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Author Topic: Could someone explain... The thread where we muse over what causes certain wtfs.  (Read 340307 times)

Mura

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Have you ever tried to play an instrument while as drunk as a dwarf?

Why don't dwarves manufacture whips?
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I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

pisskop

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They all play the hammer or axe, and their audience seems to be dying to get away!

Why can't liquid breath attacks target creatures?


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grrr I will concede.  Whips are torture devices, and dwarfs condone no such thing.
« Last Edit: August 04, 2012, 02:10:06 pm by pisskop »
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Pisskop's Reblancing Mod - A C:DDA Mod to make life a little (lot) more brutal!
drealmerz7 - pk was supreme pick for traitor too I think, and because of how it all is and pk is he is just feeding into the trollfucking so well.
PKs DF Mod!

pisskop

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I was not specific enough... Liquid spatter cannot hit creatures, and the ai will not use it to attack...  presumably because toady
 thought it too much like magic otherwise.

I have a caccodemon.  a slow red giant angry ball of flying teeth and chitin.  I want a good alternative for the verb bite that may or may be a single word or imply CAN_LATCH.  So a phrase that implies sticking in your mouth with the purpose of damaging it that may not lead to 'caccodemon1 latches on firmly!'

a caccodemn is my avatar, btw.
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Pisskop's Reblancing Mod - A C:DDA Mod to make life a little (lot) more brutal!
drealmerz7 - pk was supreme pick for traitor too I think, and because of how it all is and pk is he is just feeding into the trollfucking so well.
PKs DF Mod!

Joben

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"The Cacodemon masticates the Doom Marine."

snaps, nips, gnaws?
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Broken Arrow - A small stats tweak to fix unrealistically overpowered arrows and bolts.

My RTD games: Roll To Raptor (On hold), Dino Arena

Komra

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Alternatively, clamps, munches, or chomps.

Why don't dwarven civilians generally have a penchant for headwear beyond hoods?
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But you never see a movie where a terrible coal plant accident causes a horrible devastation, do you? Nope, everyone seems to think that nuclear plants get their energy by smacking live atomic warheads all day or something.

Callista

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They've tried wearing hats and caps and such, but they inevitably fall off during the dwarf's next kegstand. Hoods are tied on and not vulnerable to this problem.

How do kobolds easily sneak past fifty traps set by master mechanics, only to be discovered by a half-trained flea-bitten mutt?
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Corai

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Because we have a undying love for animals, and we simply CANNOT resist hugging them with our knives when we see them.


Why can't my slaves kobolds ever steal anything useful?
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Jacob/Lee: you have a heart made of fluffy
Jeykab/Bee: how the fuck do you live your daily life corai
Jeykab/Bee: you seem like the person who constantly has mini heart attacks because cuuuute

lkjggfs

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Can someone explain how to make it so only certian bolts are used? I was in a siege and markdwarves had no bolts, the hunters had wasted them. So, can someone explain how to make it so only hunter use certian bolts while markdwarves use others?
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Callista

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Can someone explain how to make it so only certian bolts are used? I was in a siege and markdwarves had no bolts, the hunters had wasted them. So, can someone explain how to make it so only hunter use certian bolts while markdwarves use others?
You'll want to put this one in the questions thread. But, short answer: Use the sub-menus in the military screen to assign various numbers of bolts to various groups of dwarves.
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crazysheep

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Because shiny doesn't mean useful, Corai.

Why does handwear seem to come in 2 sizes (gloves, mittens) but footwear only seems to come in one size (socks)?
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"Don't be in such a hurry to grow up, for there's nothing a kid can't do."

pisskop

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foot wraps take too long to put on.  besides, how do you make a footwrap?  'ohh look urist!  you know those bloody pus-filled pants that got too worn to use?  Now you can rub it on your feet; and you dont even have to wash first!'

When something bites through armour and its wearer dies, how come the next scavenger to come along can wear it like its new?  an animal just tried to eat it!
Logged
Pisskop's Reblancing Mod - A C:DDA Mod to make life a little (lot) more brutal!
drealmerz7 - pk was supreme pick for traitor too I think, and because of how it all is and pk is he is just feeding into the trollfucking so well.
PKs DF Mod!

Nyxalinth

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foot wraps take too long to put on.  besides, how do you make a footwrap?  'ohh look urist!  you know those bloody pus-filled pants that got too worn to use?  Now you can rub it on your feet; and you dont even have to wash first!'

When something bites through armour and its wearer dies, how come the next scavenger to come along can wear it like its new?  an animal just tried to eat it!

Because armor is self-repairing.

How does a dwarf in a strange mood build an entire cabinet out of a donkey bone?
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Nyxalinth likes the color blue, gaming, writing, art, cats for their aloofness, DEVO for their ideas and Hannibal Lecter for his genius and sophistication. Whenever possible, she prefers to consume bacon cheeseburgers and pinot noir. She absolutely detests stupid people.

acetech09

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'Twas a huge ass, and a small cabinet.

Why do starving dwarves cancel a harvest plant job to go hunt vermin?
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I challenge you to a game of 'Hide the Sausage', to the death.

crazysheep

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Because plants can't be eaten before they're harvested.. and if they harvested the plants to eat, they would die of hunger first.

Why do dwarves collect XXpig tail fiber socksXX?
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"Don't be in such a hurry to grow up, for there's nothing a kid can't do."

acetech09

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They aren't worn out. They're vintage.

Why do my dwarves love ass so much? I've been getting at least three with every migrant wave.
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I challenge you to a game of 'Hide the Sausage', to the death.
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