Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  
Pages: 1 2 [3]

Author Topic: Dwarves and Beards  (Read 2982 times)

Jude

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Dwarves and Beards
« Reply #30 on: October 07, 2009, 06:58:09 pm »

Wouldn't beards be massive fire hazards, though?

That could be a reason why working dwarves tend to keep their beards fairly short, along with them getting trapped in things. Floor-sweeping beards could be a sign of nobility.

I like this.

Quote
Your all missing a very important key factor about beards. They can be used to put a baby into! How else  do you think a raging dwarven mother would carry a baby into battle while also wielding a warhammer and shield? She put the kid in her beard.

It's equally effective when Dad has to watch the baby.
I REALLY like this.
Logged
Quote from: Raphite1
I once started with a dwarf that was "belarded by great hanging sacks of fat."

Oh Jesus

LegoLord

  • Bay Watcher
  • Can you see it now?
    • View Profile
Re: Dwarves and Beards
« Reply #31 on: October 07, 2009, 08:25:47 pm »

I didn't think hair was terribly flammable, that it would burn, but not too readily.
Logged
"Oh look there is a dragon my clothes might burn let me take them off and only wear steel plate."
And this is how tinned food was invented.
Alternately: The Brick Testament. It's a really fun look at what the bible would look like if interpreted literally. With Legos.
Just so I remember

Sensei

  • Bay Watcher
  • Haven't tried coffee crisps.
    • View Profile
Re: Dwarves and Beards
« Reply #32 on: October 07, 2009, 09:17:11 pm »

Yes, hair is terribly flammable. It's a bunch of tinder spaced out by air. Doubly so if it's greasy, and there's crud in it.
Logged
Arms Race Forum Game!  Design weapons and defeat the Spacebattles forum!
The Bay 12 Discord Join now! Voice/text chat and play games with other Bay12'ers!
Add me on Steam: [DFC] Sensei

Jude

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Dwarves and Beards
« Reply #33 on: October 07, 2009, 10:18:49 pm »

I'd go so far as to say blacksmiths and similar generally either trim their beards, or have them well tied up while working the forges.
Logged
Quote from: Raphite1
I once started with a dwarf that was "belarded by great hanging sacks of fat."

Oh Jesus

Sensei

  • Bay Watcher
  • Haven't tried coffee crisps.
    • View Profile
Re: Dwarves and Beards
« Reply #34 on: October 07, 2009, 10:56:30 pm »

Or, they put asbestos on them. That wouldn't be weird, seeing as their geological knowledge is incredibly advanced yet their medical knowledge amounts entirely to "give them water and hope" (although splints, sutures and stitches are being implemented in the next version).
Logged
Arms Race Forum Game!  Design weapons and defeat the Spacebattles forum!
The Bay 12 Discord Join now! Voice/text chat and play games with other Bay12'ers!
Add me on Steam: [DFC] Sensei

shadowclasper

  • Bay Watcher
  • Urist McSpacemarine, AxeDwarf
    • View Profile
    • My Portfolio
Re: Dwarves and Beards
« Reply #35 on: October 07, 2009, 11:18:21 pm »

Speaking on that, Elves probably have better immune systems than dwarves and humans. Not because of some magical immunity, BUT BECAUSE THEY NEVER USE SOAP! After all, that would involve killing trees! O_O
Logged
Project Manager for Towergirls: Subtitle Pending

AbacusWizard

  • Bay Watcher
  • Trust me; I'm a mathematician.
    • View Profile
Re: Dwarves and Beards
« Reply #36 on: October 07, 2009, 11:40:07 pm »

Dunno about naturally short- remember, humans can grow their beards dwarvishly long too. Only it's customary to cut them off. Imagine if you never shaved in your entire life.

Sadly, my beard doesn't get that long. I give it a slight trim occasionally to square it off when it's gotten scraggly (and remove split ends), but I haven't been clean-shaven since I worked at a fast food restaurant seven years ago. It seems to get long enough to reach the bottom of my neck (or upper chest if pulled straight; it's very crinkly) and that's about it. See picture.

I'm mostly Welsh and Germanic in ancestry if that helps with the evolutionary analysis.

Speaking of evolution, I should point out that it is INCREDIBLY slow, and unless dwarves have been tool-users for millions of years, I doubt we'd see any hereditary physical adaptation to working in the forge or down the mine. If you want an evolutionary reason for the dwarven beard, it'll have to be something in their distant past when they were wild creatures.

On the other hand, this is Kansas high fantasy. You can just say "a god did it" and not have to worry about evolution at all!
Logged

Itnetlolor

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
    • Steam ID
Re: Dwarves and Beards
« Reply #37 on: October 08, 2009, 01:45:06 am »

Oh man, my workplace apparently seems to have an issue with my beard. So I was presented with a choice: wear something to cover it up (like a hairnet or something), or shave it off.

I have pride dammit, I'd rather keep my beard, even if I must look silly. Now, where's the nearest magma pipe?

Tack

  • Bay Watcher
  • Celebrating one decade of existential crisis.
    • View Profile
Re: Dwarves and Beards
« Reply #38 on: October 08, 2009, 04:33:22 am »

The smiths do a "Pikel Bouldershoulder"

EDIT: Pardons to those without a knowledge of who the hell Pikel is. Inside jokes suck.
He braids his beard into his hair so that it falls down his back.
« Last Edit: October 08, 2009, 06:28:33 am by Tack »
Logged
Sentience, Endurance, and Thumbs: The Trifector of a Superpredator.
Yeah, he's a banned spammer. Normally we'd delete this thread too, but people were having too much fun with it by the time we got here.
Bay 12 Blood Bowl I apparently host now.

Sabre_Justice

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Dwarves and Beards
« Reply #39 on: October 08, 2009, 05:59:20 am »

The question should be, why do beards need that fleshy shell?
Logged

GlyphGryph

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Dwarves and Beards
« Reply #40 on: October 08, 2009, 10:00:37 am »

Bah, I made a huge post about the evolution of beards in humans and their cultural history and so on and accidently on purpose closed the window! (My boss walked in)

So now it is gone.

I will summarize:
Beards are a classic sign of strength and virility. This is cross-culture; every primitive culture, pretty much, had the same belief, which is a sign that we are evolutionarily geared to see things that way. Of course, humans are sexually dimorphic, since we tend to have semi-pair bonds and a naturally promiscuis nature, normally in a male dominated situation - and what with beards being linked to testosterone, women generally dont get them. In fact, being linked to testosterone is probably what made them associated with attractiveness - There is an actual correlation between strong agressive males and large healthy beards. Since males historically competed over females, rather than vice versa, beards were selected for in males and not in females (females want to appear not to be a challenge). Actually, though, humans are pretty complicated - in addition to our balance of harem relationships and semi-pair-bonds, we also have promiscuis females who bank on fathers taking care of social offspring. Its complicated, but the important thing to keep in mind is that its not even, either in the goal or approach.

Now, men have more beards because testosterone causes beards, but nothing says it has to be this way - Hyena females are the dominant creatures in hyena culture, and have their own special female testosterone to give them special characteristics. So clearly the social aspect is important.

Dwarven culture is clearly different from both situations - they dont do harems, they don't sleep around, they do permanent pair bonding. Most species with permanent pair bonds are remarkably difficult to distinguish between the male and the female. In addition, they seem to be a society where males and females fill the same social and professional roles, further reducing dimorphism (though in the case of beards, the sexual inequality is really the only one that matters). So unless dwarven mating procedure is drastically overhauled, there should be little sexual dimorphism between the specias.

In addition
So, It cam pretty much be assumed that the dwarfs emerged from the colder climes much like their Norse spiritual sires, for insulation (though desert living is possible for the same reason), which can also be attested to by a dwarfs thick frame (which doesn't bode so well for the desert dwelling theory).
seems to be a pretty good summary of their likely origins, but it must be mentioned if they are naturally inclined to mountaintop areas, the cold northern climes aren't required - mountains themselves get pretty cold.

Anyways, this is a lot less in depth than i wanted, but im just not really up for rewriting the whole thing.

Final note, if you want to blame someone for the lack of beards seen today, blame Alexander of Macedonia. He decided to shave the military to increase uniformity (and rob enemies of handhelds). When he marched around, that meant the most impressive people physically tended to be beardless, which sent a lot of cultural messages. Rome decided the style was hot and did the same with its soldiers (and its upper class) because they style all their good ideas from other people. Plus being bearded was a greek thing at the time, and they were trying to assert how totally not a copy of Greece they were.
Logged

Areyar

  • Bay Watcher
  • Ecstatic about recieving his own E:4 mug recently
    • View Profile
Re: Dwarves and Beards
« Reply #41 on: October 08, 2009, 07:07:14 pm »

because dwarven males DO like beards. (also on their women)
Logged
My images bucket for WIPs and such: link
Pages: 1 2 [3]