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Author Topic: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O  (Read 13004737 times)

dragdeler

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147900 on: October 15, 2019, 05:39:53 am »

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« Last Edit: November 21, 2020, 11:15:30 am by dragdeler »
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scriver

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147901 on: October 15, 2019, 05:57:05 am »

Fun fact: Santa, in Swedish tradition, is just "The Elf" (or rather "The Gnome", as Swedish doesn't use the cognate of elf for house spirits like English do). He doesn't let us know his name, because names have power.

I think part of the problem with Rudolph is that some of the souls went to power his nose light making his soul farts weaker, reducing the sleigh thrust to weight ratio.  But the stop motion cartoon never explains that.  Otherwise why ostracize the one with the built in headlight?  I imagine santa would be paring him with all the female deer then and he'd have his own personal deer harem.

It wasn't Santa who ostracized Rudolf, though, it was the other reindeers. Rudolf was just a NEET who had to literally be dragged out of his mum's boxstall by the employment offices as rednosyness does not make you viable for sick retirement.


Have you tried just pressing on the screen? I have no idea if this would work, but it might.

Yes! Unfortunately it did nothing.


I work with computer repair, quick question, Are they see through or is it black inside them?
See through: Remove glass panel and clean with alcohol on a paper.
Black: time to replace display

They are see through. But it's a laptop. The screen is not apartpickaple. Removing it will BREAK THE SCREEN ;)
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wierd

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147902 on: October 15, 2019, 06:22:37 am »

Otherwise why ostracize the one with the built in headlight?
The same reason you don't carry a burning torch in front of you when going through a dark hallway: night blindness. Even if Rudolph is opaque, the first time the sled turns or he throws back his head in a creepy stop-motion laugh after a saccharine quip about acceptance, Santa's going to lose night vision while piloting his sled of judgment at ludicrously unsafe speeds; before you can say "Ho Ho Hoooh Scheiβe", the reindeer, sleigh, presents, and Santa will have either plowed into the ground hard enough to become Christmas plasma or just careened off into space.

Put him in a parabolically reflective cone of shame. Problem solved. No light paths can reach the driver, and it increases the efficiency of the light source as well.
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Trekkin

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147903 on: October 15, 2019, 11:40:51 am »

-snip before the quote pyramids break-
Put him in a parabolically reflective cone of shame. Problem solved. No light paths can reach the driver, and it increases the efficiency of the light source as well.

While that might work in theory (although you'd probably want a neck brace as well, given how long those reins are), recall that this is a community of sweatshop workers so entrenched in their North Korea-esque program of manual labor and community displays of patriotism that they ran their aspiring dentist out of town on a rail, and their idea of quality control is apparently to just sweep their sapient production errors under the rug until someone smuggles them to the Island of Misfit Toys without Santa's knowledge and pretend like they didn't somehow make a doll with depression.

What are the odds that, if there was an elf with an interest in optics sufficient to design such a reflector, he or she was not immediately burned at the stake for being a witch?
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Frumple

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147904 on: October 15, 2019, 12:18:48 pm »

I mean, more than that, a cone of shame is like the antithesis of aerodynamic. Stuff don't fly forward well with one of those things on. If it didn't come off or somethin' it'd probably snap red's neck like a twig.
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Arx

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147905 on: October 15, 2019, 12:38:00 pm »

I mean, more than that, a cone of shame is like the antithesis of aerodynamic. Stuff don't fly forward well with one of those things on. If it didn't come off or somethin' it'd probably snap red's neck like a twig.

This problem can be solved by putting a tempered glass front on it. Of course, he'll need to breathe, so we can get an air scoop under his chin and an outlet between the horns. Then you can even put a paper squeaker on it in traffic!
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Dunamisdeos

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147906 on: October 15, 2019, 12:54:22 pm »

Can Santa fly into space? Is that a thing?
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Lord Shonus

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147907 on: October 15, 2019, 01:18:59 pm »

Of course it is. He flies to the sun to meet with the other Santas of the solar system. Who doesn't know that?




((Not wholly joking here - this is the literal premise of a short story in a Christmas collection I read as a kid, no idea of the author, or date (although it has to be post-1950 because they use "8 atomic reindeer" to get there) and I can't even find the collection it was in.))
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overseer05-15

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147908 on: October 15, 2019, 02:00:49 pm »

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Dunamisdeos

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147909 on: October 15, 2019, 02:02:26 pm »

What.

Are there presents to be delivered on Mercury?

Are the other Santas also tubby bearded humans??

If not, are they tubby and bearded aliens?? Not much could survive on most of those planets, is there a Santa that is basically a tardigrade but bearded and jolly? Please take this opportunity to imagine the hellish cacophony that a ho-ho-ho'ing human-sized tardigrade could make. Merry Christmas.
« Last Edit: October 15, 2019, 02:20:35 pm by Dunamisdeos »
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Naturegirl1999

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147910 on: October 15, 2019, 02:05:16 pm »

I love how we are discussing Santa and it's not even November yet
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Dunamisdeos

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147911 on: October 15, 2019, 02:07:38 pm »

Look if Santa Gorn is showing up on my roof come December 25th I need buy a gun like now ok.
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FACT I: Post note art is best art.
FACT II: Dunamisdeos is a forum-certified wordsmith.
FACT III: "All life begins with Post-it notes and ends with Post-it notes. This is the truth! This is my belief!...At least for now."
FACT IV: SPEECHO THE TRUSTWORM IS YOUR FRIEND or BEHOLD: THE FRUIT ENGINE 3.0

Naturegirl1999

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147912 on: October 15, 2019, 02:14:36 pm »

What.

Are there presents to be delivered on Mercury?

Are the other Santas also tubby bearded humans??

If not, are they tubby and bearded aliens??? Not much could survive on most of those planets, is there a Santa that is basically a tardigrade but bearded and jolly? Please take this opportunity to imagine the hellish cacophony that a ho-ho-ho'ing human-sized tardigrade could make. Merry Christmas.
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Dunamisdeos

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147913 on: October 15, 2019, 02:40:16 pm »

The concept of an extremophile non-humanoid Santa figure is apparently common holiday subject matter in 2019.

Naturegirl's is clearly superior. It was made with care.

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FACT I: Post note art is best art.
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FACT III: "All life begins with Post-it notes and ends with Post-it notes. This is the truth! This is my belief!...At least for now."
FACT IV: SPEECHO THE TRUSTWORM IS YOUR FRIEND or BEHOLD: THE FRUIT ENGINE 3.0

scriver

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #147914 on: October 15, 2019, 02:48:43 pm »

What.

Are there presents to be delivered on Mercury?

Are the other Santas also tubby bearded humans??

If not, are they tubby and bearded aliens??? Not much could survive on most of those planets, is there a Santa that is basically a tardigrade but bearded and jolly? Please take this opportunity to imagine the hellish cacophony that a ho-ho-ho'ing human-sized tardigrade could make. Merry Christmas.


Well I just found my christmas avatar
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