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Author Topic: Dark lord RTD  (Read 13982 times)

NoahTophatz

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #30 on: August 26, 2011, 07:58:58 pm »

Mutie? My eldrtich fluffykins? He is a graceful and proud creature! That may or may not be the essence of every nightmare since the beginning of time and will cause you to go mad by being near it. <3
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Mutie? My eldrtich fluffykins? He is a graceful and proud creature! That may or may not be the essence of every nightmare since the beginning of time and will cause you to go mad by being near it.

Dermonster

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #31 on: August 26, 2011, 08:00:03 pm »

 :D My life is complete! For now, anyway.
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I can do anything I want, as long as I accept the consequences.
"Y'know, my favorite thing about being a hero is that it gives you all kinds of narrative justification to just slay any ol' jerk who gets in the way - Black Mage.
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Draignean

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #32 on: August 26, 2011, 11:11:41 pm »

It is time for Robert the terrible to make a name for himself, it was time for pyromancy!

Claim the kitchen, begin creating weighted throwing muffins of burning using my pyromancy and whatever supplies we have in stock.
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I have a degree in Computer Seance, that means I'm officially qualified to tell you that the problem with your system is that it's possessed by Satan.
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Aklyon

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #33 on: August 26, 2011, 11:20:20 pm »

But what about flaming weighted throwing muffins of burning?
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It's known as the Oppai-Kaiju effect. The islands of Japan generate a sort anti-gravity field, which allows breasts to behave as if in microgravity. It's also what allows Godzilla and friends to become 50 stories tall, and lets ninjas run up the side of a skyscraper.

Draignean

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #34 on: August 26, 2011, 11:29:06 pm »

I thought that would be redundant...

I'll save that for the crullers. :P
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I have a degree in Computer Seance, that means I'm officially qualified to tell you that the problem with your system is that it's possessed by Satan.
---
Q: "Do you have any idea what you're doing?"
A: "No, not particularly."

wolfchild

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #35 on: August 27, 2011, 12:06:32 am »

I would like to be on the waiting-list please
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Ahra

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #36 on: August 27, 2011, 07:33:38 am »

"i will at last have my own laboratory, oh yes...."
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dragnar

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #37 on: August 27, 2011, 01:29:21 pm »

FInd an empty room, and begin making it into my labratory
[4] you find a mostly-undamaged room and get to work setting up a lab. Your 'help' is rather useless, but before long you have all the essentials set up and ready to be used.

Aid in the creation of the labratory
[2] You are the worst lab assistant. The worst. At least you don't get in the way though.

Begin founding "evil banks of doom," which are just normal banks but with a more ominous atmosphere inside, with any funds available.
[1] You set up an evil bank on the first floor of the tower. Then you realize there aren't any customers for miles around...

Attempt to use the classical greek element of earth to magic up some magical (And regular) firing ranges and training rooms.
[5](note: your 2-7 is everyone else's 1-6. Your 1 and 8 though...) Well, any magical qualties are gonna have to wait. But you do reshape a few of the empty rooms into some basic training areas for any future minions.

Set up a lab in the dungeons. Having cages, restraints, and torture implements at the ready will likely prove invaluable.
[2] While a lab in the dungeons would be nice, it seems the place gat badly damaged when the last dark lord got chased out of here. You spend most of your time just cleaning the place up.

It is time for Robert the terrible to make a name for himself, it was time for pyromancy!

Claim the kitchen, begin creating weighted throwing muffins of burning using my pyromancy and whatever supplies we have in stock.

[6] You have rocks in stock. Lots of them. THAT IS PERFECT FOR MAKING MUFFINS FROM! One overly large fireball later, you have a batch of very hot muffin-shaped coals.

"i will at last have my own laboratory, oh yes...."
[5] And what a laboratory it is! You manage to claim the tower's old lab on the top floor, already full of every tool you might need. Hardly even takes any repairs to get the place functional.
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areyoua

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #38 on: August 27, 2011, 01:44:38 pm »

It doesn't matter where it is, just that it exists! (kind of)

Keep founding evil banks, banks everywhere! Surely, this will end the world.

Draignean

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #39 on: August 27, 2011, 01:48:37 pm »

Muffins! Glorious muffins of war! Still his meager stocks of ingredients wouldn't allow the creation of his more pyromantic pastries. He'd need to put together an ingredient list for his creations, then he'd go into town with a few of his dormies later.

Assemble ingredient lists for,

Twenty four fragmentation chip cookies

A dozen high explosive donuts

Six time delay cruller charges

A thermobaric pie

Two loaves of instant rise imperma-wheat bread

A demon summoning Soufflé

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I have a degree in Computer Seance, that means I'm officially qualified to tell you that the problem with your system is that it's possessed by Satan.
---
Q: "Do you have any idea what you're doing?"
A: "No, not particularly."

adwarf

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #40 on: August 27, 2011, 01:53:20 pm »

Begin planning, and constructing a humanoid robot frame then create an ai program for it that makes it listen to my commands
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UltraValican

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #41 on: August 27, 2011, 01:56:56 pm »

Go to town and try to commision work to build a bank
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areyoua

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #42 on: August 27, 2011, 02:21:11 pm »

Already quitting work in the lab?  :P I think what I should do is float the bank on the stock market and then collapse it just to ruin the world's economy, I think I'll call it Les Men Sisters

Ahra

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #43 on: August 27, 2011, 02:27:24 pm »

i shall take whatever dried herbs may be in the lab and make the most poisonus brew i can...
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And then the horror hits: This was just spring.
We are SOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo fucked.
Quite fucked indeed.

IronyOwl

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Re: Dark lord RTD
« Reply #44 on: August 27, 2011, 04:03:09 pm »

Continue cleaning and lab-prepping!
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The kitchenette mold free, you move on to the pantry. it's nasty in there. The bacon is grazing on the lettuce. The ham is having an illicit affair with the prime rib, The potatoes see all, know all. A rat in boxer shorts smoking a foul smelling cigar is banging on a cabinet shouting about rent money.
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