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Poll

What's your opinion on the SCP-foundation

It's cool to read.
- 28 (56%)
It's kind of obtuse.
- 4 (8%)
Pretensious
- 4 (8%)
Stop ripping it off, Kitten, you hack.
- 12 (24%)
No
- 2 (4%)

Total Members Voted: 48


Pages: 1 ... 49 50 [51] 52 53 ... 257

Author Topic: You are Patient Zero  (Read 309987 times)

Graknorke

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #750 on: June 23, 2012, 04:43:48 pm »

So wait, you didn't want it to sound sexual, then described it as a "culinary orgasm"?
Plus, if it was moaning, you could have made a joke about Zombie-discriminatory beliefs that they all make simple animalistic noises.
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Kitten Snot

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #751 on: June 25, 2012, 12:58:52 pm »

Let's just stop about dead people's orgasms before my brain decides to like it, ok? Besides, I'm to stupid to come up with something funny like that. My humor comes down to: "Random shit happens and it's silly, fnar fnar".

You go back to your personal container and grab your laptop.
As you really need to find out where you even are you decide to take a look at Google maps to find out.
You quickly find out where you are. So the town is called Marigold. There are two schools in the area.
One is a collage, so useless to your endeavors. And the elementary school is....
Right across the hospital that blew up. Dicks

So that plan's out of the window! How are we going to get little children to follow us now!
Bad thought.
You need to rethink your plan a little bit.
SCHIZOPHRENIC THINKING MODE. ACTIVATED.

Stats:
Health: Unhurt
Energy: Feelin' fine
Infectivity 30%
Hunger: Peckish
Durability level 2
Inventory:8 Biobombs. 28 worms. one 357. magnum, 78 357. bullets,
Gun experience: Can hit broad side of barn.(getting really rusty)
Safe-house security: 3

Horde:.
Allies:Diane Pie.

Just in case somebody doesn't get it the exploded hospital probably took the school out of commission.
"Know that your audience consists of geniuses but expect them to be morons." I'm pretty sure somebody, somewhere said that once.
Don't feel insulted pleaaaaaaaaaaaase?
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I make stories and sometimes people like them.
Well, they did that once.
I think.

Weirdsound

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #752 on: June 25, 2012, 01:31:29 pm »

Try museums, community pools (If it is summer), theme parks, arcades, toy stores, pediatric doctors offices, and skateparks.

Hopefully the town has at least one of those.
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stabbymcstabstab

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #753 on: June 25, 2012, 05:29:38 pm »

Find one of the actors so when we go to one of those places it doesn't look wierd that a middle age person is hanging around a bunch of kids.
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Long Live Arst- United Forenia!
"Wanna be a better liberal? Go get shot in the fuckin' face."
Contemplate why we have a sociopathic necrophiliac RAPIST sadomasochist bipolar monster in our ranks, also find some cheese.

zomara0292

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #754 on: June 26, 2012, 09:02:47 am »

pediatric doctors offices. That is a perfict place. Just have a mad rush in and out.
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I hear a piranha is good eating.  I have a spear; I'll be fine!
The Pilot and their cargo handlers paused when they saw that the entire camp is covered in eldritch runes coated in blood. And rotting monkey corpses everywhere..

They decide that they didn't get paid enough for this..

Mr. Palau

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #755 on: June 26, 2012, 10:53:12 am »

pediatric doctors offices. That is a perfict place. Just have a mad rush in and out.
THIS
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you can't just go up to people and get laid.

Kitten Snot

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #756 on: June 27, 2012, 10:35:16 am »

You decide to look up pediatric doctor offices in the city. As luck would have it there is... One.
We are gonna have to camp that isn't it?
You take along your less conspicuous zombies and also decide to try getting one of the actors with you so you don't look weird in that office.
You wander through the city for a while, looking through the likely hiding spots.

After an hour or so you find a playground filled with children.
You look around a bit and see no adults. As you give a final look around you notice that one of them is, in fact, one of the actors.
You step onto the playground and instantly all of the children rush at you.
One of them bites into your leg but after one of them screamed that you are "daddy" She instantly stops trying to bite you and looks as if she just killed her favorite pony.

She looks at you with tears in her eyes then rushes over to the swingset, lunges her head backwards and.
BONK! She falls back, bleeding from the forehead, and slumps back to you, unhappy.
You count up that there are 12 of them.
Mmmkay, change of plans. Slightly.



Stats:
Health: Unhurt
Energy:Fine
Infectivity 30%
Hunger: Peckish
Durability level 2
Inventory:8 Biobombs. 28 worms. one 357. magnum, 78 357. bullets,
Gun experience: Can hit broad side of barn.(getting really rusty)
Safe-house security: 3

Horde:.
Allies:Diane Pie.
Logged
I make stories and sometimes people like them.
Well, they did that once.
I think.

zomara0292

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #757 on: June 27, 2012, 11:09:45 am »

Change of plan is right. They need food. We have to take them back To Diane. But, lets get some meat for them first.
Also, make note of who called us daddy. is she the little one form before? (that we controled)
Logged
I hear a piranha is good eating.  I have a spear; I'll be fine!
The Pilot and their cargo handlers paused when they saw that the entire camp is covered in eldritch runes coated in blood. And rotting monkey corpses everywhere..

They decide that they didn't get paid enough for this..

Mr. Palau

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #758 on: June 27, 2012, 11:50:58 am »

Change of plan is right. They need food. We have to take them back To Diane. But, lets get some meat for them first.
Also, make note of who called us daddy. is she the little one form before? (that we controled)
or we could just continue with the plan with more children in tow and have them eat at the pediatric doctor's office.
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you can't just go up to people and get laid.

stabbymcstabstab

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #759 on: June 27, 2012, 12:16:27 pm »

Take the one that got hurt to the Doc's office after bring the rest to the WareHouse to get some thing to eat, Our Zed get stitiched up and gets to eat the doctor.
Logged
Long Live Arst- United Forenia!
"Wanna be a better liberal? Go get shot in the fuckin' face."
Contemplate why we have a sociopathic necrophiliac RAPIST sadomasochist bipolar monster in our ranks, also find some cheese.

Kitten Snot

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #760 on: June 29, 2012, 06:06:15 am »

You decide to take them back to warehouse for some candy FOOD.
You give one quick order and the one that called you "daddy" explains to the rest who you are.
The one who hit herself is still crying though. The bleeding child could be rather annoying to hide so you take one of the zombies' shirt and give it to her like one of those things Arabians wear.
They still do that,right?

When you arrive the smell of barbecue is hanging in the air.
What is definitely more alarming is the three police cars out front.
You rush inside and see one giant bloodbath.
Blood and guts cover almost every surface you can see at the entrance. Screams are still coming from somewhere.
But.... There are no zombie corpses and Diane isn't visible either.

You look over in her container and see her gleefully "working" on 6 cops.
All hanging in a long line in the same way the earlier guy was.
Looks like she managed to get a barbecue.
She turns around and sees you with all the children.

Ohh, my god. Look at you little guys! You are so freakin' adorable! She squeels with a grin from ear to ear.
What, in the name of the 26 gods of Krachnoks, happened here? You demand.
Simple, i knew somebody would call the police if i kept the screams up so i went ahead and set up an ambush.
First i tricked them into thinking I was a hostage while we propped up a corpse of some guy so he was holding a knife.
Of course, One of them who was convinced he was Dirty Harry or something.
She stops for a bit and walks over the the one closest to you. She gives him a chop on the spine. He screams loud enough to make your ears hurt.
That idiot shot the corpse.
They brought me over and then! The zombies, whom I put somewhere nearby, ambushed them.
I killed or incapacitated most of them while their backs were turned. They were so busy shooting uselessly at Snowflake they didn't notice it until I chopped off their hands.
She starts giggling maniacally after that story.

ANYWAY! Any of you guys hungry? Join the other zombies in the back of the warehouse. We have seats!


Stats:
Health: Unhurt
Energy:Fine
Infectivity 30%
Hunger: Peckish
Durability level 2
Inventory:8 Biobombs. 28 worms. one 357. magnum, 78 357. bullets,
Gun experience: Can hit broad side of barn.(getting really rusty)
Safe-house security: 3

Horde: 8 Children.
Allies:Diane Pie.
« Last Edit: June 30, 2012, 05:28:06 am by Kitten Snot »
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I make stories and sometimes people like them.
Well, they did that once.
I think.

zomara0292

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #761 on: June 29, 2012, 10:12:03 am »

Holy crap I am in lusty love!
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I hear a piranha is good eating.  I have a spear; I'll be fine!
The Pilot and their cargo handlers paused when they saw that the entire camp is covered in eldritch runes coated in blood. And rotting monkey corpses everywhere..

They decide that they didn't get paid enough for this..

Weirdsound

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #762 on: June 29, 2012, 11:27:07 am »

Get your food, look up truckstops, and attack one if our assistant hasn't gotten us a big rig yet.
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stabbymcstabstab

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #763 on: June 29, 2012, 11:32:25 am »

That is scary as hell.
Logged
Long Live Arst- United Forenia!
"Wanna be a better liberal? Go get shot in the fuckin' face."
Contemplate why we have a sociopathic necrophiliac RAPIST sadomasochist bipolar monster in our ranks, also find some cheese.

Kitten Snot

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Re: You are Patient Zero
« Reply #764 on: June 30, 2012, 04:44:37 am »

Well that's one thing off my "things to do before i die" checklist.
Make people like a cannibalistic and sadistic psycho that's based of of a pink pony.
Why yes, i do have a strange list.
My next one is writing a succesful fallout:Equestria fic and becoming a lawyer.
BOTH ARE COMPLETELY IMPOSSIBLE.
Logged
I make stories and sometimes people like them.
Well, they did that once.
I think.
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