Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  
Pages: 1 2 3 [4] 5 6 ... 10

Author Topic: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!  (Read 57423 times)

Khym Chanur

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #45 on: September 18, 2011, 01:52:57 am »

How are you going to keep attracting immigrants after the deaths mount up?
Logged

Oliolli

  • Bay Watcher
  • [PREFSTRING:unlikeability]
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #46 on: September 18, 2011, 05:30:12 am »

When immigration ends, reproduction begins.
Logged

Quote from: Girlinhat
When all you've got is an adjustable spanner and an entire freight warehouse of terrifying cogs and gears, everything looks like "just a prototype".
Quote from: ThatAussieGuy
You all turned Swordthunders into a bastion of madness that seems to warp in on itself under its own hatred of sanity.  I'm so happy!
Quote from: Loud Whispers
drowning babies everywhere o-o

Murphy

  • Bay Watcher
  • Lazy half-ass
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsuprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #47 on: September 18, 2011, 06:26:19 am »

...the elf going melancholy and the donkey going berserk. The donkey then killed my weaver. Now the donkey is chasing a giant moose around my map..
Now you will know why you fear the night ass demons.
Logged

NRDL

  • Bay Watcher
  • I Actually Like Elves
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #48 on: September 18, 2011, 06:28:10 am »

This would be a good opportunity for eugenic experiments.  Choose two potential parents, whose traits and personality you prefer, and lock them in a room with food and booze.  If they don't hate each other, they'll probably fall in love.  View the children to see if they take any traits from their parents, use this for several generations until you get awesome dwarves. 
Logged
GOD DAMN IT NRDL.
NRDL will roll a die and decide how sadistic and insane he's feeling well you do.

Crustypeanut

  • Bay Watcher
  • Ph.Dwarf & Practitioner of ‼MEDICINE‼
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #49 on: September 18, 2011, 06:28:40 am »

How are you going to keep attracting immigrants after the deaths mount up?

Health Insurance.  Free Health Insurance.
Logged
Specialsurprise - a Tale of ‼Medicine‼ and ‼Science‼ !

sirquote

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #50 on: September 18, 2011, 06:43:30 am »

Great work, the results are hilarious by the way you have reported it.

One question tho, who or what do you have in line for any berserkuncooperative dwarfs?
Logged

accoro

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #51 on: September 18, 2011, 07:03:01 am »

I am so trying this.

The eugenics thing also. I'll aspire to be the Doktor's apprentice!
Logged
Stand there pondering all the great mysteries of the DF universe.  The last thing going through his head being of course the Atom Smasher.

Komra

  • Bay Watcher
  • This is your brain on DF
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #52 on: September 18, 2011, 07:44:49 am »

once you run out of floors, water cushioning at various levels from certain heights would be interesting.
Logged
But you never see a movie where a terrible coal plant accident causes a horrible devastation, do you? Nope, everyone seems to think that nuclear plants get their energy by smacking live atomic warheads all day or something.

GreatWyrmGold

  • Bay Watcher
  • Sane, by the local standards.
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #53 on: September 18, 2011, 07:58:18 am »

How are you going to keep attracting immigrants after the deaths mount up?

Health Insurance.  Free Health Insurance.
On the down side, no life insurance.
Logged
Sig
Are you a GM with players who haven't posted? TheDelinquent Players Help will have Bay12 give you an action!
[GreatWyrmGold] gets a little crown. May it forever be his mark of Cain; let no one argue pointless subjects with him lest they receive the same.

Crustypeanut

  • Bay Watcher
  • Ph.Dwarf & Practitioner of ‼MEDICINE‼
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #54 on: September 18, 2011, 09:09:53 am »

One question tho, who or what do you have in line for any berserkuncooperative dwarfs?

Any uncooperative dwarves will be "Gently" "Persuaded" by the Doktor's lovely nurses.

One nurse, Emma, is short, constantly cheerful, but clumsy.  The other, Helene, is large, bald, and grumpy.
« Last Edit: September 21, 2011, 03:41:53 pm by Crustypeanut »
Logged
Specialsurprise - a Tale of ‼Medicine‼ and ‼Science‼ !

Komra

  • Bay Watcher
  • This is your brain on DF
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #55 on: September 18, 2011, 12:46:21 pm »

That would be an awesome weapon- with about 2x or 3x stab damage, perhaps... *examining raws*
and skill could be based in one of the more oft-used hospital skills, maybe suturing- it's used for fixing stab wounds, so you'd know where the worst injuries are... *scribbling*
*mad cackling* C-can you poison weapons? HAHAHAHAHA! FREE LETHAL INJECTIONS FER AL TEH GOBBOS! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!
I need to calm down...calm... calmcalmcalmcalm...
Logged
But you never see a movie where a terrible coal plant accident causes a horrible devastation, do you? Nope, everyone seems to think that nuclear plants get their energy by smacking live atomic warheads all day or something.

Crustypeanut

  • Bay Watcher
  • Ph.Dwarf & Practitioner of ‼MEDICINE‼
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #56 on: September 18, 2011, 01:03:38 pm »

No I don't believe you can poison weapons sadly.  Still, you could easily impliment the Medic's needle gun from TF2.  :D
Logged
Specialsurprise - a Tale of ‼Medicine‼ and ‼Science‼ !

Crustypeanut

  • Bay Watcher
  • Ph.Dwarf & Practitioner of ‼MEDICINE‼
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #57 on: September 18, 2011, 04:44:28 pm »

Journal of Dr. Logum, Ph.Dwarf, Chief Medical Officer of Ganadstot, “Specialsurprise”

As of the last journal entry, no new test subjects arrived, and we are sitting at 41 available subjects.  The general moral of the camp is average, with Subject 9 seemingly the only unhappy one among them.  The promise of easy work, free booze, and loads of free time is being kept and is keeping spirits up for the most part. 

This fourth phase of testing will conclude, hopefully, the second phase of testing – we will be seeing the return of subjects 6, 7, 9, and 10 to the experiment.  Every one of them, plus a fifth subject, will be dropped from three stories. 


---------------------------------------------

Subject 6: Male, approx. 66 years, average

Medical Health: All previous wounds healed admirably, no lasting, visible scars.

Test: Three Story Drop

Results: Subject suffered instantaneous death upon landing.  Unknown if it is due to landing technique or fluke.   Subject did not survive.

Notes: A fairly uneventful test.. results did not even procure workable material to practice my skills on.  Such a shame, such a waste of material.

--
Subject 7:  Male, approx 55 years, corpulent (Boy did he let himself go)

Medical Health: All previous wounds except his shoulder have healed.  His shoulder bone was unable to heal , probably due to the inability to immobilize it. (Bug?) Shoulder is infected.

Test: Three Story Drop

Results: Instantaneous death.  Body is completely intact.  Results indicate previous test was not a fluke.  Further testing is needed.  Subject did not survive.

Notes: Again, a waste of material to work with.  At the least however, we may be able to salvage the cloth and thread from expired subjects.  Recycling is important.  If only we could recycle the bodies themselves to help feed the other subjects.

--
Subject 9: Female, approx 55 years, Thin

Medical Health: All previous wounds have healed, except the lower spine's nervous tissue.  Injury is permanent, and results in permanent loss of lower limb function. 

Test: Three Story Drop

Results: First toe on the right foot broken, smashed open, and bruised.   Left Lower Leg bruised and broken.  Right Upper Leg bruised and broken.  Lower body bruised.  Guts is bruised. (That's what it says)

Treatment: Upper Right Leg and Left Lower leg need suturing, setting, and immobilization.  First toe, right food needs dressing, suturing, and surgery.  Left Lower Leg also needs Traction.

Notes: Although Subject 9 was in very little pain from the impact, due to the absence of feeling in it's lower body and beyond, Nurse Emma gave it a generous amount of tranquilizer to put it out so I may work on it without it having to attempt a diagnosis of itself as well as it insulting my medical practices.   Seeing Subject 9, of all the subjects, survive is both a boon and a curse.  A boon because it is good to see that the three story drop experiment isn't completely fatal, and a curse because Subject 9 was the one that is the most troublesome, due mainly in part to its medical expertise. 

Subject 9 is now resting in traction, which is preferable to it being anywhere near other test subjects, where it is able to spread its lies.


--
Subject 10: Female, approx 86 years, extremely muscular

Medical Health: All previous wounds have healed admirably

Test: Three Story Drop

Results: Subject is in critical condition.  Lower Left Leg bruised and broken, Upper Right Leg bruised and broken, Lower Right Leg bruised and broken, Guts is bruised, Lower and Upper Body Bruised, Middle Spine broken.  Subject cannot breathe.

Treatment: Not applicable.  Subject suffocated before treatment could begin.  Most likely due to the injury to the spine.  Subject did not survive.

Notes: An interesting result.. the subject survived the landing, but due to the major injury to its middle spine, suffocated shortly afterward. 

--
Subject 16: Female, approx 77 years, fat

Test: Three Story Drop

Results: Instantaneous death upon impact.  Subject did not survive.

Notes:  The results corresponded with the majority of the previous tests of this phase, so it was expected.

-------------------------------------------------

And thus concludes the fourth phase of testing.  Sixty-Percent of the tests concluded that a three story drop is fatal upon impact.  The fifth phase of testing will attempt to confirm this.  Fifteen test subjects will be chosen at random, five of which will be dropped simultaneously in three mass tests.  Due to the arrival of two more waves of test subjects during the fourth phase of testing, space at the testing facilities is running low, thus it is imperative that we make room for more test subjects.  Confirming this experiment by using large volumes of subjects will be the key to this. 

Subject 9 still evades expiration.  It has survived three tests so far, more than any other subject to date.  It has survived a one story, two story, and three story fall.  I will give it a few months recuperation before more testing on the subject will resume.  For now, Subject 9 will remain in traction, kept constantly sedated as to not disturb me with its insufferable ramblings. 



-----------------------------------------

As of this phase of testing, Dr. Logum is currently at Adequate Diagnostician, Wound Dresser, Suturer, and Bone Doctor.  Surgeon remains at Dabbling, but is nearing Novice.
Logged
Specialsurprise - a Tale of ‼Medicine‼ and ‼Science‼ !

GreatWyrmGold

  • Bay Watcher
  • Sane, by the local standards.
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #58 on: September 18, 2011, 04:57:25 pm »

Suggesting you use 5 further subjects to confirm 3-story fatality rates and use the other 10 to estimate 4-story fatality rates.
Logged
Sig
Are you a GM with players who haven't posted? TheDelinquent Players Help will have Bay12 give you an action!
[GreatWyrmGold] gets a little crown. May it forever be his mark of Cain; let no one argue pointless subjects with him lest they receive the same.

Person

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: "Specialsurprise", The Medical Experiment - For SCIENCE!
« Reply #59 on: September 18, 2011, 05:22:00 pm »

Is skill rot off? Otherwise there's no way Morul II will be as awesome as Morul I. Just saying.

Edit: Also, didn't read the whole thing yet, but if a creature falls on another living creature it takes no damage, but both are knocked out for a bit. I suspect that the cat landed on one of the others that was bleeding out.
« Last Edit: September 18, 2011, 05:26:24 pm by Person »
Logged
Please don't let textbooks invade Bay12.
The Conquistadors only have the faintest idea of what the modern world is like when they are greeted by two hostile WWI Veterans riding on a giant potato; Welcome to 2016.
Pages: 1 2 3 [4] 5 6 ... 10