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Author Topic: What Would Urist Do?  (Read 401121 times)

King Zultan

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9015 on: May 12, 2018, 11:20:52 pm »

Strip him of his instrument and put him in the army.

WWUD if he was forced to join the military.
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Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Can I have the sword when you’re done?

fishboyliam

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9016 on: May 14, 2018, 01:24:58 pm »

Probably the same thing all soldiers do; die to some bullshit syndrome from a titan or beast.

WWUD if after decades of development he developed sentience and realized the nature of his reality?
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Jbehler64

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9017 on: May 14, 2018, 02:02:57 pm »

Nothing. He would be limited by his own capacity to act and his environment.
We are all cogs in the machine.
...
He would also get that little red stress arrow.
Then be culled for it by a gamer who didn't want to deal with tantrums.

WWUD if he worked in an office?
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vanatteveldt

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9018 on: May 15, 2018, 02:21:07 pm »

WWUD if he worked in an office?
Nothing. He would be limited by his own capacity to act and his environment.
We are all cogs in the machine.
...
He would also get that little red stress arrow.
Then be culled for it by a gamerboss who didn't want to deal with tantrums.

WWUD if he embarked without a pick?

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fishboyliam

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9019 on: May 15, 2018, 02:43:44 pm »

He would dig with his bare hands. Gotta get underground SOMEHOW.

WWUD if he woke up one day and realized his pet dog had gone missing?
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pikachu17

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9020 on: May 15, 2018, 03:12:05 pm »

Put on a newly-made Dog leather vest.

WWUD if he realized the vest was made from his dog?
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Sigtext!
dwarf 4tress from scratch
The Pikachu revolution!
Thank you NatureGirl19999 for the avatar switcher

A warforged bard named Gender appears and says"Hello. I am a social construct."

PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9021 on: May 15, 2018, 03:23:24 pm »

Get an unhappy thought every time he dons the vest, and spend half of his remaining time remembering every occasion he wore the vest, which will eventually add up into a series of unpleasant memories of putting on said vest that will ultimately drive him to madness.

WWUD if he was forced into an arranged marriage with an elf, in order to maintain peace between the dwarven and elven civs?

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It's actually pretty terrifying to think about having all of your fat melt off into grease because you started sweating too much.

Jbehler64

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9022 on: May 15, 2018, 05:12:17 pm »

Kinky, yet surprisingly pleasant marital interactions.
Think Legolas and Gimli.

WWUD with infinite power and infinite magma?
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Bumber

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9023 on: May 15, 2018, 05:44:46 pm »

Get unjustly blamed for a failed mandate, then flood the offending noble's room with magma. Unfortunately, Urist happened to be the sole engraver of the room, and this makes him very angry. He accidentally beats his beloved pet to death, and is driven to the brink of madness shortly thereafter. Urist looses a roaring laughter, fell and terrible!

WWUD if a deranged dwarf with infinite power and infinite magma set about a mysterious construction in his fort?
« Last Edit: May 15, 2018, 05:55:46 pm by Bumber »
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Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. Was this inevitable (Y/y)?

PlumpHelmetMan

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9024 on: May 15, 2018, 06:14:02 pm »

Say a silent prayer to his deity of worship and feebly cover his head with a shield.

WWUD if his fort was sieged by a goblin civ whose master was a clown...no, not the usual ones, a LITERAL circus clown?
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It's actually pretty terrifying to think about having all of your fat melt off into grease because you started sweating too much.

Eschar

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"Continue struggling, laws of physics be darned."
 - NRDL
"What, are you stupid or something? Every one of the snake's bones is crushed! Its internal organs are torn apart! There is no way you can - (6) You resuscitate the snake."
- Gatleos

UselessMcMiner

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9026 on: May 18, 2018, 09:24:42 am »

Launch a clown car full of magma at the clown and then be reliving the memory of killing the demon until he breaks down 2 years later and turns his wife into a ☼ dwarven leather dress ☼  named Snotshot the Lance of Lust



WWUD If his daughter had a tryst with a goblin.
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Quote
The scouts have been fighting a giant capuchin for the past month now. They still haven't killed it.

Obsidian 1053

The Sentries are still fighting the capuchin. For two monthes they have done nothing but punch this monkey.

fishboyliam

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9027 on: May 18, 2018, 10:20:07 am »

Launch a clown car full of magma at the clown and then be reliving the memory of killing the demon until he breaks down 2 years later and turns his wife into a ☼ dwarven leather dress ☼  named Snotshot the Lance of Lust



WWUD If his daughter had a tryst with a goblin.

What daughter? Urist has no daughter anymore.

WWUD if it turned out that HE was a goblin?
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pikachu17

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9028 on: May 18, 2018, 03:40:57 pm »

Having a tryst with his daughter? Get killed by the Overseer not wanting incest in his fort.

WWUD if she was Donald Trump?
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Sigtext!
dwarf 4tress from scratch
The Pikachu revolution!
Thank you NatureGirl19999 for the avatar switcher

A warforged bard named Gender appears and says"Hello. I am a social construct."

Bumber

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9029 on: May 18, 2018, 11:28:59 pm »

WWUD if she was Donald Trump?
Change her name to Dolek JoinTrumpet.

WWDJT do?
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Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. Was this inevitable (Y/y)?
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