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Author Topic: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves  (Read 1492277 times)

Rain At Dawn

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6600 on: February 13, 2016, 07:59:50 pm »

Please stop attending a party when there is only one more fucking tile to mine!

This. Definitely this.
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Rain At Dawn

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6601 on: February 13, 2016, 08:00:26 pm »

To my overly fecund wee darlings,

While I like seeing a few cute kids running around as much as the next evil overlord, I'm not running a Quiverfull fortress here. Surely you don't need to be popping one out every single year; you already have twelve! I wouldn't need to issue a fiat prohibiting all "recreation time" if you could only show a little restraint.

Seriously considering sentient gelding Family Planning centers,
The Voice of Moderation
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Corona688

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6602 on: February 13, 2016, 10:01:05 pm »

To the families of the failed SilverRope expedition,
While it is against the Overseer culture to send apologies to the family of the deceased, I feel the expediency of the failure and death of all 7 of the expedition members would merit some sort of explanation. When we arrived to the location everything seemed to be in order, it was only when we started striking the earth and cutting down trees did we begin to get a downpour of water. At this point everything froze to a halt as water began to pour down on us in waterfall like manner, in confusion I looked up only to see a body of water, several meters thick, resting above our heads. It was then that I realized that our expedition was doomed from the start.
If it is any condolence, I'm sure that the 5 seconds between founding and drowning set some sort of record for outpost failure that will be remembered for generations to come.

With regards,
The Overseer
There's a a pretty tough record to beat..  considering its also happened with lava.

http://mkv25.net/dfma/movie-701-shortestfortever
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Spinning Fly

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6603 on: February 14, 2016, 08:16:18 am »

Dear Urist McMiner,

Please stop attending a party when there is only one more fucking tile to mine!

Somewhat related...

Dear Urist McMiner,

Please stop harvesting plants every single time I ask you to dig ANYTHING. Seriously, you're a fucking LEGENDARY GROWER already, and you haven't planted a single seed in your entire life!



BTW does anyone else's dwarves have this mysterious harvest addiction? When I set an area to be dug out, at first she'll "accept" and 1 of the tiles will start flashing, she'll start walking there etc. Then the moron will suddenly decide that there's some fucking radish that needs to be pulled out IMMEDIATELY and just wordlessly cancels the mining task and goes off to harvest. It's been a huge pain in the arse, especially when I was digging out some area for magma workshops about 100 z-levels below the farms. She seriously went down about 80 z-levels, then went up to harvest, then went back down and dug 1-2 tiles, went back up to harvest etc.

It seems to only affect some of my dwarves. Of the original seven, excluding the guy who's actually a planter, I have the aforementioned miner at legendary, another miner at competent, a mason/mechanic at proficient, a carpenter at professional and 2 military guys (who were basically peasant haulers for much of the first 2 years) at dabbling and novice (rusty).

All of these dwarves besides the 2 military guys had all hauling and other jobs disabled, so that might have been a factor. However, some of the other early arrivals like a couple of glassmakers and potters also had hauling disabled and are only at dabbling. Plus for this fort I started farming only after the first couple of waves, so the founders didn't have a head start or anything.

I also have about 20 guys who have literally no job but hauling, and another 20 or so medical dwarves and off-duty military who also have hauling enabled, so it's not due to any lack of manpower.

Any ideas on why this might be happening?
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TheFlame52

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6604 on: February 14, 2016, 09:40:09 am »

Go to 'o'rders, tell only farmers to harvest.

Spinning Fly

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6605 on: February 14, 2016, 10:19:14 am »

I didn't want to do that because I have quite a lot of farm plots, so they'd probably waste too much time harvesting. Though I could just enable planting on some of the haulers and let them help out. I'll probably do that now.

But still, doesn't solve the mystery of why that particular miner was so obsessed with harvesting ???
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Aseaheru

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6606 on: February 14, 2016, 10:23:00 am »

 Probably decided it was too much of a walk to mine.

 Dunno. Almost all my woodcutters wind up deciding that cutting wood is impossible after a year or two, probably for a similar reason.
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Spinning Fly

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6607 on: February 14, 2016, 10:37:39 am »

Probably decided it was too much of a walk to mine.

Oh she still mines. Sometimes in the middle of a mining job, she'll randomly decide to go off and pluck a couple potatoes, drop them off at the stockpile, and then continue digging. And then after a while, she does it again -_-. If anything, she thinks mining doesn't involve enough walking

I've honestly never enabled the planting labour on her, and somehow she managed to become a legendary grower just from harvesting. And she did it as a legendary miner, not a hauler or some other jobless sap who hangs around the tavern all the time.

Dunno. Almost all my woodcutters wind up deciding that cutting wood is impossible after a year or two, probably for a similar reason.

I haven't experienced that issue. But then again, my woodcutters usually don't survive more than a year or 2, heroically sacrificing themselves to save the rest of the civilians from the goblins/titans/assorted cavern beasties.
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Aseaheru

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6608 on: February 14, 2016, 11:40:28 am »

 I dont have any issues with fighting till year four or five, mostly because I dont go looking for the caverns for a while. Sometimes it takes a decade or two before I find one.
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mirrizin

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6609 on: February 14, 2016, 07:55:03 pm »

So, for efficiency's sake, I insist that the squads in charge of guarding the caverns be armed and armored in bronze.

All you guys guarding the surface have more than enough iron, and even some steel, to cover your hides.

So why oh why do you insist on stealing the bronze armor I made specifically for the cavern guards? You're really slowing things down, and I hope I don't have to specifically command you to wear steel and iron armor.  >:(
« Last Edit: February 14, 2016, 08:00:38 pm by mirrizin »
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MoonyTheHuman

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6610 on: February 14, 2016, 09:30:57 pm »

So, for efficiency's sake, I insist that the squads in charge of guarding the caverns be armed and armored in bronze.

All you guys guarding the surface have more than enough iron, and even some steel, to cover your hides.

So why oh why do you insist on stealing the bronze armor I made specifically for the cavern guards? You're really slowing things down, and I hope I don't have to specifically command you to wear steel and iron armor.  >:(
Dear
Dear mirrizin
unless you force us to, we were wht ever we ant, its a free fort
From urist

mirrizin

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6611 on: February 14, 2016, 10:48:02 pm »

So, for efficiency's sake, I insist that the squads in charge of guarding the caverns be armed and armored in bronze.

All you guys guarding the surface have more than enough iron, and even some steel, to cover your hides.

So why oh why do you insist on stealing the bronze armor I made specifically for the cavern guards? You're really slowing things down, and I hope I don't have to specifically command you to wear steel and iron armor.  >:(
Dear
Dear mirrizin
unless you force us to, we were wht ever we ant, its a free fort
From urist
That's all well and good, but when you see the goblins coming over the hill, could you stand your guard instead of running back to the fort to grab the latest set of boots?
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Urist_McArathos

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6612 on: February 15, 2016, 01:20:35 am »

Memorandum to All:

Stop walking on the ice.

STOP WALKING ON THE FUCKING ICE.

Stop it!  It's marked restricted, there's a damned bridge that isn't, STAY OFF THE GODDAMNED ICE.

None of you drunken sods knows how to swim, so for the last Armok-loving time....

STOP.  WALKING.  ON.  THE.  ICE!!!
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MobRules

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6613 on: February 15, 2016, 04:07:15 pm »

To my overly fecund wee darlings,

While I like seeing a few cute kids running around as much as the next evil overlord, I'm not running a Quiverfull fortress here. Surely you don't need to be popping one out every single year; you already have twelve! I wouldn't need to issue a fiat prohibiting all "recreation time" if you could only show a little restraint.

Seriously considering sentient gelding Family Planning centers,
The Voice of Moderation

Have you tried setting the child cap in the init file to something sane?

But still, doesn't solve the mystery of why that particular miner was so obsessed with harvesting ???
Have you checked her preferences/personality/etc? She might be more temperamentally disposed to farming than to mining.
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TheFlame52

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Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #6614 on: February 15, 2016, 04:34:25 pm »

But still, doesn't solve the mystery of why that particular miner was so obsessed with harvesting ???
Are they the first person on the units list? They're the first person to get a job. And if you have everyone harvesting, then there you go.
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