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Author Topic: Children burrow aka kindergarten  (Read 6936 times)

Noir

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Children burrow aka kindergarten
« on: May 21, 2011, 07:16:30 am »

Is there any (good) reason why children just won't go to their assigned burrow? I just lost a good soldier because they had to wait SO LONG until all the kids left them, and they were too tired when I finally pitted the troll on to play with them. Of course I savescummed back, I cannot stand losing good men for this idiocy.

Why can't I just pick children up and give them a good beating for playing where they are not supposed to be? Most importantly, why they don't obey the burrow they are assigned to?
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Naked dwarves remove the need to produce more clothing, which means more of your pig tails can be brewed into booze.
I think this is less a problem and more an expression of dwarven priorities.

PCpaste

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #1 on: May 21, 2011, 07:21:09 am »

You're the overseer, and you tell them "You're grounded! Stay in your burrow!" and they respond with "And what are you going to do if I don't?"

Honestly, there's not much you can do about it when your avatar, your only connection to the world is a giant flying X that can't actively touch anything.
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Dwarf Fortress: The only game where an Artificial Intelligence-controlled unit can pull the pants off someone and the proceed to beat said someone to death with said pants.

Noir

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #2 on: May 21, 2011, 07:26:21 am »

Then they will enjoy dying at the hands of sparring prisoners, I guess. I couldn't care less.
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Naked dwarves remove the need to produce more clothing, which means more of your pig tails can be brewed into booze.
I think this is less a problem and more an expression of dwarven priorities.

Angry Bob

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #3 on: May 21, 2011, 09:18:00 am »

Create X wall sections in your kindergarten.

Order a mass dumping to occupy all of your adults.

Order the walls deconstructed. Some or all oft the children will go to do so.

Restrain the children however you want.

This method is not by any means foolproof, but should put most of your children in one place long enough to hold them there with a locked door or whatever.
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FUN FOR THE FUN GOD

Sphalerite

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #4 on: May 21, 2011, 09:44:21 am »

Burrows don't restrict where dwarves can go.  Burrows just prevent dwarves from doing any jobs involving items, buildings, or creatures outside the burrow.  Dwarven children don't do much work, so burrows don't have much effect on them.

Back in 40d I built a mechanism using pressure plates to remove children from my fortress's population and divert them to a sealed children's academy where they'd stay until they grew to be adults.  Because of changes to how pressure plates and creature sizes work this isn't possible in the current version.
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Any intelligent fool can make things bigger and more complex... It takes a touch of genius --- and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction.

Musashi

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #5 on: May 21, 2011, 10:07:22 am »

Once again, we could exploit that. The only job children can - and will spontaneoulsy - do is farming. Disable adult farming, or restrict them to specific adult farms in their own, separate burrow. Create farms in a burrow that will be children-only. Use whatever dwarven trick is needed to actually keep them there until adulthood. Heck, maybe you can use children farms efficiently by making them a primary food source for their users, limiting the need to regularly dump them meals.
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I don't mean to alarm you, but it appears that your Dwarves are all in fact elephants.

Angry Bob

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #6 on: May 21, 2011, 10:12:38 am »

They also deconstruct walls.
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FUN FOR THE FUN GOD

Musashi

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #7 on: May 21, 2011, 10:40:32 am »

They also deconstruct walls.
Yes, the only problem with that fact though, is that adults will also do so, and I don't believe deconstructing stuff is linked to a specific job - else, most of my children would be Expert Masons/Architects/Whatever by the time they are 13. Therefore, you can't disable deconstructing.
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I don't mean to alarm you, but it appears that your Dwarves are all in fact elephants.

Aspgren

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #8 on: May 21, 2011, 12:56:25 pm »

Don't forget a channel through the roof of the kindergarten, through which you can dump food.
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The crossbow squad, 'The Bolts of Fleeing' wouldn't even show up.
I have an art blog now.

Icee77

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #9 on: May 21, 2011, 01:01:09 pm »

I wonder if Children will fight elk-birds...... why don't you get rid of the cannot be restrained tag (I think they have it) and chain the children to a wall or prison. They will soon be hardened.
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Musashi

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #10 on: May 21, 2011, 01:11:59 pm »

Actually, it's not so bad an idea. Start throwing them fairly harmless* but aggressive beasts a child can reasonably kill without being (too) gravely injured. Increase dangerousness of creatures. Watch them punching troglodytes to death. Enjoy.




*this game being Dwarf Fortress, you are sole judge of the exact definition of this term. However, please remember this explicitly excludes capybaras, hoofed creatures, all of badgerkind, goblins, hoofed creatures, carps, fluffy wamblers, hoofed creatures, giant cave spiders, jabberers, mooses, and other dwarves.
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I don't mean to alarm you, but it appears that your Dwarves are all in fact elephants.

Noir

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #11 on: May 21, 2011, 01:28:10 pm »

It's ok, I just built a door that I selectively close and open, a-la Maxwell's demon, to keep children out.

This of course didn't stop a soldier mum from entering the arena with her Dwarf Baby. In this very moment, she is merrily fighting a Troll (with her two squadmates) with her training axe in her hand and the little bundle of joy in the other.
As the fight lasted for quite a few (them being steel-clad, and the troll being almost immune to traning axes), she stopped in the middle of the arena to make her baby sleep, while the other two were whacking away at the troll (and losing some teeth as well). After about 700-900 frames, she rejoined the fight.

Dwarven mums are hardcore.
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Naked dwarves remove the need to produce more clothing, which means more of your pig tails can be brewed into booze.
I think this is less a problem and more an expression of dwarven priorities.

foop

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #12 on: May 21, 2011, 02:10:02 pm »

Dwarven mums are hardcore.
Hush little baby, listen to my song,
Mamma's gonna tan you a troll leather thong.
And if that thong don't menace with spikes,
Mamma's gonna kill you whatever you like...
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Andal

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #13 on: May 21, 2011, 02:14:02 pm »

Dwarven mums are hardcore.
Hush little baby, listen to my song,
Mamma's gonna tan you a troll leather thong.
And if that thong don't menace with spikes,
Mamma's gonna kill you whatever you like...

Totally gonna sig this.
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When I was reorganizing my inventory to fit all by books on life and death into various bags and things, I looked at my inventory and saw that I was multigrasping a necromancer slab.  It was pretty hilarious.
I think that would be an excellent way to impart the critical lessons of life and death to the ignorant masses.

vhappylurker

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Re: Children burrow aka kindergarten
« Reply #14 on: May 21, 2011, 02:16:09 pm »

Damn. I just usually use Therapist to make any dwarf spawn into productive members of society, usually masons and miners. Because child labor is the perfect way to keep the kids occupied and out of your military's way.

I'm a horrible, horrible person.
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