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[☼!!Troll Fur Sock!!☼]

Silly question, to allow better connection between the beard and the brain! Oh, and also all these years of being the best armoursmiths in the world and the fact you just don't go out without a helmet if you're a dwarf caused their skull to get thinner and thinner, every generation.

Why it is not possible to order dwarves to fill ponds... with magma?



^about tanning - you know, there was no worse place to be if you are easily nauseated than a medieval tanning workshop. Google it if you don't know why.
So... you're suggesting that dwarves produce magma from alcohol in their bodies?

[LoneChipmunk]

Because Magma is a holy substance unsuitable to be carried about like water. The only proper way to move magma around is by the use of machinery or, in a pinch, a big bucket (minecart).

Why do goblins hang around during a seige for months at a time when the front gate is slammed shut?

[WoobMonkey]

They're admiring the architecture.  Plus, if they just go home, they get fed to the trolls - or, worse yet, to the kidnapped dwarf children!

Why do so many migrants think that fishing is a desirable profession for an evil biome, don'tyoudarestepoutside, fortress?

[smjjames]

Because they know they can fish in the caves, which is unfortunately, bugged right now.

Why do bandits like to hide out in catacombs at the risk of waking a mummy?

[LoneChipmunk]

Because a mummy is a safer target than a dwarven adventurer.

Why don't dwarves have sex?

[klefenz]

Because they dont have genitals.

What happens if a dwarf shaves? (i mean after escaping the other dwarves who yell !!HERESY!!)

[ImagoDeo]

Um... they can, if you don't have them busy doing other things.  Perhaps it's because you don't let them idle?

Floors, yes, walls, no. They will clean walls directly next to floors when they clean the floors, but they cannot clean the walls themselves.

It's the only reason I use DFHack right now. >_<

[McDonald]

^about tanning - you know, there was no worse place to be if you are easily nauseated than a medieval tanning workshop. Google it if you don't know why.

Holy shit.

Because they dont have genitals.

What happens if a dwarf shaves? (i mean after escaping the other dwarves who yell !!HERESY!!)

They can't do any job, because beards are needed for everything. Also, their beards are in reality their brains, so yeah...

Why dwarves don't poo poo or pee pee?

[☼!!Troll Fur Sock!!☼]

What happens if a dwarf shaves? (i mean after escaping the other dwarves who yell !!HERESY!!)

Only adamantine-diamond razors can  cut dwarven beards. And even they have hard time doing it.

Why dwarves don't poo poo or pee pee?

Because of how world in DF works, and how much alcohol dwarves drink, reality would crash itself while trying to handle that amount of fluids.

Why did the migrant cross the road?

[WoobMonkey]

To take up fishing and cheese-making, in a brand-new home!

Why don't dwarves grow flower gardens?

[McDonald]

To take up fishing and cheese-making, in a brand-new home!

Why don't dwarves grow flower gardens?

You can't make booze from flowers.

Why are there no light sources in DF?

[Urist McRas]

There are. But dwarfs don't need light to see, so they don't care for light sources.

Why don't dwarfs build temples?

[smjjames]

Because they are largely secular. Although maybe they will in the upcoming version, no idea.

Why haven't they developed the internal combustion engine?

[jcochran]

Because of all the alcohol in the dwarves, every attempt at such experiments have resulted in the incineration of the experimenter.

Why can't you make a magma "waterwheel" using nethercap?

[McDonald]

Because of all the alcohol in the dwarves, every attempt at such experiments have resulted in the incineration of the experimenter.

Why can't you make a magma "waterwheel" using nethercap?

Because magma would cool to quickly to be effective.

Why nobles demand windows underground?