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Author Topic: Most Anticlimatic Battles Ever  (Read 50403 times)

misko27

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  • Lawful Neutral; Prophet of Pestilence
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Re: Most Anticlimatic Battles Ever
« Reply #165 on: October 22, 2013, 09:09:05 pm »

Giant attack. I assemble my fledgling military, they look on 1 lvl down a incline (Which i had removed the ramps from, so more a cliff),\ as the Giant charges forward. A unarmed marksdwarf was stranded up there, and as soon as the Giant got into range she charged at him and punched his foot. At this point, a bolt flies out from the assembled mass of soldiers that chips the bone of the giant. Another shoots out, and the giant falls over, the tiny pieces of metal making him pass out. Then the unarmed marksdwarf just continually beat against his head trying to kill him, I imagine looking like a 3 yr old attacking a adult, until a speardwarf arrives and ends the giant with a single stab to the brain. The Giant didn't get off even 1 attack.
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The Age of Man is over. It is the Fire's turn now

Matoro

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Re: Most Anticlimatic Battles Ever
« Reply #166 on: October 23, 2013, 12:21:31 am »

Once I had a dragon one-shotted by a speardwarf. He just casually stabbed a dragon in the head with iron spear, breaking the brain.

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CaptainLambcake

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Re: Most Anticlimatic Battles Ever
« Reply #167 on: October 23, 2013, 02:07:50 pm »

The forgotten beast Bronzespider McFleshEatingBlood has arrived!

Send the whole military out, an axedwarf lops off a toe to create a spray of blood that sends almost the entire military to the hospital with fingers and toes and feet and eyeballs rotting out of their sockets left right and center.

The beast follows them inside, I lock a door, it tries another path--and walks right into a cage trap.
forgotten beasts are trapavoid though
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You wake up in (suddenly) your room not somewhere Armok knows where. Travels in deserts and goblin forests turned up to be a dreams borned by procreation of your autistic imagination.

EvilBob22

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Re: Most Anticlimatic Battles Ever
« Reply #168 on: October 23, 2013, 06:34:32 pm »

Recently had a whole 16-goblin siege killed by 4 stray cats... O_O
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I will run the experiment to completion anyway, however. Even if the only reason why there is a punctured equilibrium in the fortress is because I have been brutally butchering babies
EDIT: I just remembered that dwarves can't equip halberds. That might explain why the squads that use them always die.

Aslandus

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Re: Most Anticlimatic Battles Ever
« Reply #169 on: November 02, 2013, 11:57:06 pm »

A giant flying shrimp that spews dust that insta-kills dwarfs charges past my undefended hallway, kills about 10 civilians... then gets one-shot by a crossbow dwarf... the best part, there's still ichor from it on the floors of my fortress...
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