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Author Topic: Terrible Jokes  (Read 449982 times)

Iduno

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4395 on: January 15, 2020, 01:08:14 pm »

This hurts me. This hurts me deep down.

Punning on 2 words at once is pretty masterful.

That's like the one about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac, who used to lie awake at night wondering whether there really is a dog.

Yes, but also opposites. One is describing what those words mean, and one is using irony (the words not having the expected literal meaning).
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No live organism can continue for long to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality

Kagus

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4396 on: January 17, 2020, 06:20:26 am »

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Discus.

Naturegirl1999

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4397 on: January 17, 2020, 06:40:01 am »

The label is blurry when I try to read it, what does it say other than FO Remove the label? I canít read the black print because of the blurryness

King Zultan

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4398 on: January 17, 2020, 06:42:57 am »

Its the kind of Frisbee you don't want to catch.
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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when youíre done?

Bumber

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4399 on: January 17, 2020, 06:58:49 am »

The label is blurry when I try to read it, what does it say other than FO Remove the label? I canít read the black print because of the blurryness

"Before each use make sure landing(?) area is clear of people. Use only for its intended purpose. DO NOT REMOVE THIS LABEL"
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Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. Was this inevitable (Y/y)?

Naturegirl1999

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4400 on: January 17, 2020, 07:13:20 am »

The label is blurry when I try to read it, what does it say other than FO Remove the label? I canít read the black print because of the blurryness

"Before each use make sure landing(?) area is clear of people. Use only for its intended purpose. DO NOT REMOVE THIS LABEL"
Thanks

King Zultan

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4401 on: January 17, 2020, 07:30:47 am »

Its like they don't want them to be thrown at people.
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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when youíre done?

Iduno

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4402 on: January 17, 2020, 03:34:22 pm »

Its like they don't want them to be thrown at people.

Then don't give them to Philadelphia fans.
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No live organism can continue for long to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality

Reelya

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4403 on: January 18, 2020, 01:37:13 am »

This hurts me. This hurts me deep down.

Punning on 2 words at once is pretty masterful.

That's like the one about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac, who used to lie awake at night wondering whether there really is a dog.

Yes, but also opposites. One is describing what those words mean, and one is using irony (the words not having the expected literal meaning).

That type of irony also exists in the example I gave. Dyslexia means an issue with spelling, but the example is applying that to concepts themselves.

hector13

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4404 on: January 21, 2020, 08:29:53 pm »

I listen to a podcast so which has some terrible jokes.

Here is a selection.

I went to the doctor with a lettuce up my arse.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Why do you never see elephants hiding up trees?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Iíve heard crocodiles can grow up to fifteen feet.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

My friend goes to school with two bags.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I went to the video shop and asked if I could borrow Batman forever.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I went to the shop and asked if I could buy a kettle.

Kenwood, they said.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Iduno

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4405 on: Today at 09:03:44 am »

Some good'uns, hector.

You might like early Dinosaur Comics, which were a lot of puns and philosophy jokes. Today's ain't bad, either.
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hector13

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4406 on: Today at 08:28:38 pm »

I enjoy it.
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Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.
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