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[werechicken]

My dwarfs wagon started a few squares away from a shrine devoted to a giant feathered crocodilian titan, with deadly poison. I think the dwarfs lasted about 2 minutes (credit were credit's due one of my miners did kill it before dying from the poison)

[treczoks]

THE SEVEN arrived at the embark destination. I designated a stairway straight down right next to the waggon, and off to work went Urist McMiner with his pick. Expecting him to hit either a cave layer or warm stone, I just entered away the requester that said "Raw adamantinek, praise the miners", and the FUN started.
Oh my luck. Missing all three cave layers and hitting a circus tent pole on the first dig.

[AfroScotsDwarf]

Oh deer.
Deer manage to be an even greater nuisance to me than elephants (in their own biomes, that is). A deer managed to slip inside one of my fortresses and into my magma industry halls once and stalled all production for a season or more. Also managed to wound some dwarves when they bumped into it. An elephant slipped into another fort, and ran away to a long backup tunnel (instead of goring everyone once cornered, as I expected).

I read your deer, and I raise you llamas.
I've had goblin thieves less dangerous than them.

I'll call your llama and raise you walruses. Yes, mother ****ing walruses stormed in through my well room, fatally gored my expedition leader, and danced off into the frosty tundra to sing happy walrus songs about oysters.

i laughed my vocal chords to  near on destruction. i thank you, sirs, this is going in my sig
edit: curse you, signature limit!

[wanzerm23]

My first fortress:  Abandoned around a minute in, saying, "I don't know what's going on!"

My fourth fortress:  Embarked on a haunted forest.  Undead harpies kill 4, my woodcutter takes an axe to the rest. 

[Chagen46]

I embarked on a Terrifying biome, and was beset rather quickly by Giant Thrips Zombies. They chased my dwarves around and made it impossible to do anything so I just had to wait till my dwarves starved/died.

I decided to reclaim with 7 axedwarves (all were proficient in Axes and Fighting) and 7 copper battle axes. When I got there, the thrips were there, along with a giant grasshopper zombie. I told the axedwarves to equip the axes and take the grasshopper on.

So, in typical dwarven stupidity idiocy logic, they didn't equip the axes and tried wrestling it. You can guess how that went.

[Graknorke]

On my first fortress I'd put in about a season's work and wanted to save+quit.
I couldn't see the option and assumed it was abandon, being where quit is on the title page.

My smarts are unmatched.

[Binary Toast]

T'was way back when I was still learning the finer points in play, I had just started a new fortress. It was a river canyon, with a fair number of trees I recall. I forget why, but I wanted my enterance to be down towards the river, so I told my miners to start digging, and my woodcutter to start chopping.
Moments later, the alligator had killed two miners, and chased the third into the tunnel he was digging.
With four dwarves, one axe between them, and an alligator sitting on my picks... abandon seemed a good choice.

[BoredVirulence]

I did some slight modding, and I embarked in a terrifying forest. Hoping to bring the fight to the undead, I embarked with 90 peasants, and have a few custom reactions to create slade warhammers, and candy swords.

I unpasue and the rain causes such severe blistering that after 2 minutes all 90 dwarves die of suffocation.
I've never seen so much death so fast.

[automaticsquid]

first time trying to deal with the new evil rains and such gave me a rain of filth that knocked Dwarves out. first rain started almost immediately after unpausing after which a lone zombie rattlesnake went around and killed each one in its own time. so i guess not super fast in terms of time but still they all died before i got a chance to take basically any action.

[Tibbz2]

Don't think I've ever got past the first year with any of my 50-odd forts :/

[Theonefreerunner]

I once embarked in a scorching biome, not much happened. Miners managed to carve a nice entrance hall before everything melted. Dwarf goo everywhere. The re-embark team managed to carve a little more before melting. Time for another re-embark!

[Doughnut189]

I embarked on a frozen volcano.  It was so cold that the supplies and wagon I brought were instantly destroyed by the cold. ALL OF THE SUPPLIES.

I made my miner dig into the side of the volcano and had everyone go inside for warmth (Though about two froze to death outside)

With no food or water and no source of either, my dwarves withered away in the cave, dying off one-by-one...

[DarkWolfXV]

Evil embark
Zombie Sea Serpent
You know the rest of story

[FalseDead]

Spawned in a Terrifying jungle.


First thing I notice is that half my dwarfs are Musk thralls...... Including all the miners and the one woodcutter

I hadn't even unpaused yet.....

The reclaim was worse....

[stven275]

I once embarked with a clear goal in mind, get to the circus as fast as possible.

Yeah that "Fort" was pretty short lived.