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[Fniff]

Basically, you are a hero in a movie called Zombie Escape 2, the long awaited sequel to Zombie Escape: Escape From Undead City, a B-movie. This one is too, but is far more silly and funny then the original, which was a hell of a lot more dark. You have to escape from a bunch of zombies in a country setting. Are you a bad enough dude to escape the zombies and win?

This is a sideline project for Scavenger Tale, which is in my signature.

Brief explanation of the rules: Have you ever played a text adventure? This is kinda like that. You issue a command, and I try to fit it with all the other people's commands. These type of games usually have three outcomes: Everything goes insane, the thread dies and/or it becomes amazingly epic. If you attack someone, I go onto random.org and set the true random number generator from 10 to 1. 1 means you fail spectacularly, 10 means you do it like you are in a B-movie zombie flick (Which you are.). If you do anything really B-movish (For example, you jam a fork into a zombie's eye and you are sprayed with an amazing amount of blood), you gain one B point. If you wanna, you can post this on your signature.

Code: [Select]

I (Insert way you suggested the way the zombie should be killed) in Zombie Escape 2.
Oh, and there is no Zombie Escape 1. It's kinda like Evil Dead, everyone kinda...Forgot it because the sequel was too awesome to ignore.
*

The car splutters, and dies. Dammit, when you just thought you had escaped. You get out and kick the car, then pop the hood. A bunch of smoke causes you to recoil.

"Fuck!" You kick the car again, hurting your foot. You hold it for a while, and then let go.

You find your trusty bloodstained baseball bat and wonder what you should do next.

Your B-weapon: Bat. Uses left: 5.

[quip]

Rig car to explode and walk away as the car explodes.
You know you want to.

[Burnt Pies]

Yes. Framed in an explosion in the first minute of the movie? Sets the awesome bar high for the rest of it.

[Fniff]

Rig car to explode and walk away as the car explodes.
You know you want to.

Thankfully, you have a keg of dynamite left from when you were killing zombies about an hour ago.

You rig it up with the car, and walk away.

It explodes in a glorious air of explosiony. Well, that was fun. Totally useless, though.

[Burnt Pies]

Search nearby woods for a hunter's cabin. There's always one out in the woods.

[Fniff]

Yes. Framed in an explosion in the first minute of the movie? Sets the awesome bar high for the rest of it.

The sane part of the audience goes "What the hell was the point of that?" while the B-movie fans go "Oh dear Jesus this is gonna be such a good movie."

Search nearby woods for a hunter's cabin. There's always one out in the woods.

You decide to check the forest, to see if there is anything.

You find a cabin. You go in.

"Motherfucker!" Is the last word you hear before a very hard metal pipe hits you in the head.

You wake up a few minutes later. A girl with eyeliner and a very exposing shirt is holding a long metal pipe at your neck.

"Breath, fucker." She says.

"I'd try, but you are such a bitch I won't give you the satisfaction." That earns you a very nasty slap.

"Let's cease the pleasantries. Who are you and what are you doing in Tucker's Creek?" You manage to remember why are you here (You just escaped from Monroeville and also killed 2,395 zombies on the way, but you kinda forget your name...What was it?

[Burnt Pies]

"I'm Mike Davies, and I just killed 2,395 zombies while escaping from Monroeville. I'm kind of a big deal."

I look into the camera with my best hero face on.

[quip]

'Ted McBadass, Awesome Zombie Killing is my middle name'

Yup, Ted Awesome Zombie Killing McBadass, unless someone comes up with another one.
Anyway, ask her if there's any zombie infected towns nearby for us to avoid escape through.

Curse you Burnt Pies and your NINJA skills!
I'll go with Mike Davies.

[Fniff]

"I'm Mike Davies, and I just killed 2,395 zombies while escaping from Monroeville. I'm kind of a big deal."

I look into the camera with my best hero face on.

"Hmm. I heard some guy killed a bunch of zombies while escaping from a rengade part of the military on the highway. Guess you are him." The girl smirks. "My name is Amber. Amber Dawkins, I am not from around here. I lived up in New York until my dad wanted to go on a nature trip. He got infected by our dog."

'Ted McBadass, Awesome Zombie Killing is my middle name'

Yup, Ted Awesome Zombie Killing McBadass, unless someone comes up with another one.
Anyway, ask her if there's any zombie infected towns nearby for us to avoid escape through.

Curse you Burnt Pies and your NINJA skills!
I'll go with Mike Davies.

"Hey, any towns where we can find a car or something? My one mistakenly exploded." Amber look at you with a mystified face, then she snaps out of it.

"Well, there is a town up the road called Ike's Bayou, we could go there, but zombies clogged up the roads to it. We have to go through the bayou." She looks around with an air of 'Going to the Bayou is a bad idea.' while a musical sting accompanies her.

[quip]

'Well then. It's time to nut up and shut up (obvious plagrism), lets get going.'
Anyway, cue arming up seen involving various garden implements which will mysteriously be carried around by us as Chekovs guns

[Fniff]

'Well then. It's time to nut up and shut up (obvious plagrism), lets get going.'
Anyway, cue arming up seen involving various garden implements which will mysteriously be carried around by us as Chekovs guns

Warning: You can only have one chekhov's gun, or replace your B-movie weapon. Replace B weapon or get one garden implement?

[quip]

Very well, the B Movie gun shall be our Chekovs gun, still head on down to Ike's Bayou on foot, leaving time for some brief plot and vistas of the zombie filled city making it clear that it's impossible that two people could possibly make it through on foot.

[Fniff]

Very well, the B Movie gun shall be our Chekovs gun, still head on down to Ike's Bayou on foot, leaving time for some brief plot and vistas of the zombie filled city making it clear that it's impossible that two people could possibly make it through on foot.

B-movie weapon: Spade. Uses left: 12.
Chekhov's Gun: Baseball Bat.

You get ready for a fight through the Bayou.

"So, let me ask you a question. I traveled with five people armed with assault rifles through the zombie infested Monroeville, and after that there was only me left. How would we fair if that same team was in the Bayou?" You say.

"Well, discounting the zombies, you'd all be eaten by alligators in the first 20 minutes." Amber says, after thinking a bit.

[quip]

'So it'll be a cake walk?'

[Fniff]

'So it'll be a cake walk?'

"If the cake had spikes in it, had an icing of acid and the base was made from flames...Yeah. It would." She says, sarcastically.