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Author Topic: One-liner game contest! (The winner is...)  (Read 6427 times)

Canalan

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #45 on: November 30, 2011, 07:06:07 pm »

sin(b)/tan(b) = Cosby.

jhxmt

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #46 on: November 30, 2011, 07:06:48 pm »

(Not entering for the game, I'm just enjoying the awful puns!  :P)

A priest, a rabbi and an athiest walk into a bar.  The bartender says, "What is this, a joke?"
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Try slaughtering a ton of animals, meat makes less decisions than animals.

Why Your Ramps Don't Work
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dogstile

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #47 on: November 30, 2011, 07:14:17 pm »

EDIT: Changing my entry.

If babies can fall out, Midgets can climb in.

>> If you have to ask if you've reached overkill yet, you haven't. << changing it up. I DON'T LIKE THIS ONE ANYMORE

I'm entering and not expecting to win. My rule to myself was that I had to type the first thing that popped into my head in under seven seconds.

There are only 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't ;)

BADUM-TUSH!

Not to ruin that, but aren't you missing six leading bits there buddy boy? ;D
« Last Edit: November 30, 2011, 07:32:43 pm by dogstile »
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my champion is now holding his artifact crossbow by his upper left leg and still shooting with is just fine despite having no hands.
What? He's firing from the hip.

Itnetlolor

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #48 on: November 30, 2011, 07:17:03 pm »

One day I was going for a run, but the damn thing got away so I settled for a walk.
A better one could be:

"I had to go for a run, but I was too late getting to the bathroom."

I already have the game, but this is still a fun topic.

"I'm going to be like a baby and head out."
« Last Edit: November 30, 2011, 07:19:57 pm by Itnetlolor »
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Flying Dice

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #49 on: November 30, 2011, 07:21:02 pm »

A pony, a man, and an elf walk into a bar. The pony says to the elf, "What brings you here?". The elf turns to the man, "I suppose you're Lazarus Long, then?"
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Cake
Aurora on small monitors:
1. Game Parameters -> Reduced Height Windows.
2. Lock taskbar to the right side of your desktop.
3. Run Resize Enable

Paul

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #50 on: November 30, 2011, 07:21:59 pm »

Two frogs hop into a bar. The first says "Bud" The second says "Wei" The bartender says "Holy shit talking frogs!"
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Roboboy33

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #51 on: November 30, 2011, 07:25:33 pm »

A man walks into a bar, politely orders a drink and stays there for a few hours. He then takes a bus home, and goes to bed early because he has to get to work early.

Did I win?
Dont get it.
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SHUT UP AND ENJOY THE CATS

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩۞۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

Peewee

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #52 on: November 30, 2011, 07:25:52 pm »

A man walks into a bar. WHAM!
A man walks into a bar. A few moment later, he is thrown out by the priest, the rabbi, and the athiest, for ruining their joke.
A man walks into a bar, politely orders a drink and stays there for a few hours. He then takes a bus home, and goes to bed early because he has to get to work early.
Two frogs hop into a bar. The first says "Bud" The second says "Wei" The bartender says "Holy shit talking frogs!"
A pony, a man, and an elf walk into a bar. The pony says to the elf, "What brings you here?". The elf turns to the man, "I suppose you're Lazarus Long, then?"
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one asks for a beer. The second asks for half a beer. The third starts to ask for a quarter of a beer, but the bartender gives them 2 beers and tells them to split it up themselves.

(totally fits on one line with my two screens set up next to each other)
« Last Edit: November 30, 2011, 07:28:19 pm by Peewee »
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Bdthemag

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #53 on: November 30, 2011, 07:30:24 pm »

A man walks into a bar. WHAM!
A man walks into a bar. A few moment later, he is thrown out by the priest, the rabbi, and the athiest, for ruining their joke.
A man walks into a bar, politely orders a drink and stays there for a few hours. He then takes a bus home, and goes to bed early because he has to get to work early.
Two frogs hop into a bar. The first says "Bud" The second says "Wei" The bartender says "Holy shit talking frogs!"
A pony, a man, and an elf walk into a bar. The pony says to the elf, "What brings you here?". The elf turns to the man, "I suppose you're Lazarus Long, then?"
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one asks for a beer. The second asks for half a beer. The third starts to ask for a quarter of a beer, but the bartender gives them 2 beers and tells them to split it up themselves.

(totally fits on one line with my two screens set up next to each other)
Hah, seen that one before. Isn't it from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy? (Probably not, just the first thing I thought of when I read that joke.)
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Well, you do have a busy life, what with keeping tabs on wild, rough-and-tumble forum members while sorting out the drama between your twenty two inner lesbians.
Your drunk posts continue to baffle me.
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Itnetlolor

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #54 on: November 30, 2011, 09:34:18 pm »

Just came up with this one recently while watching the Christmas at the Rockefeller Center thing. Everyone collapsed laughing for a good few minutes straight; mostly also because of how appropriate it is nowadays. It came after I was thinking how some musicians' voices tend to age like wine, and others, like milk.

Quote
"Today's culture has been aging like milk lately; It started off sweet, then went sour, then bitter, and then after a short process, turned cheesy."

The relevance of that statement could be applied to just about anything. It's my new worldview of today. Hell, I'm sigging it myself.

EDIT:
And done. Added to collection for posterity.
« Last Edit: December 01, 2011, 01:22:18 am by Itnetlolor »
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Bouchart

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #55 on: November 30, 2011, 09:56:06 pm »

Have you ever noticed that men always leave the toilet seat up?

That's the joke.
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klingon13524

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #56 on: December 01, 2011, 03:11:11 am »

A man walks into a bar, politely orders a drink and stays there for a few hours. He then takes a bus home, and goes to bed early because he has to get to work early.

Did I win?
That's two lines on my screen.

Edit: Now it's one line, but only in this quote... Fine, I guess it counts.
« Last Edit: December 01, 2011, 03:15:30 am by klingon13524 »
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By creating a gobstopper that never loses its flavor he broke thermodynamics
Maybe it's parasitic. It never loses its flavor because you eventually die from having your nutrients stolen by it.

Dsarker

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #57 on: December 01, 2011, 03:17:38 am »

It's all fun and games until somebody loses an eye. Then it's all eye scream.
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klingon13524

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #58 on: December 01, 2011, 11:35:11 am »

Bump, in hopes that I'll get a decent (original) entry.
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By creating a gobstopper that never loses its flavor he broke thermodynamics
Maybe it's parasitic. It never loses its flavor because you eventually die from having your nutrients stolen by it.

shadenight123

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Re: One-liner game contest! (Lunatics allowed!) (Good entries needed)
« Reply #59 on: December 01, 2011, 11:42:35 am »

let's try this one:

the best way to be single is to not have a kitchen.
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“Well,” he said. “We’re in the Forgotten hunting grounds I take it. Your screams just woke them up early. Congratulations, Lyara.”
“Do something!” she whispered, trying to keep her sight on all of them at once.
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“There, I did something. I clapped. I like clapping,” he said. -The Investigator And The Case Of The Missing Brain.
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