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Author Topic: Dwarf Fortress Jokes  (Read 17175 times)

Aramco

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Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« on: February 15, 2011, 02:43:30 pm »
So, just list some DF jokes. Y'know, the kind that only a DF player would get.

Alright, I have one to start off with.

What do you call a Hoary Marmot who is in the army?

...

A WARry Marmot! Get it? Alright, maybe that wasn't the best, but you get the idea.
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Quote from: G-Flex on May 29, 2012, 10:34:19 pm
Or maybe there's a god who's just completely insane and sends you to Detroit, Michigan in a new body if you ever utter the name "Pat Sajak".

rarborman

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #1 on: February 15, 2011, 02:59:41 pm »
What did the dwarf give the elfin trader for a gift?        MAGMA!
Why did the dwarf cross the road?                             Because there was a sock on the other side.
How many cats does it take to lag a fortress.              2cat
A picture of dwarves fighting demons, Urist Haratio puts on sunglasses, "I guess we... dug too deep"   YYYEEEAAAAHHHH
What does a elf call a dead dwarf?                            Yummy!
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"But to that second circle of sad hell, Where ‘mid the gust, the whirlwind, and the flaw Of rain and hail-stones, lovers need not tell Their sorrows. Pale were the sweet lips I saw, Pale were the lips I kiss’d, and fair the form I floated with, about that melancholy storm."

G-Flex

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #2 on: February 15, 2011, 03:04:43 pm »
I don't think I can palm my face as quickly as necessary here. I'm going to have to invent some kind of hydraulic facepalming mask to keep up.
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Aramco

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #3 on: February 15, 2011, 03:07:50 pm »
Quote from: G-Flex on February 15, 2011, 03:04:43 pm
I don't think I can palm my face as quickly as necessary here. I'm going to have to invent some kind of hydraulic facepalming mask to keep up.

That's what I was thinking when I made this thread.

Why did the clown cross the road?

To get the Dwarf on the other side.
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Quote from: G-Flex on May 29, 2012, 10:34:19 pm
Or maybe there's a god who's just completely insane and sends you to Detroit, Michigan in a new body if you ever utter the name "Pat Sajak".

Askot Bokbondeler

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #4 on: February 15, 2011, 03:35:05 pm »
every time you masturbate, you're doing your part to preserve the fps

am i doin it rite? i stopped paying atention to memes since the nineties
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Max White

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #5 on: February 15, 2011, 03:52:23 pm »
Quote from: Askot Bokbondeler on February 15, 2011, 03:35:05 pm
every time you masturbate, you're doing your part to preserve the fps

am i doin it rite? i stopped paying atention to memes since the nineties
urdoinitrite
I know I lol'd.
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MadJax

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #6 on: February 15, 2011, 04:29:28 pm »
In the middle of a three way path is a sock, down one end is a kobold, another is a dwarf with common sense, the last is a goblin who has turned to pacifism. Which one makes it to the sock?

The kobold, the other two don't exist!
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Dwarven Math:

Dorf + Magma + Insane Project = SCIENCE!

RenoFox

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #7 on: February 15, 2011, 05:06:54 pm »
Dwarf: Greetings elves! Stand still while we lower the drawbridge!
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Ultimuh

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #8 on: February 15, 2011, 05:10:23 pm »
According to the noble dwarf, magma is aperantly not always the solution.
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inteuniso

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #9 on: February 15, 2011, 08:38:28 pm »
Kids tend to have a lot of Fun.
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Quote from: sonerohi on October 03, 2010, 05:04:38 pm
Lol scratch that I'm building a marijuana factory.

Max White

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #10 on: February 15, 2011, 10:30:23 pm »
Yo mommas so fat, she takes up four squairs.
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Ultimuh

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #11 on: February 15, 2011, 10:32:26 pm »
Quote from: Max White on February 15, 2011, 10:30:23 pm
Yo mommas so fat, she takes up four squairs.

Ok, That one was quite funny, tough I usually think 'yo momma' jokes are kinda lame.
But I could not help but chuckle at this one.  :D
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rarborman

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #12 on: February 15, 2011, 10:54:43 pm »
Yo mommas so, big, she has her own z level.
In dwarf fortress you magma the elves, in solviet fortress the elves magma you!
Your mommas so big, she causes massive fps drops when she moves.
What do you call a glass forgotten beast with [BUILDING_DESTROYER:1], The Kool aid man, OH YEAH!
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"But to that second circle of sad hell, Where ‘mid the gust, the whirlwind, and the flaw Of rain and hail-stones, lovers need not tell Their sorrows. Pale were the sweet lips I saw, Pale were the lips I kiss’d, and fair the form I floated with, about that melancholy storm."

Gatleos

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #13 on: February 16, 2011, 06:12:41 am »
Quote from: rarborman on February 15, 2011, 10:54:43 pm
Yo mommas so, big, she has her own z level.
Now my face hurts. If it's from laughing or repeated contact with my palm is for you to decide.
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Quote from: shadowform on August 29, 2010, 03:05:49 pm
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Max White

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Re: Dwarf Fortress Jokes
« Reply #14 on: February 16, 2011, 06:16:41 am »
Yo mommas so fat, if her raws she has [BODY_SIZE:HELL_NO]
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