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Author Topic: Dwarven... "Child Care"  (Read 162137 times)

Hitty40

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #30 on: August 14, 2011, 12:36:10 am »


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if there's lots of g's and z's, it's gobbo. If you don't really recognize it, it's human. if it's called Urist, it's dwarf.

Plank of Wood

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #31 on: August 14, 2011, 12:38:10 am »

oh u
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The science of burning innocent children could be perfected into clockwork.
They're like little bearded corals.

Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #32 on: August 14, 2011, 12:43:52 am »

I fervently hope this becomes the new mermaid thread.
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Tcei

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #33 on: August 14, 2011, 12:51:11 am »

Im beginning to wonder if the goblins arent trying to do the children a favor.

All this plan needs is some forgotten beast syndrome that turns the children into zombie super soldiers.
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Plank of Wood

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #34 on: August 14, 2011, 12:56:44 am »

You're right.

Numbness Syndrome + Skin Necrosis Syndrome could mean that the "Baptism by fire" would not be necessary, as well as making the SuperDwarfs immune to pain.   
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The science of burning innocent children could be perfected into clockwork.
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Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #35 on: August 14, 2011, 12:57:23 am »

Skin+fat necrosis syndrome would also make them fireproof.

MODDING GO
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Plank of Wood

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #36 on: August 14, 2011, 01:00:51 am »

Perhaps modding in "Syndrome Wombles", which has syndrome blood which causes these things. By throwing them into a weapon trap full of serrated discs and draining the blood into the Child-Care chambers, we can easily control the dosage and make sure the SuperDwarfs get the Womble Serum.
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The science of burning innocent children could be perfected into clockwork.
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Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #37 on: August 14, 2011, 01:03:05 am »

Or maybe make them smallish animals with large litters and gaseous secretions with the syndrome? That way it can apply the syndrome as it fights the children.
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moki

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #38 on: August 14, 2011, 07:43:15 am »

By Armok, that's completely sick... I love it! :D

But I think, most would go mad after a few years... maybe it'll work with masterwork engraved floor, masterwork furniture and a waterfall. Please, try it for !!SCIENCE!!
A 3x3 room sounds pretty good, but I don't know if it's enough to make a single animal rabid. A 2x2 is enough for one dwarf. Quantum stockpile and a bed are needed, table and throne are for the good mood. If you have some useless craft artifacts, you can throw them in as well for the future superdwarf to admire.


Oh, I can just imagine a dwarven scientist with cave spider silk lab coat and kitten leather hat... "Bring in the Syndrome Wombles!"
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Crazy Cow

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #39 on: August 14, 2011, 09:28:27 am »

Yeah... you remember all of those children snatched by Gobbos?
They're in a better place now.

I'm making a fortress with the sole intent of testing this. I'm going to experiment with a few small changes, and I'll post the results.

Yoink

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #40 on: August 14, 2011, 09:41:38 am »

Just adding my support to this idea! :D You could have an entire floor of your fortress devoted to this, with tonnes of little rooms each with a kid and a dog.
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Girlinhat

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #41 on: August 14, 2011, 09:49:16 am »

but I don't know if it's enough to make a single animal rabid.
That's why you include a female animal.  It will breed in the cage, and the offspring will be rabid.  I'm starting to believe that a 2x2 or 3x3 would be much preferred.  The issue, still, is insanity.  Keeping the child from going mad during the whole process will be quite difficult.  Investing in masterwork platinum chairs may be in order.  Or perhaps restructure the entire thing to allow for statues.  I prefer the hanging cage just because of the terror it invokes, but a raised platform with statue walls would be very easy to admire, and if it had a table and chair, then the child could enjoy a royal dining hall.  A bed and they enjoy a royal bedroom.  A 3x3 would allow for a bed, chair, table, quantum food pile, central waterfall grate, and a few tiles left over.  I'm debating the use of a 2x2 room with a downstairs 1x2, that's room for an upstairs chair, table, food, and stairs, and a downstairs bed and stairs.

Also, I have no idea how to handle the moods, except to remain hopeful or allow a temporary escape.  But who wants to let the buggers out?

Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #42 on: August 14, 2011, 10:14:00 am »

Perhaps using a meeting area to restrain the child and animals to a 2x2 area would work. You could then have a larger enclosure and place a craft shop in it. When the child gets a mood, simply see what he wants and dump three of each down the hatch into his room.
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warwizard

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #43 on: August 14, 2011, 10:32:22 am »

ok two thoughts:
1) Burrow the married female dwarves into a birthing chamber where every tile is a cage trap, the newborns get caged before the mothers can grab em. Build and lever connect the caged babies cages over the grate and open the grate and pull the lever to drop in the baby.

For the moods have a forbidden door to another room 3X4 with stockpile of needed materials and build the needed workshop then let the door be passable, forbid all other materials in the fort, baby claims work... !! wait WHAT moods, these kids will not have dabbling in anything except animal care, give the kid a smithy and 1 bar of metal, and Profile the thing to only allow that kid to use it, later once the kid has made his pile of bolts you can set up for his later mood as a weaponsmith!
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Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Dwarven... "Child Care"
« Reply #44 on: August 14, 2011, 10:41:52 am »

All the theories behind that post are wrong. Cage traps won't catch babies, babies can't survive without their mothers, dwarves without moodable skills default to either stonecrafting, woodcrafting, or bone carving, and children won't do work of any sort.
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