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[Tawa]

The king wanted a nice bedroom, right? So I make him a golden statue.

The golden statue was of a mussel.

Guess what the king hates above all else?

EDIT: Wait, thank goodness. He hates oysters, not mussels.

CRISIS AVERTED

MAY THE GREAT MUSSEL LOOK OVER THE KING IN LIFE AND DEATH

[G3Kappa]

You freaking traders, I'm giving you 160k worth of food in exchange for 110k miscellanous items, including worthless toys and musical instruments. What else do you want? I made you tired? I'll take it seriously the next time?

I'll make sure you won't return to the Mountainhomes the next time.

[Cryxis, Prince of Doom]

Started playing again for the first time in months.
First new fort on a hill side and what do you know, Cinnabar, cinnabar every where!

[Dozebôm Lolumzalìs]

Started playing again for the first time in months.
First new fort on a hill side and what do you know, Cinnabar, cinnabar every where!

How's that a facepalm?

[Cryxis, Prince of Doom]

Started playing again for the first time in months.
First new fort on a hill side and what do you know, Cinnabar, cinnabar every where!

How's that a facepalm?

The unholy amount of hauling and the fact that I tryed as best I could to make it ideal, now I have to wait forever for stone hauling.. Which sucks... I guess it's not all too much of a face palm


So I'll supply an old one I recently remembered

Messed with the embark points for one fort and I wanted to make a textile industry so I brought like 40-50 sheep on embark.
Gave them a huge grazing area around a river
Winter came by and a few crossed to the other side while the river was frozen.
Spring hit and three of them fell into the water and were murdered by (lamprey?) and about 15 were trapped on the other side with no way of getting back so I ended up making a bridge


Also different fort that I wanted to have a fishing industry. Had a couple streams running through it. My two~three fishers went to the stream and all were pulled in by the Carl and killed by a combination of many carp and lamprey. The stream ran red with blood and the other dwarves ended up starving to death (got rid of embark seeds to give better fish related skills to my dwarves, not once did I think I should let them know how to swim)

[Tawa]

My two~three fishers went to the stream and all were pulled in by the Carl

DAMN YOU, CARL, DROWNER OF DWARVES

[Cryxis, Prince of Doom]

Aren't typos just great? 
That better end up on the OOCQ thread

[Alex Encandar]

I just killed my first dragon...and lost 2/3 of my fort in the process.

Locked my front gate, only to realized the dragon had breached my defenses and was burning 60 dwarves to death.

Killed him though, without even a proper military set up.

[G3Kappa]

I was building a small structure where two roads intersecated, and I was going to raise it a few floors to also serve as an archery tower.
But you can't build walls on the roof, you have to deconstruct the perimeter of the wall, and THEN build over the open space.

Well...




My fisherdwarf just had a pretty funny yet tragic Wile E. Coyote moment.

EDIT: I'm going to build a memorial right in the center of that building. "Here lies Urist McStupid"

[Atrushan]

I just recently had a random farmer become all secretive and claim a craftsdwarf's workshop. Normally I'd be perfectly all right with this, as I always have spare craftshops, except he decided he didn't want either of the ones on the workshop level. Oh no. He wanted the workshop dedicated entirely to strand extraction, which is only accessed through a 100 z-level staircase straight down to the top of the magma sea. So now I'm going to be out of a strand extractor for probably the rest of the season.

[Atrushan]

I just recently had a random farmer become all secretive and claim a craftsdwarf's workshop. Normally I'd be perfectly all right with this, as I always have spare craftshops, except he decided he didn't want either of the ones on the workshop level. Oh no. He wanted the workshop dedicated entirely to strand extraction, which is only accessed through a 100 z-level staircase straight down to the top of the magma sea. So now I'm going to be out of a strand extractor for probably the rest of the season.

Edit: So apparently I somehow managed to post this twice. There wouldn't happen to be a way to delete a post, would there?

[Dark One]

Forgetting about water pressure can often lead to lots of FUN.

[EuphoriaToRegret]

Most recently, my fort was found by a single kobold thief.

Seeing no problem with this, I sent out my newest squad of militia to kill it. They needed some combat.

The kobold attempted to escape by running along my river and down to the end of the map.

My squad gave chase and charged the kobold... half of them landing in the river.

The kobold single-highhandedly managed to inadvertently kill 3 dwarves through drowning.   


Edit: Didn't realize I had inadvertently in the sentence when I typed accidental.

Thanks for pointing it out 

[Rose]

"inadvertently" ... "accidental"

[Musashi]

Finally tried my hand at embarks in evil biomes. Even managed a decent little fortress in a map where the dead won't rest!
Which crumbled to its end starting from the moment migrants brought a water buffalo cow.
See, whenever I get grazers, I butcher them as fast as possible, and immediately process their skin into leather and hair into thread.
Well, for some reason, none of the 10+ dwarves idling in the same room, with the proper job activated, judged useful to rush to the hide in order to tan it, like they normally do every single damn time otherwise.
So the flapping skin of a water buffalo started killing everybody left and right, and by the time it was finally put down, zombie dwarves had already started rising, and you know the rest.
*facepalm* to myself, and *facepalm* to those lazy fuckers.
Note to self: fuck water buffaloes, just throw them whole into the zombie garbage dump. Never liked them anyway.