboveground, the build interface reads "Needs mud/soil for farm."

You are in a biome that does not allow most plants, it sounds like. A glacier, perhaps?

In this case underground plants are the only things that can grow.
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Eschar

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6998 on: August 05, 2017, 03:43:56 pm »

Are you unable to build the farm on actual dirt? Can you build a farm on non-dirt if it is muddy?
I have silty clay loam mostly, and apparently I can only create a plot on it if it is also a cavern floor tile.
If it's aboveground, the build interface reads "Needs mud/soil for farm."

You are in a biome that does not allow most plants, it sounds like. A glacier, perhaps?

In this case underground plants are the only things that can grow.
Are plump helmets underground plants? There go all my plans for massive aboveground farms...
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Dunamisdeos

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6999 on: August 05, 2017, 05:02:33 pm »

Are you unable to build the farm on actual dirt? Can you build a farm on non-dirt if it is muddy?
I have silty clay loam mostly, and apparently I can only create a plot on it if it is also a cavern floor tile.
If it's aboveground, the build interface reads "Needs mud/soil for farm."

You are in a biome that does not allow most plants, it sounds like. A glacier, perhaps?

In this case underground plants are the only things that can grow.
Are plump helmets underground plants? There go all my plans for massive aboveground farms...

They are indeed! You will need tiles with soil/moss/mud underground to grow food and booze if you can't grow above ground.
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FACT III: "All life begins with Post-it notes and ends with Post-it notes. This is the truth! This is my belief!...At least for now."
FACT IV: SPEECHO THE TRUSTWORM IS YOUR FRIEND or BEHOLD: THE FRUIT ENGINE 3.0

asialsky

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #7000 on: August 11, 2017, 09:47:34 pm »

Dear Urist McEverybody,

While I understand that the nightly cage matches between disarmed gobbos and our beserk vampire ex mayor might be a staple in your routine, I'd like to inform you that I am placing a bounty on him. He hasn't had so much as a scratch, and bit the arm off of the were-armadillo we caught in no time flat. I fear he is a threat to the fortress, and must be dealt with post haste.

The first useless migrant to slay him will be granted the honor of being captain of the guard.

With only minor sympathy,
Overseer
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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #7001 on: August 12, 2017, 04:54:18 pm »

Berserk vampire? Husk him too, and then use him as superweapon.

thoa

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #7002 on: August 13, 2017, 03:41:59 am »

dear dwarves

if you must throw STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM THE GODDAM LEVER THAT UNLOCKS THE GATE TO THE DEMON HIVE THAT IS THE ACTUAL HELL YOU MORON. YOU MIGRATED TO A FORTRESS THAT IS A DESTROYED DARK FORTRESS AND YET YOU STILL NEARLY Destroy IT BECAUSE OF A CAT. WHY
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Dragonunion

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #7003 on: August 13, 2017, 03:49:53 am »

Dear Urist,

please learn how to climb down walls and trees. It's ok that you can climb, but ist a big Problem that you still stuck in the moat which you channeled down or stand on the top of the tree.
I know you fear the height and the way up, but it would be a good idea to think about this BEFORE you do this! :D
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Monomstodir

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #7004 on: August 14, 2017, 12:56:40 pm »

Hey Guys, guys - great idea! You know how you all hate getting caught in a miasma? This is just a idea, but what about if we hauled the half-eaten food/crundle arm (who brought this up here?)/dead escapee yak calves out to the dump before they rotted? Rather than everyone standing around looking at the putrifying lump and waiting for someone else to haul it? We're gonna have to move it anyway after all, this way we don't wave to wait until it's gone runny and everyone's vomiting.
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