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Author Topic: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...  (Read 13721 times)

Itnetlolor

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #15 on: April 05, 2011, 11:06:37 pm »

DUNGEON MASTER

- everyone would be thrilled when I show up, which is more than you can say for other nobles and migrants
- I would get to chill with awesome beasts like giant scorpions and war mandrills
- no assigned labor, just going around forging weapons or taming dragons whenever the mood strikes me
- I would get to run around naked except for a cloak and nobody would dare say a thing
That was also going to be my alternative. I'm a friend to all animals it seems. So I'm a natural dungeon master as well. Dungeon Master Artifact Maker.

Catastrophic lolcats

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #16 on: April 05, 2011, 11:08:23 pm »

High Master Drunk.
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breadbocks

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #17 on: April 06, 2011, 02:06:07 am »

DUNGEON MASTER

- everyone would be thrilled when I show up, which is more than you can say for other nobles and migrants
- I would get to chill with awesome beasts like giant scorpions and war mandrills
- no assigned labor, just going around forging weapons or taming dragons whenever the mood strikes me
- I would get to run around naked except for a cloak and nobody would dare say a thing
Correction: A few dozen cloaks, and every damn pair of gloves in a 2.53 mile radius.
High Master Drunk.
Sorry bud. Somebody beat you to that joke. Try again.
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Clearly, cakes are the next form of human evolution.

Catastrophic lolcats

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #18 on: April 06, 2011, 05:55:17 am »

Sorry bud. Somebody beat you to that joke. Try again.

Joke?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Darvi

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #19 on: April 06, 2011, 06:08:52 am »

Clothier. Imagine the cash I could make with Pig Tail Socks.
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Noble Digger

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #20 on: April 06, 2011, 06:37:36 am »

The Philosopher.

You get all the important benefits of being a noble: you can eat and drink the poor suckers' food, take up space and do no work, and yet miraculously most players AND dwarves are still glad to see you.

Why? Because you don't stick your nose where it doesn't belong and let the real dwarves do the real work the way they really want to.
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quib·ble
1. To evade the truth or importance of an issue by raising trivial distinctions and objections.
2. To find fault or criticize for petty reasons; cavil.

Forumite

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #21 on: April 06, 2011, 06:38:38 am »

Brewer. No fort can ever have too many of them.
I want a brewer too. The brewer gets a direct return on his work, by getting to drink the great booze, low chance of a mood and generally safe within the fortress, they are not as prone to random deaths as other dorfs.
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"The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit." - W. Somerset Maugham

Torgan

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #22 on: April 06, 2011, 07:14:46 am »

Spinner, just so I can twirl round and round all day going wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! and no one can tell me to stop as that's my job.
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rex mortis

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #23 on: April 06, 2011, 07:23:39 am »

I'll be the manager. Since the overseer is too lazy to individually micromanage workshops, I have so much to do with updating work orders, I'll never have to haul socks. Even better, since you guys know what you are supposed to do without me ever talking to anybody, I can become a hermit, safe from tantrum spirals.
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Because death is peaceful and magma is lovely.

de5me7

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #24 on: April 06, 2011, 07:27:49 am »

engraver - engrave depressing images of the past in peoples bedrooms and thus make everyone miserable
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ahonek

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #25 on: April 06, 2011, 07:59:45 am »

The Hammerer.
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Jurph

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #26 on: April 06, 2011, 08:08:36 am »

Legendary Mechanic.
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Dreambrother has my original hammer-shaped Great Hall.  Towerweak has taken the idea to the next level.

MrOassis

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #27 on: April 06, 2011, 08:18:31 am »

Chief Medical Dwarf

You know, the kind that actually Diagnoses patients! Plus, dwarves would respect me for saving their husband/wife/son/ best friends who is the fort's best combattant...

Dutchling

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #28 on: April 06, 2011, 08:37:35 am »

Bone Doctor, I can hurt people as much as I want too without the risk of them fighting back :)
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Johuotar

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Re: If you could have any job in a typical dwarven fortress...
« Reply #29 on: April 06, 2011, 11:34:11 am »

Brewer, smith, dungeon master and smart noble are fine choices.
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