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Author Topic: What Would Urist Do?  (Read 379013 times)

UristMcVampire

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  • [NOT_LIVING][BLOODSUCKER]
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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9120 on: September 30, 2018, 10:57:36 am »

Sell them to elves. Elves get mad because the bins are made of wood. Uh oh...
*gunshot noises*

WWUD if he learns chaos magic?
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 Naga/Lamia race

pikachu17

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9121 on: October 01, 2018, 01:44:40 pm »

Turn into a dolphin and do the Macarena.

WWUD if he had Excalibur?

mightymushroom

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9122 on: October 01, 2018, 02:16:10 pm »

Place the artifact sword on a pedestal, of course.

It then becomes a perpetual quest object for adventurers: "If you can take the sword from the magma-trapped madhouse labyrinth yonder, you can be the next king of the humans." "Eh, I'll pass."

What would Kobold-Urist do if he stole Excalibur?
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Bumber

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9123 on: October 02, 2018, 01:04:54 am »

Order the humans to give him all their x+alpaca wool thongs+x, etc., and return to the caves as kobold of the month. The sword got stolen by a gray langur on the way back, though.

WWUD if attacked by an Excalibur-wielding monkey?
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Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. Was this inevitable (Y/y)?

KittyTac

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9124 on: October 02, 2018, 01:07:56 am »

Disarm and kill the monkey with its own sword.

WWUD with the mangled mutilated monkey corpse?
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Olith McHuman

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9125 on: October 02, 2018, 01:30:51 am »

Overcome by the horror of both seeing a dead creature and not being able to uphold tradition, Urist goes berserk.

WWUD if another Urist was rampaging through the fort with Excalibur?
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Dorsidwarf

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9126 on: October 02, 2018, 06:04:09 pm »

Continue hauling Plump Helmet Roasts until the madman takes a swing at him, then punch him in the eye and explode the brain.

WWUD if he just got served a Plump helmet Roast covered in brain matter?
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UristMcVampire

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9127 on: October 03, 2018, 06:41:54 am »

Eat it. Get killed by prions because someone modded them in.


WWUD if he's somehow a vampire, necromancer, zombie, and werebeast at the same time?
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 Naga/Lamia race

MrSelfDestruct

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9128 on: October 10, 2018, 09:28:24 pm »

Finally rid of every last elf before being accidentally constructing a wall around himself while building his dark tower made of the corpses of the elves.

WWUD if an elven king invited him to taste magical elven wine?
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Strike the Earth!

UristMcVampire

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9129 on: October 11, 2018, 12:04:12 am »

Drink it. Turn into an elf.


WWUD if he was a thread necromancer?
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 Naga/Lamia race

Imic

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9130 on: October 11, 2018, 06:44:13 am »

He will ups become an outcast of the power boards. The upper boards, however...
WWUD if he started another necrothreat?

pikachu17

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9131 on: January 24, 2019, 04:31:27 pm »

Wield a flaming chainsaw.

What Would Urist Do with a grand piano, an anvil, and a safe?

Bortness

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9132 on: January 25, 2019, 10:04:09 am »

Put the safe on top of the grand piano, hang the anvil from the ceiling with a *platinum chain*, swing the anvil to strike the safe which then resonates the grand piano cabinet, as the most efficient Dwarven musical instrument that Urist can conceive of given the available items.

He never does figure out what those long white and black levers on the one edge of the piano are for.

WWUD if a goblin snatcher suddenly showed up in the midst of his anvil-safe-piano improv session?
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King Zultan

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9133 on: January 25, 2019, 10:31:37 am »

Pull the lever and disconnect the *Platinum chain* from the anvil at the very moment that the goblin would be in the anvils flight path.

WWUD it the anvil didn't hit the goblin.
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Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Can I have the sword when you’re done?

Sir Elventide

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Re: What Would Urist Do?
« Reply #9134 on: January 27, 2019, 09:37:36 am »

Watch as it lands on a fellow dwarf then goes into a fell mood and use the corpse to build a sculpture made of cheese.

WWUD if he finds out that he can manipulate reality itself.
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