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Author Topic: FailCannon: No Rest for the Wicked (or anyone else) (Succession: Battlefailed 2)  (Read 897865 times)

CatalystParadox

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2145 on: October 05, 2011, 01:07:46 pm »

There this odd star-shaped mountain range in the south-west corner of the world map far from the forts. It's kind of interesting to me because of the big lake (or small sea) imbedded in the mountains. On top of that there is a rather big piece of land in the lake/sea. I haven't seen an odd formation like that in any of the worlds I've generated so far.


Well, that's my research for the day. I though it would be an interesting distraction for a bit.

I like this idea - and it ties into SethCreiyds' Goings-On-Of-The-Gods stories, as well!  I propose that if and when we are ready for a follow-up, Seth lead us into it with whatever culmination his metaplot is building to!

And... that was amazing Strategia.  Add it to the Codex Failcannon!
« Last Edit: October 05, 2011, 01:15:12 pm by CatalystParadox »
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My proud turn in Failcannon | Uzolnom - "Oiledgod"

Quote from: Mego
I opened up the Unread Replies page and saw that you were the last poster. I got scared. Something about you posting scares me, ever since Failcannon.

Mego

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2146 on: October 05, 2011, 05:33:04 pm »

Strategia, if you don't mind, I'm going to make some minor modifications, to make it sound like a hellhole rather than a whorehouse, and make it a bit truer to the original song.

Spoiler: Version 1.1 (click to show/hide)

Also, some more inspired music from me:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Not the best song written for Failcannon, but I think it's decent at least. Free grave and memorial for whoever can name the song.

Eric Blank

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2147 on: October 05, 2011, 07:32:16 pm »

Failcannon needed it's own songs... Good work!

Now then, I can write up my first post sometime tonight, as I've already played the majority of granite just observing the fortress. Fun is imminent, but killing them off without explicit intent is still beyond my abilities.

Post!

Post Humus journal of Erica Wheelcircles the Legendary Die-r

   Granite 1st 539.

Today I decided to begin making attempts to control the fortress. It’s been slow, as this idiot I’ve possessed has no desire to simply speak to the others. Forcing her to take the job of overseer took months of pushing her before the position was even open.
She’s got the position though, since nobody else was willing to, aside from That lunatic Aussie-Dwarf. I can use her to give direct orders to the others now. I’ve given up possessing her at all times, but rather only when I need to.

Granite 5th 539.

Going well, I convinced the other dwarves that since there’s nothing specific needs done for now, they should clean up the mess. I’ve also begun a project to restrict all access to areas of the fortress we have no use for; strip mines, old rooms, catacombs with no space and which hold no tomb that any of the other spirits around me claim is incomplete. I’m also forbidding the items therein, I want them to be forgotten for the moment while I figure out a decent garbage disposal system. Atom smashers worked well before…

I needed to rest and store up energy so I left the fool to herself and the ghost of Twobeard. They’re apparently getting along well now…

The sands of time surge forward without fail, and I find the world is still as bitter and merciless as ever. The other spirits I see, those not eternally slumbering, have plans of their own. One dwarf who died of horrible infections caused by the terrible beasts below warned me that he felt the dwarves should at least wear shoes all the time, and preferably military equipment. I whole-heartedly agree, and thus I used the girl to convince the others to dress in military uniform, regardless of the fact they won’t be partaking in normal military procedures.

Granite 18th 539.

I was horrified to find that the fools hadn’t begun using their uniforms, and so I ordered a mandatory defensive drill and had everyone report to the control room.

And on the 19th of Granite arcangelsd said to meee: “I’m f#$@&^% drowning you famthut agak! Save me!”

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Alas I had no ability to neither swim nor ethereal power enough to lift him off the seabed so my possessing him did nothing but permit him to die without feeling the pain himself. Ungrateful elf was right pissed at me, either way. Not my fault, he chose to go out there for a gauntlet which there were plenty of duplicates of.
By the 25th Granite, they had all gotten their gear together and were stationed, all 8 of them, in the control room. I possessed Erica to relay to them the news of arcangelsd’s death below the waves, claiming that she saw him trip and fall in. I mean what the hell else could have happened? A sudden zombie-tigershark attack? Not a zombie for… a few yards at least. Nothing he had LOS with from the STFO...
I think they were mildly suspicious of her because of this, but mostly they just accepted it…

   I ended the drill and told everyone to remain in uniform. The next morning when I came to check on my minion, she was naked again (damn close to it, anyway.), and upon further inspection, so is everyone else. I am thoroughly disappointed, but the other spirits found it rather amusing how we all end up dead together because of our ignorance of one another’s mistakes, and told me not to dwell on it. Without a true afterlife it seems, life goes on and on forever as disembodied spirits, and still nobody sane enough to care does care. Or maybe we’re all insane, who could diagnose the diagnoser of our insanity as sane themselves?

OoC: I don’t actually know why. As far as I can tell their orders are structured as any militia squad I’ve ever managed, who would happily wear their uniform literally everywhere, at any time, with standing orders or not. Any help with this is appreciated.

Granite 26th 539

While convening with the other spirits in the lowest, flooded quarter of Failcannon, we all witnessed one of the many horrid monsters dwelling there, Vesh Amasmondul Ibruknunur Rash, an enormous serpent, wander over to a door and smash it down without provocation, and then wander away nonchalantly. I swear those things are even more messed up in the head than any number of us.

Nobody had any ideas, and few had any interest, so the business of keeping the living alive and smarter than they currently are is left to me alone.

Soapalope later suggested I deconstruct vast portions of the fortress and remodel them, internally at least, so that it may be navigated more easily. I’m not sure if I’m up to such a daunting task with just 8 dwarves at my disposal…


Edit:
A spirit I met manifesting herself high over the ground, DuckThatQuacks, informed me of her intention to find the single most valuable item in the fortress - by usefulness or historical significance - and hide it "so that all may perish in fire and rot, and even the gods forget that Failcannon ever existed." I say she's absolutely bonkers, but she hasn't moved an inch, so i question whether she just wanted to get rid of me, or if she knows some obscure method to viewing the world around her. I haven't yet given the living the order to enchant a memorial stone to capture her soul yet, either way.

And so begins another year of utter misery in the fortress of Failcannon.
« Last Edit: October 05, 2011, 08:51:13 pm by Eric Blank »
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I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Mego

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2148 on: October 05, 2011, 08:48:44 pm »

killing them off without explicit intent is still beyond my abilities.

Only in Failcannon can an overseer do nothing for a month and have nothing change.

Snipe-edit:

OoC: I don’t actually know why. As far as I can tell their orders are structured as any militia squad I’ve ever managed, who would happily wear their uniform literally everywhere, at any time, with standing orders or not. Any help with this is appreciated.

Probably a glitch due to the fact that the world was genned several DF versions ago. Also consider that nothing ever goes right in Failcannon, so this was somewhat to be expected.
« Last Edit: October 05, 2011, 08:53:54 pm by Mego »
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EmeraldWind

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2149 on: October 05, 2011, 10:54:04 pm »

OoC: I don’t actually know why. As far as I can tell their orders are structured as any militia squad I’ve ever managed, who would happily wear their uniform literally everywhere, at any time, with standing orders or not. Any help with this is appreciated.

Did you make sure under Squad schedules to set it so you see:
Inactive = Uniformed

If you can see "Inactive = Civ clothes" they will get naked.

I know its probably a 'duh' thing, but sometimes its the simple problems that are the most baffling.
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Eric Blank

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2150 on: October 06, 2011, 12:18:37 am »

Yes, actually it is set for them to wear uniforms when inactive in the schedules screen.

Fortunately, we have migrants. A single siege operator. Odd. Trying to let him inside. Well, who desires a dorf?

I know exactly how Andreus felt when he wrote what is now my signature.
« Last Edit: October 06, 2011, 12:24:15 am by Eric Blank »
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Scaraban

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2151 on: October 06, 2011, 12:20:43 am »

I'll take 'im.
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Eric Blank

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2152 on: October 06, 2011, 12:24:33 am »

Scaraban it is... The ghost of Twobeard is already trying to make frends with you. No wonder you ran back and forth around the entry room for about twice as long as it took Catalyst to come raise the bridge and trap you inside. I'd be freaked out too if the first dwarf I met in my new and final home were a ghost.

Anyways, tomorrow will see a real update. Now is an excellent time to sleep.

Strangely enough, there are four (living) groundhogs submerged in 7/7s water underground. They were there the last time I looked at the save as well (couple years ago). Somehow this doesn't seem normal...

Actually, we may well have a pretty damn severe issue on our hands. More on this tomorrow...
« Last Edit: October 06, 2011, 12:35:58 am by Eric Blank »
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Scaraban

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2153 on: October 06, 2011, 01:05:22 am »

Scaraban it is... The ghost of Twobeard is already trying to make frends with you. No wonder you ran back and forth around the entry room for about twice as long as it took Catalyst to come raise the bridge and trap you inside. I'd be freaked out too if the first dwarf I met in my new and final home were a ghost.

Actually, we may well have a pretty damn severe issue on our hands. More on this tomorrow...
Nothing but good news, then? Capital!
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Mekboy

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2154 on: October 06, 2011, 07:54:34 am »

I'd like to be redorfed when one becomes available.
Name me Mekboy IV, with a proffession of 'Doom Prophet'.


Mekboy sighed. Cast once more from her earthly shell, she could see the doom that was speedily approaching Failcannon. A tear in the aether, a rip in reality itself. She would have to stop it. Or at least save those that she could from Failcannon. Time to get to work. Finding a mind suitable took a while, and one that was near enough to Failcannon took even longer. Soon, however, she found one. Forcefully overiding its fragile psyche, she took control. Blinking a few times, she looked around. She appeared to be among a group of migrants, ordered to Failcannon by Queen Led. That would be good enough for her.
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Aw, Mekboy! A song for meeeee?
You're so sweet.  Why don't you just come in here so I can give you a hug.
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You seem to be under the illusion that we give a shit about what happens to dwarves who are too dumb to live.

ThatAussieGuy

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2155 on: October 06, 2011, 08:12:16 am »

Journal of That Aussie Dwarf

Entry -33-

I'm beginning to wonder how so many dwarves keep coming back from the dead - That salesman told me i bought the last Junior Dwarf Disguise kit he had (with real horsehair beard extensions and non-lead hair dye for fooling your friends and Forgotten Beasts).  I wonder if they got the deluxe kit with the false eyebrows and pillow to stick under your tunic.  They look nothing like they used to, i swear...
« Last Edit: October 06, 2011, 08:17:35 am by ThatAussieGuy »
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arcangelsd

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2156 on: October 06, 2011, 09:52:40 am »

Arcangelsd stood... well, floated shocked in disbelief when that unknown entity just came and removed him from his recently adquired, and dying, husk. "A-another bodyjumper? I thought I was the only one to do it! Well, lucky me that I prepared myself for this eventuality..." He said as he started floating up to the FCN memorial. "I hope none of those bodyjumpers have noticed the reason behind putting my coffin just below the wave emiter, because if they do... well, let's not think about that. Just keep going to the tower"
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Did we just made reality itself commit suicide?
I think that sentence describes all of Failcannon.

Eric Blank

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2157 on: October 06, 2011, 01:09:57 pm »

Another update! Two Months have passed. We came very close to death...

   I haven’t written in a long time, I feel less and less desire to. I suppose I should disclose the events of the last months.

   On the 28th of Granite, Vesh lost her temper yet again and destroyed another door in the flooded sections. With her entire body rotting away in her kins' excretions she must be in excruciating pain, but alas only the spirits of her fellow forgotten beasts could possess her to ease this pain, and only the living could end it. I haven’t seen a single spirit of a forgotten beast, however. Perhaps they have no true souls, like the lesser beasts? Goblins too angry to leave (and who have broken the spell of Queen Led and thus were not drawn away to be reincarnated.) and elves bent on yelling at us about our resource usage are plenty, though.

   On the 18th of Slate, a migrant arrived. He was under no possessions, and the dead demand their chances with the living, but Catalyst refused, saying this one was useful in his own right. Twobeard was the first to greet him, the lunatic. Being a ghost, the dwarf was absolutely terrified of him and Catalyst barely managed to close the gate behind him. We’ve learned his trades and he has been dubbed ‘Scaraban’ for whatever reason. He was an adventurer, unaltered by Led’s wicked ways, and hearing of Failcannon’s demise he came looking for both a challenge and a grand reward. He’s one of us now, though.

   On the 24th of Slate, a zombie buzzard of Led’s design swooped down and started wrecking things, only really damaging a shale statue it knocked over. It was quickly put down by the living.

   Unfortunately, it was a distraction. There was another zombie buzzard, more directly controlled by Led, which was tinkering with a floodgate directly beneath Garbage Dump A, where water flowed into a tunnel sealed by three such gates from an entirely open fortress. When DuckThatQuacks spotted it, he raised the alarm like I never thought a spirit could; all the living dwarves heard him bellowing from deep under ground and rushed to the surface to deal with the beast. That Aussie-Dwarf guy was the first to arrive, and easily dealt with it.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

   A crisis so ingenious and destructive, averted at the last instant. Knowing what zombies were capable of, and what Led desires, I was absolutely terrified to think we’d come so close to our own watery graves. Well, most of our graves would just be getting more damp than they were, but the living were pretty concerned.

   On the 27th of Slate, the insane spirit of ‘Cheese’ Adilishen took a cave spider silk hood off a goblin corpse and hid it, yapping about how none of us would ever find it and how smart he felt. Idiot.

   On the 3rd Felsite, Catalyst finally got a chance to have a mandate finished; Mormota made a sterling silver door for her.

   Then on the 8th Felsite, ‘DuckThatQuacks’ finally found what he thinks is the metaphorical keystone of our world; an undecorated, foreign giant cave spider silk cloak one of the other spirits had been wearing when they died. His maniacal laughter was fully audible to even the forgotten beasts in the depths of the magma sea, but only served to reinforce the expressions of all the other spirits, seeming to say “are you bloody serious? :\”

   Today is the 18th Felsite. Duck-That-Quacks-Maniacally and Cheese have gone back to moping about their boredom after realizing how helpful they had actually been by dealing with some of the trash through simply making it vanish. The living are left wandering around cleaning up the trash while the dead look for entertainment and watch for threats.

   I witnessed arcangelsd making his way up to the top of his tower. He still refuses to speak to me. Mekboy also departed us, two other spirits I’ve never met before coming along with him. Said they were to look for fresh meat to send our way and any migrants Queen Led may have sent as saboteurs and break their possessions, bringing them safely to Failcannon, to labor until death, in the name of the dead who possess them. This Fortress is no refuge after all; nobody came here to live. Queen Led made sure of that, and still those who come, regardless of intention, die here in unspeakable ways when they have toiled long enough to earn our trust. They become the denizens of the Palace of the Dead, the Necropolis, which they had built.

   I see now why Failcannon is the great crossroads of the universe, of every universe, as Lur Thiefwitch tells us. It is such because it is destined to be the last great battleground against the goddess of death and Queen Led. But none of those fighting will be alive, oh no. When no living soul stands in Failcannon to stave off the stagnation of ruinhood, when their labor that defends it ceases, Led and her armies of forsaken and unlucky souls will descend upon us, the last free souls in the multiverse, to decide whether the afterlife will ever again be open to the souls of the dead, and whether any soul will ever again know peace, in any world, of any god. The 400 souls here will defend, but only time will tell. Only time and willpower fight in the Wars of the Dead. We can measure our strength of will, but when is always the question.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
It wasn't particularly eventful. I haven't begun or continued any real projects, but have made it my goal to contain the insanity that lingers in our architecture. Perhaps though the Dead need a source of power, and ethereal defenses.

I really am left to think of Failcannon as the Palace of the Dead, and Failcannon itself representing as much the weapon of the last battle of the apocalypse as the labors of dwarves who refuse to die.
« Last Edit: October 06, 2011, 01:28:23 pm by Eric Blank »
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Karakzon

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2158 on: October 06, 2011, 01:39:26 pm »

One last megaproject: Something to defy Led?
Temple of Armok?

depends on how fatalistic you want to be. but itd be nice to have a one last screw you to the godess of the dead.
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Eric Blank

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Re: FailCannon: Still Alive (somehow) (Succession: Battlefailed II)
« Reply #2159 on: October 06, 2011, 02:19:23 pm »

I agree. I certainly expect the fortress to survive my turn, but now would seem the time to come up with the real megaproject that will scream to the cosmos "We are dwarves, and this is OUR universe to behold."

Well, other than housing all of the dead in one structure rigged to collapse and ruin their peaceful slumber on cue.

HOW IN ARMOK'S NAME DID CATALYST ESCAPE HER CELL!?!?
...She's part of the 'safe house' burrow which includes most of the first underground layer of Failcannon, and somehow a door got unlocked...

Gizogin is trying to kill her, yet she's still conducting a meeting with the diplomats for whatever reason.
« Last Edit: October 06, 2011, 02:37:56 pm by Eric Blank »
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.
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